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LostMonkeyBoy
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The Gray Man (2022)
A great, hilarious and fun movie. Don't listen to the crybabies!
I've watched a lot of spy thrillers and action movies over many decades. Trust me when I say this is a GREAT movie. This isn't your dumb The Rock Red Notice Netflix junk. Ask yourself, do you really think Chris Evans, Ryan Gosling and the Russo Brothers would create something bad?
I have no idea what the negative reviewers were expecting. This is a funny movie at times from a non comedy, but also has a lot of heart, too. You can tell Chris Evans enjoyed every second of playing this character... it's worth watching just for his every scene. He often says and does things no villain in these types of movies would ever say, which catches you off guard. You'd have to watch it to understand. Ryan Gosling plays his part seriously, which heart and subtle humour. Trust me, this is a great movie.
F9 (2021)
Just when you thought it could not get dumber... it does
I've watched every single Fast movie in the cinema and have happily given my money since I was a young lad in exchange for a fun, good time, but the time has come I finally but my foot down...on the brakes!
I followed them become James Bond, Marvel Superhero level action heroes, taking down airplanes and blowing up submarines. And as ridiculous as those were, I gave the franchise the benefit of the doubt because they always made it somewhat plausible and you knew you were watching a big, dumb, action pop corn movie and as long as the story was easy to follow you were in for a good time.
The plot was and story were a mess. All over the place and made no sense. Just seemed like a bunch of jumbled up sequences stuck together.
For almost a decade I joked with friends and family how eventually the Fast & Furious crew will be racing in outer space eventually, because that was the most farfetched and ridiculous joke I could think of... and then they actually went and did it!
And to think all this started from stolen DVD players.
A Quiet Place Part II (2020)
You've seen it ALL before.. literally.
Much like how Home Alone 2 is a complete remake of the Home Alone 1, A Quiet Place Part II is a remake of A Quiet Place Part I, but not as good.
Literally NOTHING new happens and it even has the exact same ending as the first movie (this is not an exaggeration). It felt more like a walking dead episode. The story did not progress at all. We didn't learn anything new either. They could make 10 more movies at the pace this story moved at.
Jack and the Beanstalk (2009)
This is a very disturbing movie
I put this movie on to watch on Prime (good thing I didn't pay) with my wife and two daughters (6 and 2) because the older one has been reading Jack and Beanstalk for school. Within minutes of playing the movie there was a scene of Chloë Grace Moretz who must have been 10-11 at the time of filming, suggestively biting her lips and trying to look seductive to Jack while chained up. After he rescues her, they embrace is a very inappropriate way. I had to stop the movie right where it was. I don't need to see anything more.. my wife had a look of pure disbelief and shock on her face. This is not a kids film or a family film. This is a very disturbing movie made for perverts and podophiles.
Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)
This movie is only good if you think of it as a parody or kids comedy
You can tell as soon as it begins that it's going to be really bad, but you want to be wrong because you want to enjoy it. The early shot in the mall is so strange and corny, with really obvious, bad wire work and CGI. It only gets worst from there. Pedro Pascal is the ONLY good thing about this movie and I continued watching for him. Patty Jenkins needs to stop making these movies. I think the previous one was only good because she had help from Snyder. The best way to explain it is that this movie felt like Fantastic Four Rise of The Silver Surfer (2007) compared to the first movie. If you've seen those two movies you'll know what I mean, you'll get it.
xXx: Return of Xander Cage (2017)
Secondhand embarrassment to the Nth Degree
Paramount Pictures brings you the sequel to a movie you never wanted. The only people who will probably LOVE this movie are hardcore Vin Diesel fans, who feel he can do no wrong, and probably 14 year old boys who still enjoy dumb action movies.
However, I will say that if you are able to suspend your disbelief, as I was after the first hour, you may end up sort of enjoying this movie for all its over-the-top action and lame acting. Especially if you like Donnie Yen - he was easily the best part of the entire movie. He was so good that I will actually look for his other movies to watch more of him.
Now. onto the cold, hard truth of the matter: This movie is terrible.
Who wants to see a try-hard 50 year-old man acting like an extreme sports nut, trying to "get down with the kids", with his obvious stunt-double and lame CGI stunts, with his jean shorts, and lame tattoos? Nobody, that's who! It's Secondhand embarrassment to the Nth degree.
You wanna know who is a badass? Somebody who doesn't need to try hard - they just have 'it'. Do you know who isn't a badass in this movie? Vin Diesel/ Xander Cage. With every cheesy line he delivers with a smirk, you can just tell it was carefully crafted to just make the audience think "wow, he's so cool". The only problem is that it has the complete opposite effect. It's like seeing your embarrassing old uncle, who still thinks he's as cool as he was two decades ago, and a hit with the younger crowd. He's not, and neither is Vin Diesel - we just tolerate it because it's too embarrassing for us to say anything - well I'm saying it. It's so cringe-worthy and hard to watch. Stop it Vin Diesel, you were meant to be better than this! How could you regress so much in your acting that you look like you just started last year?
You can tell that Vin Diesel (as the producer) and the studio were planning on making this into a mega blockbuster, with a big ensemble cast, much like Vin's other franchise (Fast & Furious) - they were probably hoping to make hundreds of millions of dollars in the process, spawning spin-offs and nine more sequels that nobody asked for or wants to watch.
Ghostbusters (2016)
Entertaining, but forgettable.. and sexist.
I enjoyed Spy.. I also loved The Heat and Bridesmaids. So I am not another one of those men who hates leading women or can't think they are funny.
I paid extra to watch it in 3D and the Dbox (the seat that moves with the action). It still wasn't enough to save the movie. I am not a hater. I obviously paid my hard earned money in order to be entertained.
Chris Hemsworth saved the movie. I just find it ironic that it took a man, who is not even a comedian to get all the laughs in the movie. But the 4 leading women did not get any laughs from the audience.
The effects were top notch and I enjoyed the action sequences and my rumbling D-box and 3D gimmicks made up for the bad movie that it was. If I watched it in 2D, there would be no saving it.
Kristen Wiig was genuinely good in this movie and brought some heart and emotion to the character. She was doing her best to do a good job, but the rest of the actresses seemed to be trying so hard to be funny and quirky and it just came off as lame and ultra cringe. The biggest offender of this was Kate McKinnon - she was trying WAY too hard to be funny and quirky. It seemed so forced.
Nothing about the movie felt epic or larger than life. Nobody in the theater laughed at any of the ladies trying to be funny, but they laughed at Chris Hemsworth's character, who was genuinely funny.
My biggest gripe; Every man in this movie is portrayed in this movie as incompetent, a creep, or dumb. There is not a single male character in here that a young boy can look up to. Yet another disturbing trend on today's culture where people feel a need to make men look bad in order to elevate women. You know its possible to show strong, independent women without having to put men down.