Change Your Image
tristanb-1
Reviews
Silent Rage (1982)
probably Chuck Norris's best movie
Ahh Silent Rage.. I saw this in the theatre when it first came out. I think I was about ten and it scared the pants off me.
All in all, probably Norris's best. this is actually a "real" film. Not just chop socky dressed up with in a story. Basically, it's a genuine horror movie (and a scary one at that) that happens to feature Chuck Norris.
A group of scientists create a living zombie out of a madman. Living zombie then goes on a day-long rampage with Chuck Norris trying to stop him.
Film has a lot going for it. The opening 5-10 minutes are striking and somewhat disturbing (and totally without Norris), as we see an everyman make a desperate last call to his psychiatrist, complaining that he is "losing it". The man's face is pitiful and fearsome at the same time.
The opening ten minutes is a single, very complicated shot that follows that man around the house, watches him for a while, watches other people, then shows the man finally lose, snap for good and go on a terrifying killing spree.
Film generates a great deal of tension through silence and hand-held camera work. Often we actually feel a sense of dread for Chuck Norris!! Film's weaknesses are some dialogue is weak and Norris's acting could be better.
American Playhouse: True West (1984)
Fantastic adaptation of one of Shepard's most mainstream plays
I first saw this in college. I read the play first and was very entranced by it. Shepard's writing is hypnotic. This is actually one of his most naturalistic plays.
I was very curious to see what the film would be like and, needless to say, I was completely floored. Sinise and (especially) Malkovich are INCREDIBLE. You will not see acting like this in another movie or TV show, I promise. It is totally out on a limb - hilarious and frequently scary.
In one scene Malkovich is desperately looking for a pencil and can't find one and he (literally) rips a kitchen apart looking. The whole thing is unhinged to the max.
There are parts that will make you burst out laughing and others that are genuinely frightening. It's very hypnotic. Do yourself a favor and check it out.
highly recommended
Death Drug (1978)
almost impossible to describe - has a strange pull
There are movies/works of art that are *about* drugs, movies/works of art that make you *wish you were on* drugs, and then there are movies/works of art that make you feel like you *are on* drugs.
Of the last (extremely rare) variety I can for certain put the following:
-early Butthole Surfers music -artwork of Jim Woodring -Hindu chanting -artwork of Renee French -early Ween
To this short list must go go "Death Drug". Why or how this film achieves this level or pure, blissed-out, dementia-soaked, head-spinning weirdness is beyond me.
How they managed to make this movie so simultaneously lame that it nearly defies categorization and so other-worldly weird that it nearly achieves freak-out level is something one needs to see to experience.
Put simply - Philip Michael Thomas (of Miami Vice fame) made this crappy anti-PCP movie in the late 70s. Then, in the mid-80s, apparently as a way to make a buck, he dug the thing up and inserted footage (clearly from 80s) that is supposedly part of the movie.
He also puts in intro and outro's of himself (dressed in his flashy Miami Vice duds) talking about how proud he is of the movie. but he appears to be improvising what he's saying and he takes this HUGE pauses while talking. IT's just weeeeiiiiiiirrrrrrrrd.
Anyway, you must see this movie. Find it and watch it and experience. You must experience Death Drug now. It's the wack, baby!!!
Hei tai yang 731 (1988)
Disturbing and upsetting film (though I've seen worse)
Well, here it is. The grand Mother of them all. The sicko "historical drama" that puts Caligula to shame (truly). It's hilarious the way these films hide behind the "we're just unearthing the hypocrisy of what happened" while butchering animals alive on camera and (yuck) performing real autopsies in mouth-watering close-up.
Not a shred of malice do they let slip through their fingers. Man, do these guys have something against the Japanese or what?! They probably do have a point. the biological experiments perpetrated were vile and wrong and deserved punishment.
But is the answer showing a young boy's corpse being sliced and diced (for real) and then having the actors laugh like bad thespians over the freshly excised organs and declare "lets go out for drinks!".
I admit my own hypocrisy. Being truthful, I am proud to have sat through this film, but I don't think it wields the bleak power of Cannibal Holocaust.
It doesn't have anything unwatchable like the scene in Mountain of the Cannibal God where the monkey is swallowed by the python, or like in Cannibal Holocaust where the guy gets his you know what sliced off.
The corpse in the infamous decompression chamber scene was a real guy acting (one of the principal actors, in fact), not a cadaver and the scene where the woman has the skin peeled off her arms is unsettling to be sure, but not hideous.
The film is rough going, make no mistake. But sometimes it seems like a shoddy Cat 3 drama with some especially sickening special effects thrown in.
Kind of like if Bloodsucking Freaks had some historical context.
See it if you're curious. And if you're a film buff gore hound, of course, you can't be in the club if you don't watch it.
