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patientjoel
Reviews
King Arthur (2004)
Loved this as a teenager
When I first watched this film as a teenager, I loved it. Having just watched it again over a decade later, I have a very different opinion.
The set design is often atrocious, tin-pot even; for example, many of the 'stone' walls are clearly cardboard.
Almost every actor, some of whom are amazing in other movies - I mean, come on, Mads Mikkelsen is a legend in After the Wedding and The Hunt and arguably still second best to Keira Knightley in this one - are made to look as wooden as B-movie actors.
Literally every single character is an obvious stereotype, there is zero nuance.
It is great how each knight has their own style of fighting, but it's executed in such a heavy-handed way, it hardly adds anything to the film.
I would love to see this film's storyline remastered by a proper, respected screenwriter.
Carmen (2022)
Wonderful little hidden gem
A feel-good little film detailing how little sprinklings of humaneness and liberalism can overcome systemic failures in society and the church.
The film is the journey of the titular character traversing from being stifled for many decades to discovering how to be happy once again.
The ending is seemingly deliberately unrealistically over-optimistic, and that's the point. It is a film designed to lift one's spirits and see the good in the world again.
While certainly not for everyone - for example, it won't be for those who like only realistic dramas and those who strongly adhere to the stringent side of Catholicism - personally, I feel in love with it.
It doesn't overstay its welcome and has a few laugh-out-loud moments too, especially in the opening third. Recommended.
Memory (2022)
Skip it
One of the worst movies I've ever seen.
Acting, set design, script, the lot; everything is lacking realism and quality.
Not a single character has any nuance or credibility. Stereotypes and sexism abound. The reputation of everyone involved in this debacle took a real hit.
While I do struggle to imagine anyone enjoying this, looking at other reviews, some did somehow. I guess b-movie action fans would find some enjoyment, but even most die hard Liam Neeson fans won't enjoy it.
Really, do yourself a favour and choose a different movie. There are plenty of other brainless action movies which still manage to entertain.
The Last Bus (2021)
Disappointingly contrived
As soon as a heard "British drama starring Timothy Spall", I knew I had to see this film! Even the great Mr. Spall couldn't save this one, though.
Nice little true story, well acted by Spall as always, but the film itself was incredibly contrived and unrealistic. While artistic licence is fine, believability is key and was often totally missing here.
Full of stereotypes, the narrative arc was as predictable as can be the whole film through, to the extent as soon as a scene started, or a new character appeared, you could predict what was going to happen.
Overall, 'disappointing' is the word that sums it up best for me.
I Am Richard Pryor (2019)
Amazing person, life and story, not a good documentary
Amazing person, life and story, but this isn't a good documentary. There's far too much inane babble and far too little from the man himself.
It's all, "then Richard did this" and "then Richard did this" and "then this happened to Richard". The guy's life is such an amazing story, it's disappointing this documentary is, quite frankly, boring.
I hope a different production manages both to capture the essence of Mr. Pryor and entertain the audience because this one does not.
X (2022)
Twisted, oh so twisted
Quite twisted - and that's no understatement - but kind of sensational too.
A modern genre-defining, soon-to-be classic.
Exploitation horror at it's finest, though it'll no doubt get a lot of hate from some.
The Double (2013)
So much promise, so little end product.
Even though I'm a huge fan of both Dostoevsky & Ayoade and I thought Eisenberg's performance here was top notch, the film itself often failed to hold my attention.
There was so much promise - great storyline, awesome but subtle lead acting - but it just failed to deliver.
The last 20 minutes of the film should have been captivating, but the film had long since lost my interest.
Mia Wasikowska's performance was solid and it was nice to see Christopher Morris, Chris O'Dowd (both of The IT Crowd fame), Noah Taylor & Wallace Shawn, but I thought Tim Key's performance was atrocious and totally out of sync with Eisenberg's sublime subtlety.
In the end, I was left with the feeling that I hope someone else covers Dostoevsky's novel and does a better job as this one failed to deliver.
Licorice Pizza (2021)
A disjointed Tarantinoesque farce
Underwhelming, unspectacular, overrated and incredibly disjointed.
Reminded me of Tarantino's 'Once Upon a Time... In Hollywood'; disjointed, popular, quite unpredictable, but ultimately fails to hit the spot.
Alana Haim plays her hard-to-like character well, but Hoffman fails to impress and the vast majority of other characters are hideously underdeveloped.
