ShaMana999 Reviews

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds: Subspace Rhapsody (2023) Season 2, Episode 9

When you think it can't get worse, there is this episode...

[1/10 · 5 August 2023]

I won't provide spoilers, it's barely watchable. I'll mention just the intro, recap. What they consider previously worthy. It's a 100% who kissed who. This is THE most interesting thing to recap from a sci-fi Star Trek show. There aren't any Strange New Worlds. There is barely any exploration in this show. There are barely any characters.... Episodes follow a shallow narrative structure, that is made a joke by any decently written show. Problems aren't solved by a crew, but individuals stumbling upon the solution. The only redeeming quality of this, are visuals. A pretty penny is spent on episode visuals, where they would have more benefited of doing better writing work.

They've had two "joke" episodes in a row, and both are pretty bad.

PS: Spock actor has a neat voice... Do as you please with this information...

A Quiet Place (2018)

It's a tale old as time

[3/10 · 29 July 2022]

This movie is the tale of a few screenwriters, that had a good idea, but when implementing it, could figure out how to make it a little more than a shallow gimmick...

It shows us a family of a various number, that raises such a shocking ammount of noise, doing anything, that I couldn't figure, for the love of god, why the hell aren't they simply talking. They live in a wide open WOODEN house, rather then in an sound isolated studio, or even better, one of the million concrete bunkers that exist in the country. They have a few children, to which they don't seem to give any care for, except for when only the plot demands it. Being constantly left on their own devices, children do what children do. Stupid things. They seem to have electricity, somehow. How in this post apocalyptic world, where only a few are alive, it's probably the biggest mystery around.

The threat is provided from a biological being, that hunts on noise alone. It's fast, and always appears from the camera operators behind. It acts no more intelligent than an animal. The creatures couldn't penetrate a car roof after some effort, so hardened metals should be fine against them, but for what ever magic, they are not.

My favorite bit, was at the end, when the family child realized "hey, a hyper sensitive creature to sound, probably doesn't like a certain range of sounds", and then the wife killed it with a regular shotgun... I laughed so hard, and reduced my 5 score to 3, just for the sheer idiocracy of the plot.

I'm sorry, but a competently shot movie, with an interesting gimmick, doesn't make it good one.

Torque (2004)

This movie is SO BAD that it's actually amazing

[8/10 · 28 June 2022]

It's one of these category movies that are so terrible, that end up being quite a fun ride. This movie is one of these. I'm unsure if it was made to be a serious thing, or intentionally shot like a parody movie, but I enjoyed it quite a bit. So cheesy and terrible dialogue, it's great!

Knowing (2009)

Average right up until that end

[8/10 · 13 April 2022]

HEAVY SPOILERS FOR THE ENDING

I'm not going to talk much about the first 1 hour and 40 min. It's more or less an average mystery with some gnarly crash sequences. Actors are fine, the script is serviceable.

That ending though... So the cryptic messages the kids are getting come from some pretty uncaring Aliens. They know the Earth is doomed and wish to save the human race for whatever reason. So they grabbed a pair of 8-9-year-olds (didn't quite get the kids' age) and took em off-planet to a distant somewhere else. All this came packed with a ton of biblical hints sprinkled all around, even beginning with how everything is meaningless and there is no god. Turns out...

God is real, and it's just some Aliens!

What happened? They deposited the children onto that distant planet and buggered off. Leaving them, presumably, having to figure out how to repopulate the planet with other humans. There was even a tree symbolizing the Adam and Eve myth. I love the cynicism in this imagery, and this followed by the Earth burning away, seemed like a great ending.

The Aliens, clearly not caring about the complexity of human survival and on top of that, reproduction, just dumped the children and left them alone. Pretty sure they'll be dead in two weeks, considering the life they are coming from and the survival abilities of modern city folk.