The Mask (1961)
Beautiful film
Wonderful movie. First I have seen from this time period (aside from "The Incredible Shrinking Man") that actually scared me.
A psychiatrist gets addicted to an alternate reality that can be entered by putting on an ancient mask. Trouble is it slowly renders the wearer insane.
I wholeheartedly disagree with the majority of viewers here who say the non-3-d sequences are dull. I found them entertaining and well acted. The whole thing can certainly be read as a metaphor for drug use.
The actual 3-D isn't that great (it isn't like things are thrust out at the viewer). It looks more vaguely 3-D. But the sequences themselves are fascinating and weird and demand repeated viewings.
I think the really striking aspect of this film is the sound design. It truly was ahead of its time. I can't think of another film that makes such mesmerizing, hypnotic use of sound design. I'd be curious to know how they did it.
Sounds are slowed down to a throbbing groan, echoes reverberate in and out and a sonic thumping pounds every time someone gets ready to put on the mask. Just listen to the voice-over when the suicide note is read (doctor's patient).
I love it. Watch it. I watched scenes again and again after my first viewing.
La tumba de los muertos vivientes (1982)
not bad zombie flick skimps on the horror somewhat
After "Shock Waves" I decided I was a fan of Nazi zombie movies and immediately bought this, even though many reviews warned not to expect a Shock Waves-like film. They were right.
A small group of folks descends upon an oasis looking for a lost shipment of gold being protected by living dead nazi's.
Film actually isn't that bad. the non-horror scenes are very well staged and the whole thing has a compact feel to it. It never drags and I was never bored. Problem is the scare scenes are few and far between. For a horror flick this sure has a lot of exposition! Soundtrack is this dirge-like organ music that drones and moans endlessly, though it grew on me after a while.
The nazi's themselves are kind of pathetic. Skinny dirty guys in ratty clothes. The make-up looks like paper machie stuck to someone's face (probably is).
There is a moment where a zombie hand reaches out of the sand (we see it in close-up), but there's no make-up on the hand! It's just a hand! (it makes you realize that half of what makes a zombie movie good is effective make-up).
On the plus side, the film has atmosphere to spare. There are some lovely shots of the desert and the final zombie attack is SUPER cool. The zombies walking slowly over the dunes, back-lit by the setting sun. Awesome! Very cool stuff. If only there were more parts like this.
I will watch this film again. But it is no shock waves.
The Child (1977)
One heck of a weird movie about a bad seed child
I think you have to be a film nut to really appreciate a movie like this. And I mean that in the best way possible. We film addicts have a tendency to think of ourselves as a special breed (though I'm sure many think of us as simply "special").
In a lot of ways this is actually a very interesting, unusual and fascinating film. Basically a young female tutor/nanny treks out into the middle of nowhere to take care of a little girl who lives in a huge house in the country.
Odd things happen, leading the nanny to believe the little girl is possessed or can control zombies or *something* (it's never completely clear what the little girl's powers are).
The whole movie never strays far from the house and I think there are a total of about five actors in the whole freakin thing. It looks like it was shot by a bored college student while on summer break using relatives for actors.
but there ARE snippets of real fascination here. the camera work is consistently quirky and interesting and the sound track is submerged in an ultra-weird sonic sponge that's somewhat freaky at first.
the main female actor is good. the little actress who plays the bad seed child has a striking face that can be both charming and malevolent, but she's mostly wooden.
As it goes on however, the film unfortunately loses some of its narrative drive. but I am glad I bought this and I sure enjoyed it more than a piece like Matrix Reloaded.
It's too bad the director never made another movie, I would have liked to see what he could do with more.
If nothing else, this was the first movie I ever saw where a little girl got an axe buried in her face at the end (have to admit I burst out laughing)
Shock Waves (1977)
A mini horror masterpiece from the 70s
One of my two favorite unsung cult horror films from the 70s (the other being Bob Clark's fantastic "Deathdream").
It springs from a great premise: at the end of WWII, Nazi's breed a core of Super Soldiers (the Toden Corps - "death corps") who can breathe underwater and are incredibly strong and bloodthirsty.
But the corps is disbanded when the Nazi's find they cannot control them in battle - the super soldiers just attack anything and anyone.
So, they are shipped off in a boat to await further instructions. Then, the war ends, the boat crashes, and the Toden Corps are essentially stranded on this deserted tropical island.
Fast forward several decades and a group of skin divers are shipwrecked on the island - well, you get the rest. They are menaced by the Toden Corps who move in and around the water, submerging and emerging slowly like watery ghosts, killing anything in sight.
The amazing thing is - it works!!!!! The movie works. It's low budget, but hot damn, if the whole thing doesn't just work like a charm.
