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District 9 (2009)
Something else...
I liked the first Peter Jackson movies. They were low budget and terribly badly made - and that's what made them funny. I wasn't a big LOTR fan, but given the material he had to make movies from, he did a pretty damn good job. King Kong was just bad - who the hell takes a big ape back to USA when there are f*cking dinosaurs?
So Peter Jackson's movies got worse, but when I saw the trailers for District 9, I was excited. I was hoping for some action, some comedy, and by the looks of it, a portrait of our hostility towards foreigners - in this case aliens, which I saw as a metaphor. This movie delivers none of the above.
The movie starts as a documentary - a bit odd, but potential to be good. Special effects are great, we're all satisfied. The movie goes on and nothing at all happens. As I got impatient and wanted at least some plot, the main character starts turning into an alien and drops his camera. Until this point the movie was a documentary of how the aliens were living and how awfully they were treated. We only saw the aliens when the cameraman (main character) were filming them.
After this point, we still see the damn aliens - now with subtitles, and I've seen you-tube clips with subtitles on little stupid animals that had better dialog than this. The movie turns into an immature and meaningless flick where the main character, who is turning into an alien, tries to fit in with the aliens while fighting the government who wants to run tests on him while he is trying to escape the planet with some aliens. And problems keep on coming; he has a girlfriend who he wants to be with even though he's a f*cking alien - get a grip dude!
So to sum up, this is a documentary that turns into a... Uhm... Not a documentary when the cameraman loses his camera. It has no plot, no meaning, has no action (which is one of the three genres), and it only relates the aliens to foreigners in the beginning - that part goes bye bye with the camera.
I give it 3 stars: 1 for the pretty special effects. 1 for tossing 30 million dollars in the toilet (I wanna do that, and yes it was actually that expensive!) 1 for at least being better than all of Julia Robert's films.
Wanna watch a good sci-fi film with pretty effects? See Star Wars Episode 3 and don't waste time or money on this piece of garbage!
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009)
Harry Potter becomes an immature teen movie!
The movies starts out with Harry visiting the Weasley's, where he's attacked by Death eaters. They play around with some fire and some bad special effects, burn the house and runs away. Probably the best scene in the film. The next 2 hours, the film focuses 100% on Potter wanting the Weasley girl, but she's dating someone else, and Granger wanting Ron Weasley, but he's dating a weirdo, and everybody starts hating each other cause they all love each other. I do not know how it's possible to destroy the entire concept of Harry Potter and the magic world and having it made in to a teen movie where the people who're in love with each other can't say it cause they're too immature, but they succeeded doing it! I sat there for hours, wishing for the movie to end so I could do something less stupid with my time.
The movie is called The Half-Blood Prince, and the only thing the movie has to do with the title is that Harry gets a book that belongs to the half-blood prince, which contains some usable notes. Oh and the 10 second long scene with the prince revealing himself by saying "Yes, I'm the half-blood prince!", and nothing more is added to that.
The ending scene where Dumbledore is making Harry make him drink the elixir is the only place where you see the slightest bit of suspense, and even that scene was cut down to a 5-minute sequence to make room for more boring love-elixir-scenes. After this, death eaters attack dumbledore, but instead of doing something, they stand there for 5 minutes talking.
I have never been this disappointed after going to the cinema, and I'm certainly not going to pay money to see the next Harry Potter movie!
Terminator Salvation (2009)
Best Terminator so far!
I loved T1. Brilliant movie with a great universe. T2 was good as well, with some new breakthrough effects and still the 'great' acting of Arnold. T3 was an insult to the series and should have been cut down to a 20 minute intro to T4. Ever since I saw Terminator for the first time, I was waiting for a Terminator film that would show us how it was to live after judgement day. When T3 came, everybody thought that they were gonna see bleached skulls with giant robots driving over them and hunting down mankind. Everybody got disappointed.
Terminator Salvation delivers everything we have been waiting for since Kyle Reese had flashbacks to the future in 1984 when the first Terminator was released. This movie has the perfect plot. I don't have to explain it, as everybody who has seen the Terminator movies will know what the plot is. Special effects, acting, screenplay, storyline... Everything adds up. After seeing Transformers 2 the other day, T4 delivers the perfect action movie experience. One of the best of it's kind - ever!
Now I'm just crossing my fingers in hope of a trilogy!
Blood Car (2007)
If this is not stupid, I don't know what is...
Blood Car takes place in the near future, say 2 weeks from now. And suddenly gas prices have skyrocketed. And apparently because it costs hundreds of dollars to fill a tank, no one can afford to drive a car. The main character, Archie is a school teacher, who thinks he knows a thing or two about engines. In his attempt to make a functioning engine, he cuts himself on a broken bottle, leaking blood into the tank, making the engine work. After realizing that his engine works on human blood, the rest of the movie is about his chase of this dim witted and ugly girl that wanna bang him cause he has a car, and the government chasing him around. To fill up his tank, he kills random people and puts them into the trunk to fuel the car. That's basically the movie. It's 1 hour and 15 minutes long, and should have lasted 20 minutes tops. At the moment the only thing I'm more angry about than the quality of this movie is the fact that when I start watching a movie, I have to see it to the end. Don't start watching this movie - you'll end up wasting an hour and 15 minutes of your life!
Atonement (2007)
If you got nothing else to do...
... Then I'm pretty sure you still got a good shot at finding something better to do that watching this movie.
I'm a big fan of epic movies with a plot that makes you think for days. Movies that touch you in some way, and in the end makes you wonder about what really happened in the movie. This movie will definitely make you wonder. Not what happened, but why you spent that much time watching it.