And, to be honest, that would be a perfect description of God (if it existed) as it currently stands in modern evidence, uncaring, not present, and just doing its thing without providing much explanation. It's even reasonably defined, as much as an Alien race is reasonable. If that was the intent, I'll give it 10 out of 10 for its brilliant cynicism.

Shining Vale (2022–2023)

3 eps down and I'm enjoying it quite a bit

[8/10 · 14 March 2022]

Don't really understand the low rating this show gets. It's got a snappy script, well executed by the cast. It is a very classic sorry but embraced in it's fullness. It's a bit silly and a bit serious, but anyone watching it should never forget that this is intended to be silly. I like it and plan to finish the season as it unveils. I don't expect amazing twists and turns, just an enjoyable ride.

Skiptrace (2016)

One punch wonder

[3/10 · 14 December 2021]

As, like there is one decent fight sequence with one actual punch that makes it so. It's an objectively terrible movie. The script is written by a toddler, feels like they went with the what ever the first iteration was. Events, physics, characters, dialogue, non of it makes any remote sense.

I would love it to be mindless fun like many of his other movies, but all the fun is sucked out by cringy acting, uneventful sequences and once again, horrendous dialogue.

Ron's Gone Wrong (2021)

An unfortunate downhill experience

[6/10 · 8 December 2021]

This is a movie with great ups and downs. Starts fairly strong, with the second act being mostly okay and from there on it's all downhill. The whole third act was completely unnecessary and it lowered my score for the movie by quite a bit. The original idea became a cartoonish parody with a dull resolution without any emotional payoff. I get that this targets younger audience but even they would be able to appreciate a slightly deeper story.

Midnight Mass (2021)

A total snooze fest

[3/10 · 6 October 2021]

This can only be described as a big bad of nothing created by people who clearly have no clue how old folk look like.

It's a shockingly basic story that spends too much time on tedious and mundane characters that do nothing but talk in a slow and sluggish manner.

When you FF through 1/4th an episode and it's just one scene of practically nothing to advance the plot, you know something broke in the chain of production.

Loosely connected scenes, lack of continuation from cut to cut, not tension, mystery, or anything else to keep you watching... It's the story of a village containing the most diverse sample size of people looking bored out of their minds. And so will you be.

Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

It is exactly what you expect and it doesn't disappoint

[7/10 · 4 August 2021]

This movie doesn't have a story. There is something shoed in just to have people in it. It does however have massive monsters duking it out and killing probably millions in the process, but who cares... its really cool.

Such movies are not made for the story, but the spectacle. And the spectacle is excellent. They both feel massive, animated spectacularly to great details. The effects are very well executed or as I said at the beginning, this movie gave me exactly what I wanted out of it. No more, no less.

I would love to see more in the future. Monster clashes are an art of its own it seems.

Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard (2021)

Written by a 4 year old

[2/10 · 25 July 2021]

It's over the top but not quite to reach parody levels. It sits in an odd middle ground where it seems unsure to be serious or funny. The plot seems written by a 4 year old. No connection with reality or any sense. The action is not terrible but still uterrly passable. Not sure why this movie exists.

Run Hide Fight (2020)

"Huh" - it's the permanent form of my face for the duration of this combination of images

[2/10 · 22 March 2021]

One question popped constantly in my mind and its "How is that a movie?" My mind was screaming at me to stop wasting my time, but I was wondering is something may happen. No spoiler alert, nothing really happens.

It starts with a confusing bonding scene where I couldn't quite figure out if they are father/daughter or abductor/abductee relationship. What didn't really help is cringe dialogue going from toiler paper napkin material to "where am I, who are you, what are we doing, what's going on" type dementia patients. Exposition is not just presented, it's shoved down your throat by a pair of confused actors.

At this point, the movie watcher in me got really confused, as it seems the movie was shot competently using proper equipment, but the scene it self is straight out of a student movie. Cringy, awkward, overall odd. Sadly this doesn't change going further but only intensifies. Scene after scene, the movie breaks every law of physics, acting and genuine human behavior. Most characters are doing genuinely perplexing thing all over the place. Ranging from failing terribly at running and hiding or provide any opposition over the circumstances they are put in.