The tropical atmosphere and slightly grainy cinematography blend together gorgeously. Many of the shots of the waterlogged Toden Corps are cast in daylight, but somehow it gives the film an eerie, washed-out quality.
Another reviewer commented on the quality of the music and I have to agree that I find it excellent. A sort of 70s synth score heavily rooted in industrial sonic sludge (check out the opening "waaa-waaa-waaa" that plays during the funky, hurt your eyes orange-tinted title sequence).
Performances are all on the money. The one that really stands out is Peter Cushing, and God bless the man. He looks like a damn skeleton, but he moves well, has good energy, and really puts a lot into the part. Nice job.
All in all a winner. Check it out!
Happy Birthday to Me (1981)
weak thriller is nearly a complete waste of time
It's hard to believe this was directed by the same guy who made "Cape Fear" and the wonderful "Tiger Bay". But yes, here it is in all its glorious stupidity.
In the wake of Friday the 13th we saw a tidal wave of "And Then There Were None" style slasher flicks involving a)an unseen predator b)nubile teens with a predilection for sex and partying c)numerous gory deaths shown in loving detail of the aforementioned teens.
"Happy Birthday to Me" could hardly be called the worst of these ("Slumber Party Massacre" anyone?), although it still sucks.
Melissa Sue Anderson (the blind girl from Little House on the Prairie), she of the cool, translucent blue eyes is Ginny, a troubled high school student recovering from a mysterious accident she has no memory of.
Ginny runs with the popular crowd who are obnoxious in the extreme and it seems someone has decided to off the members of the popular crowd one-by-one in various and unusual ways (death by shishkebob probably being the best).
The film is interesting for one reason: it could be my imagination but the plot of Scream seems very similar to this. Popular kids with a jokey attitude toward death being picked off by an unseen killer, the main character is a girl troubled by the recent violent death of her mother - a girl living in a large house in a wooded area (sound familiar?).
Other than these similarities, the film offers very little. It does garner some interest in the early stages. We genuinely want to know what happened with Ginny's mysterious accident. Is she the killer or not? But the resolution is depressingly contrived and stupid. In fact, most everything in the film is contrived and stupid. The characters are maddeningly illogical.
At one point a character sneaks into Ginny's bedroom and steals some of her underwear. He later reveals that he was he one who stole them by pulling the underwear out of his shirt and dangling them in her face. How does she react? Yelling and screaming? Hitting him? No, she pouts and walks away like it was an everyday occurrence.
The film is also not scary in the slightest. There's nothing even vaguely scary about it. Nothing. The big revelation at the end is hopelessly static. It should be seething with tension. Instead it just lies there, inert. Ugh.
Total bore-fest. Do yourself a favor and rent anything other than this movie. Stupid premise. And the characters who aren't annoying are dull.
also, what is Glenn Ford doing in this movie?
Friday the 13th (1980)
wonderfully scary and effective horror
I wish horror fans would give the original Friday the 13th (part 1) a break. People who like schlock tend to like the whole series, but horror elitists have a tendency to dislike them lump them into a single crap-heap.
Unfair, I say! The first film is an excellent little thriller (better than most, in fact). Spare and naturalistic. Essentially a no-frills job that at no-time telegraphs any of the major shocks (the elderly lady as the killer, Jason leaping out of the lake at the end).
It ingeniously places its young victims in a remote area, cut-off from any kind of help. This makes it much more realistic than something like Halloween (for God's sake, they're in the middle of a suburban neighborhood!!).
It is also less derivative than Halloween, which is clearly a rip on Black Christmas. Some say Friday the 13th was inspired by Bava's "Bay of Blood", however I see Agatha Christie's "And then there were None" as the more logical ancestor.
It also does a beautiful job of earning the tension it shows off in the last 20-25 minutes. In particular, the wire-taut unbroken shot of Adrienne King making coffee (her eyes like saucers) and pacing slowly around the cabin is marvelously effective.
Mark my words, in 5-10 years the 1st Friday the 13th will be singled out from the rest as a mini horror work of art (at least a very influential one).
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)
horror film or transcendental excursion?
Look carefully. Watch this film. If you don't see - watch it again. If again you don't see - wait several years. Then watch yet again.
Finally, you will see.
Texas Chainsaw Massacre is not just a horror film about a group of Texas kids who take a wrong turn and end up as food for a freaky family of rural flesh-eaters.
Yes, it is a beautiful film. Filled with poetic images of terror. And if you don't believe poetry can be terrifying try reading Harry Crosby.
This film is something else entirely. It is a sonic meditation on the texture of evil. It spins round and round like a ball in hazy textures of fire and grime and doesn't stop till the very last frame is still.
