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Reviews
Left Behind (2014)
Red Card Cagey Boy
OK So i am going to tell you a Little Secret, No think I will leave it until the end,
So Mr Cage what the hell was this pile of Monkey Nuts? Have you gone the same way as so many other Hollywood actors that you are that famous and have that much money that you don't care what you bang out any more? You SIr owe a hour and a half back of my life you time waster. Always watched any film with Mr Cage and they have always been good so when i was looking at a very very poor story line, terrible acting rotten props bad bad scenes and graphics that looked like they had been made 30 years ago with rubber planes bouncing on roads I thought I was drunk, i wish i had been maybe i wouldn't remember this Tossh. It becomes clear about 3 quarters of they way through that the only thing that mattered to the director was getting the Bible Bashing message across and cods-wallop with the quality of the film -IT SUCKS BIG TIME , even worse it starts out giving you hope sitting there thinking 'hmmmm this looks OK' But its not. Note the directors name and NEVER watch anything they make ever ever again, Mr Cage-Red Card get off.
Ohh Yes the secret, shhhh There is no god and if there was hes made a hell of a mess of my planet and if he moves in mysterious ways he need to stop arseing about and sort things out and if he isn't powerful enough to then I ain't going to worship him' ssshhhhh.
Zombie Hunter (2013)
Bag of Horse Cr*&
OK I hardly ever write reviews but for this I have to, This has to be the WORST film i have ever seen for so many reasons Zombie film usually rock but this was just rotten so so so bad i feel ripped off because it actually has the ingredients to be a great film its like they wanted to make it bad. First it has 1 half big name in it Danny Trejo so you think it might be good, WRONG IT SUCKS, he gets wasted after a C%$p small part by a very very fake CGI monster. And then there are 2 very fit babes in it, 1 with big bangers who wants to bang everyone AND THEY KILL HER OFF, Man come on she was the only thing worth looking at. Plot stunk they obviously tried to make a cult film Tarantino type but ended up making a bag of Cr*p, don't waste your time in fact if you hate someone then buy them this as a present, Director K. King GIVE UP YOUR DAY JOB...