It's really hard to describe all this nonsense and not include spoilers. Actually, this movie is so terrible, that I would have to say you gotta see it to believe it.

Irresistible (I) (2020)

It's presented like being slapped with a fish through the face.

[5/10 · 18 March 2021]

I would love to say that this is a thoughtful representation of an incredibly broken system, but it's not that. It is a representation of the said broken system, but it's no more subtle than what I've described in the title.

The point made during the movie, is very much valid. The cast is doing a decent job and Carell is fantastic as usual. Unfortunately it's an incredibly straight forward story that offers little to consider once it's over. The script is just passable, and I hate to say it cause I love Jon Stewart.

Pacific Rim: The Black (2021–2022)

Surely better than the second movie, and a solid addition to the franchise

[7/10 · 17 March 2021]

I was deeply disappointed by the second Pacific Rim movie. It had so many issues that it's hard to describe. Not that one has huge expectations from a movie about giant robots fighting giant monsters, but still. When compared to the first, it's miles behind.

The animation has some pretty low bar to cross and it does it well. It's a light tone mix with some rather very dark elements. It's not always best but it passes the smell test. The animation is okay mostly. Some character models could be better but that's nitpicking. The bigger issues is the supporting voice cast, their performances are pretty low tier sadly. With that said, direction is rock solid. Good camera choices and visual setup. For me, this was one of the worst parts of the second movie.

Still a very much enjoyable experience. I would have liked some more robot action and better voice casts but hey, it's more giant robots fighting giant monsters.

Boss Level (2020)

Shockingly Enjoyable

[8/10 · 16 March 2021]

Mel Gibson movies keep surprising me. This movie is greatly enjoyable, albeit on a very recycled formula. They've changed a few things, shifted motivations a little and it's a pretty decent action flick. The actors are doing a great job... mostly. Not too impressed by Naomi Watts to be honest but, heh. Who cares that much, has pretty solid action after all.

Fatman (2020)

This is a surprising gem

[7/10 · 15 March 2021]

I went in expecting a cheesy Christmas gag with some shooting but got a very original satire that delivers what it promises. It has a plot so absurd its entertaining. Great job done by Mel Gibson.

Jason Bourne (I) (2016)

So... much... shake... im gonna throw up

[3/10 · 8 March 2021]

The movie is a rather unremarkable action thriller following a famed protagonist on yet another quest for answers. It's nothing new, but hey, that's not something too terrible. Obligatory round trip across several European cities, a razor thin plot, just to have something to connect the action.

What makes this movie almost completely unwatchable is the camera direction. This thing doesn't stand still for a single moment. Incredibly short cuts, permanent violent shakes. Many dark scenes where its hard to make one object from another and combined with the lightning fast camera work, it makes for one nauseating experience.

Honest Thief (2020)

This could have easily been a great action movie...

[5/10 · 4 March 2021]

I went in expecting an action flick ala Taken and it started like it. But then some narrative choices ruined the whole thing. It's just terribly disappointing to lose that easy potential. You wish to feel good watching such movie but at the end it tastes all wrong and that's only for a few narrative bits that I won't spoil.

Superman & Lois (2021–2024)

Didn't have much of an expectation but it's good to be pleasantly surprised

[8/10 · 24 February 2021]

First, I love the cinematography and the effort they've put in it. It feels like a feature film and has a solid consistent tone through out. The musical score and emotional pieces are fantastic. It's incredibly well executed for a CW show. I really hope it keeps up with the rest of the episodes.

I've never given Tyler Hoechlin much praise for his acting since the first time he appeared as Superman. But here there is a massive improvement from what he usually shows. Much better acting chops than expected. His co-star plays of nicely. To be honest, in prior shows I never thought they worked but I guess it's all about the direction.