Keira Knightley plays her role as good as it can be played. Enough said. Rest of the acting is pretty good as well, but that simply is not enough to carry a movie. The plot simply isn't there. It's basically about a girl who tells a lie and puts her sister's boyfriend to prison. We see incoherent scenes from his years in prison, and then later on we follow him at war. Then he meets his old girl (knightley) again, and they get together. That's mainly the plot in this movie. There's nothing epic, nothing new in this movie.
The only reason I could think of makes people think is that it constantly jumps in time. It sees everything from two angles, which is pretty annoying if you ask me. First we see something through the eyes of one person, then the exact same scene through another person's eyes. Now, if you want to see shitloads of boring scenes, go watch Dirty Dancing. If you want to see just as many boring scenes - twice - then watch this movie...
I'll give it 3 stars for the good acting, and well... Even though they failed miserably at making a good movie, at least they tried.
Tigerland (2000)
Another film saved by Colin Farrell
Tigerland is not much of a war movie. The plot could have been anything. Nothing really original. But somehow it's really deep. Maybe it is the part of Roland Bozz (Colin Farrell) trying to be different; being helpful towards his friend, being an asshole towards the sergeants, and most of all being human. I don't know what makes the script so good - I just know that without Colin Farrell it would have been a whole different movie.
This is a very good drama, and it is surely one you won't forget easily. However it may lack a bit of action.
Just like in Phone Booth where his superior acting creates a great movie!
I give it 7 of 10
Pulp Fiction (1994)
The best film by Quentin Tarantino. Really a masterpiece!
Pulp fiction is a story about the two gangsters, Vincent Vega (John Travolta) and Jules Winnfield (Samuel L. Jackson). At the same time it is about the boxer Butch Coolidge (Bruce Willis). The two separate stories get mixed up with a couple of other stories, and some people might find this confusing, but it isn't - it's brilliant! The story jumps in time, and that is why a dead guy can be alive in the next scene. The movie is driven by extremely well written dialogues, and the acting is really great performed.
Either you love this movie or you hate it. Most people love it. If you hate it, see it again! I give it 8/10
Little Nicky (2000)
Great and underrated movie!
This is no doubt one of Adam Sandlers better movies! I don't understand why the average vote is so low in here. Everyone i know who have seen this movie loved it. And so did I.
Adam Sandler plays Nicky, who is the son of the devil. The devil isn't such a bad guy afterall, but his two oldest sons are, and after deciding that he himself shall be the ruler of hell for the next 10000 years, Adrian and Cassius (the two oldest sons) travel to earth to mess everything up. This stops the gate to hell, which leads to a slow and painful death of the Devil. Nicky is sent to earth to stop his brothers, and on this journey through the world of the living, Nicky discovers the magic of love, weed and heavy metal. It's a hilarious story, and it shouldn't be missed! 8/10
Wing Commander (1999)
Great game, miserable movie!
The movie Wing Commander is based on the video game series of the same name. The game had a great story and was really popular at the time. I have only tried Wing Commander: Prophecy, and therefore I don't know much about the story in the earlier games in the Kilrathi saga. The movie takes place many years before the story in Prophecy. It is based on and old legend from the game; Christopher Blair. In the game Blair (played by Mark Hamill) saves the main character (you), Lt. Caseys life near the end of the game. In the movie, Blair (played by Freddie Prinze Jr.) is the main character and we follow his young days.
*SPOILER* The plot in the movie sucks badly. We only get to hear a bit about Blair and his family, and that no one believes in him. Then he has like 10 minutes in the end of the movie to prove them wrong... Action starts (after like an hour), and then we see these REALLY crappy animated Kilrathi alien dudes. They look like stopmotion animations. Then we get 10 minutes action, then some dude dies, then the movie ends - bravo! Blair just saved earth! *SPOILER*
Terrible movie! My vote: 3! 1 for the fine choice of actors 1 for just making a movie as a follow up on the great games 1 for the small amount of action
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001)
Most likely the most funny movie I've ever seen!
Jay and Silent Bob appear in quite a lot of movies. It all started with Clerks, then movies like Mall Rats and Chasing Amy. They even appeared in Scream 3. "Dick and fart jokes, that only stoners laugh at." - that is how they describe their humor, but then again - most of the world would be bored stoners then. When I first saw Mall Rats, I was fascinated by the extremely funny characters, Jay and Silent Bob - and then whtn I found out that they just made their own movie, I simply HAD to get it! It's the best in the series of movies in the same universe with the same people. The movies doesn't have a lot in common, except Jay and Silent Bob and the great humor that Kevin Smith (Silent Bob) puts into his movies as the director of all the Jay and Silent Bob movies. Now when more and more people start to enjoy the movies with Jay and Silent Bob, famous actors like Ben Affleck (Good Will Hunting, Phantoms), Matt Damon (Good Will Hunting, The Bourne films, Saving Private Ryan), Shannon Elizabeth (American Pie), Will Farrell (Saturday Night Live, A Night At The Roxbury), Ali Larter (Final Destination, American Outlaws), Seann William Scott (American Pie, Road Trip), George Carlin (Stand-up comedian), Carrie Fisher (Star Wars), Mark Hamill (Star Wars), Jason Biggs (American Pie), James Van Der Beek (Dawson's Creek) and many more are joining in, just to have a small role in the movie. By the way, check out The Passion of the Clerks - another movie with Jay and Sileny Bob. To be released this year.