Never has the face of the devil been so human. And never has pain been so close to catharsis.
Watch. And watch again.
And if you don't see it - look again.
Mommie Dearest (1981)
Probably the greatest movie in the history of cinema
Mommie Dearest is not just the greatest piece of over the top hyperbolic autofiction, it is the greatest film ever - period.
Based on Christina Crawford's coffin-kicking book, film traces her adoption by golden age film star Joan Crawford, through hideous abuse she suffered at her mother's hands.
How can you not love Faye Dunaway in kabuki make-up and baby-doll clothing with shoulder pads like speed bumps, terrorizing a nine-year old.
As Crawford, Dunaway hits high notes Shakespeare could only dream about. And the infamous "wire hanger" scene is like watching an Aztec fire god perform King Lear.
If you ever need a good jolt of horror, and you're not afraid to chuckle, this one will make your day.
On a serious note, everyone involved in this film is very talented and they have all gone on to wonderful careers (this may have sidelined Dunaway's career briefly, but no way could it ruin it) and director Frank Perry has made some fantastic films otherwise ("David and Lisa", "Last Summer")
The Centerfold Girls (1974)
excellent exploitation flick.
Superb exploitation nasty. I loved this one. Real dirty and gritty and fast moving. Well-directed with some nice performances.
Andrew Prine is perfectly cast as a saddle-shoe-wearing nerd who is out to "save" all the calender/pin-up girls he can ("save" as in split their head open with a razor). And he really goes about his business. With his ultra-skinny physique and creepy/quirky demeanor he projects kind of a low-rent Norman Bates quality.
Film has three (or is it four?) different stories, each following a girl that Prine is tracking down. The killing is ruthless and quick and somewhat unsettling. Also unsettling is that the girls bounce from one horrific situation to the other like pinballs (ALL the men in this movie are creeps - and most of the women, too!!!).
If you get a chance, and if exploitation with a sharp-edge is your bag check this one out, you might like it.
Dead of Night (1974)
superior horror/shock film from talented cult director Bob Clark
Excellent spooky variation on "Monkey's Paw" really plays on deep emotions in a crude (but effective) manner.
Low-budget, but fast-moving and scary. This is one of my favorites.
A distraught mother "wishes" her deceased Vietnam soldier-boy son home only to discover he isn't quite who he was when he left.
Many different horror archetypes (zombies, vampirism, cannibalism) are touched on without being confirmed, which makes the film that much more effective.
The film is also a sharp and dark commentary on the state of the returning GI. Andy sits for hours in his dazed "zombie-like" state and stares at the walls. He becomes violent and acts irrational. Many symptoms of post-traumatic shock syndrome.
Written by Alan Ormsby, who also collaborated with Clark on "Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things" and would later go on to pen Paul Schrader's remake of "Cat People".
If you're looking for another solid Bob Clark spook-fest, check out "Black Christmas" (which bears an eerie similarity to the original "Halloween", though it predates it by several years!!) before "Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things".
Many have commented on the *shocker* ending. If you are expecting something along the lines of the original "Carrie" - something to make you jump out of your seat - you will be disappointed.
The ending is more dour and stunning. I didn't see it coming, but it made perfect sense in line with everything that had happened. It's the kind of ending that a film would never have now. It's simply too honest. One of the better horror endings I've seen, actually.
Threads (1984)
amazing - petrifying - depressing film about nuclear war
made during the heat of the iron curtain/80s cold war/nuclear sword era (which now seems so long ago - but not nearly far enough), "Threads" takes you step-by-meticulous-step through a human engineered apocalypse as seen through the eyes of a small blue collar British town.
We begin with some foreign diplomacy "chest-bumping" in the middle east through jittery threats and skirmishes between the US and the Soviets through grave voices announcing on TV that "talks have broken down" and angry anti-nuke demonstrations.
Finally, the inevitable happens. Special f/x during this sequence are a little shoddy but the overall effect is pummeling. There's a long sequence when the bomb has just hit when we hear nothing but the terrible rumbling and screams and then suddenly - there is a long flash of white and silence, only silence. It seems to last forever. It's truly terrifying. You realize they really have done it.
Then the film takes the viewer (documentary style all the way) through the first dreadful days, then weeks (people dying off like flies), months, finally years.
Things get (as expected) more and more depressing. We see how with the breakdown of the "threads" that hold society -and us as a community and a people- together (hospitals, communications systems, education systems, commerce - basically all the stuff we take for granted) people become animals.
That's the strongest and most disturbing idea I think one can glean from the film is how when the "threads" are destroyed people essentially are shoved back down the food chain. We become animals again.
The last fifteen minutes of the film, although certainly not the most violent part, are unbelievably despairing.
I would have this be required viewing in all high schools. It should be.