The kids are okay I guess, not much to write there about.

Overall the show follows a stark departure in tone from other CW shows and I love it. It's serious, more mature and well shot. The action sequences in the pilot are spectacular and well executed. I really hope it keeps up.

I don't usually review TV Shows as they are always changing but here I was really impressed. Note the review is written after watching the hour long Pilot only. It doesn't represent the full show.

Exam (2009)

You wait for the payoff till the very end and yet it never comes

[5/10 · 22 February 2021]

Illogical, irrational, uninteresting. This movie tries to be a psychological study of the very basic human condition but sadly falters in almost every way. Mainly hindered by uneven pacing and lack of direction, the movie just strolls along the idea without bothering too much to think about it's surroundings.

It ends not with a bang but a whisper, revealing a predictable minor twist and leaving the viewer with a bad taste in their mouth of the resolution for it's biggest plot point. The characters mostly completely uncompelling, I was hoping for something really better than what we got.

Alone (V) (2020)

In a world of incredible coincidences, a movie exist like all others

[3/10 · 29 January 2021]

This movie offers very little of, well, anything. I've watched it before, you've watched it before, at this point pretty much everyone has watched it before. Offers no surprise, no turns, no intrigue, no suspense, no motivation and most importantly no explanation.

Literally remove any of the one random occurrences in the movie and there won't be a movie. The bad guy always knows exactly where to be and how to be cool and creepy. The good girl always acts inept until the very end where she suddenly transforms in to Rambo. It's so predictable that I'm writing a review for something that I would usually never bother. It's just something not worth watching.

The Old Guard (2020)

Surprisingly disappointing

[4/10 · 25 July 2020]

For some reason I was expecting more. Much more. But what we get is a fairly dull plot, shockingly uninspired action, some mediocre acting and the music is the worst offense of all. The score is simply terrible.

But for real, for an action movie the action is pretty bad. It's slow and lethargic. The pacing seems all over the place. It doesn't do anything to excite you at all. There are far better action movies.

I recommend the Extraction much more. It's still a pretty terrible plot, but the action is top notch there.

A Christmas Carol (2019)

A story told to death but with pretty decent production values in it

[8/10 · 30 January 2020]

A tale told with a lot of style and wonderful music. Good actor performances. What more would you wan't from this story otherwise

Star Trek: Picard (2020–2023)

This is not the Star Trek you remember not the one you expect

[3/10 · 30 January 2020]

The show has some glaring flaws. Visually it's a stunning piece, but storywise, it relies heavily on over expositions to an extent where it becomes extremely artificial. But that's not the biggest issue. This is not what Star Trek should be, nor the characters or the federation. For an extremely short amount of time (roughly 20 years) it seems the federation moved from idealistic utopian society to closed of, bickering, xenophobic gathering of people over night. Everyone projects aprehention, threats are tossed around without a second thought, Picard aims helplessly around the events. There are Romulans around not exhibiting a single established romulan trait. No trace of pride, arrogance, lack of compassion. They are named romulans, have some visual traits and pointy years but other than that are run of the mill humans.

This show is a generic run of the mill sci-fi show, with Patrick Stewart and a boring story. I'm extremely saddened by it

Euphoria (2019– )

This show is a nothing burger

[3/10 · 5 August 2019]

The show barely has any plot. Things are happening only for the show to progress but with no point to them or any coherent drive. The characters are hollow and the plot more shallow than a tiny puddle on a wet street. They do not develop or create any compelling interactions whatsoever. They just move from scene to scene and you see what is happening to them from a mile away. Each scene suddenly forgetting what has happened before.

I give it a 3 only for the excellent cinematography used and music choices. Other than that, it's a total waste of time to watch

xXx: Return of Xander Cage (2017)

Vin Diesels went dream

[2/10 · 14 April 2019]

Its mindless, vfx driven, explosions filled ... snooze fest. Its full to the bone and that's hard to ignore. Don't recommend to anyone.