Together (2021)
Quite simply the best relationship film I have ever seen
Had me enthralled; laughing and crying along with the characters. There's so much subtle depth, it's unreal. Sharon Hogan & James McAvoy's quality of acting is absolute top class. McAvoy dominates the early scenes and then, Hogan comes into her own.
Looking at the imdb average rating, it's clearly not for all, but for me, it's in my top 20 films ever and I'm speaking as a movie buff.
Kesari (2019)
Racist & sexist - a great piece of history deserves more
The battle of Saragarhi is understandably considered a proud piece of Sikh history. 21 soldiers courageously fought against thousands of enemy soldiers. Such an act of bravery deserves a better depiction than this film.
The film's storyline is sexist, racist and anti-Islamic. Modern filmmakers should be held to a higher account and this piece of history deserved a much more rounded story.
The film had a good of sense of humour and it was heart-warming and refreshing to see Sikhs betrayed as warriors and heroes. It remains hard to ignore the film's betrayal of all non-Sikhs, though.
Also, women were reduced to a stereotypical gender role that yes, may have existed in the 1890s, but surely shouldn't be reinforced by modern Bollywood, or any other film producers for that matter.
It would be amazing to see this piece of history portrayed in a way not so biased and discriminatory.
Underworld (2003)
Interesting to rewatch this after nearly 20 years
Loved how the movie didn't try to explain centuries of history in the first half hour, but put the viewer straight into the here & now and proceeded to just drip-feed information pertinent to the storyline.
Casting-wise, Sophia Myles & Michael Sheen appeared perfect choices, while initially Bill Nighy seemed a ludicrous choice but ended up chewing the scenery to acquisition. The leads all did a good job without truly shining.
The script forced upon Bobbie Gee is problematic by modern standards and thank goodness times are changing.
Cinematography and storyline were both fair to middling.
Ultimately satisfying and entertaining, as modern vampires vs werewolf movies go it's little wonder this one hit the right buttons and was the start of a successful franchise.
The Trip to Greece (2020)
Coogan & Brydon have a fan in me
I readily admit I was already a fan of the WILTY host and Alan Partridge actor. Ten laugh out loud moments in the first twenty minutes basically had me as an immediate fan of this film. As it dragged on though, the laughs dried up and watching almost became frustrating and strangely, I think that was deliberate. An allegory of the actors' supposed lives if you will. Heading for a 9/10 for me at the start, but ultimately a 7 seems about right.
Old (2021)
A magical allegory let down by its ending
The majority of the story was wonderful, a magical allegory for life itself. The characters realised things in hours it takes us decades to fathom.
The film was let down by its finale and exactness, but nonetheless it remains totally memorable.
Highly recommended for its uniqueness, if nothing else.
Irresistible (2020)
WOW. This is the best political satire I have ever seen.
Okay, as an extranjero I may be slightly biased, it's true, but in my opinion this film is the best political satire I have ever seen.
At its base, democracy has to be the best political system ever invented, but the way it's currently used in The US has tainted it almost beyond its original intent.
As far as political satires go, Iannucci's In the Loop and The Death of Stalin have to me near the top of the best ever made, but this one, Irresistible, simply takes everything you've ever believed and flips it. Whether you're Democratic, Republic or other, it takes everything you've ever believed to heart and tells you how, right now, it is in The US, politically-speaking.
Please, if you have any interest in US politics, do me a favour and watch this movie.
Control (2007)
Superbly acted, but ultimately boring
Haven't seen many Sam Riley films, but here he gives a mesmerisingly convincing performance. Samantha Morton also convinces albeit with much less to work on.
The music is great, the story has the potential to provide great drama, the lead actor is great, it's really amazing how the film managed to be so boring. It felt 45 minutes too long, which would have made a very short film indeed, so clearly, more needed to be happening on screen. I'm talking about garbage Hollywood action, but something more was needed to captivate the audience.
I hope this gear remade well one day. The potential is there, but sadly, this film fails to deliver.
End of Sentence (2019)
An underrated gem
Wow, what a roller-coaster of emotions. This movie had me laughing and crying along with it. I was going to say, 'laughing and crying in equal measure', but in truth, the laughing outweighed the crying. Only the ending drew tears from me.
It had a haunting soundtrack, two of the songs in the movie - one very old, one modern - will stay with me for a long time.
It's a story of dysfunctional families, disenfranchised youth and hidden pasts.
Well worth the watch, in my opinion, doubt you'd be disappointed.
Enemy (2013)
Kafkaesque but more nonsensical
After reading Metamorphosis, you're left to ponder over what the author meant and how to apply it to life, both subjectively and objectively. After watching this film, you're left to think, 'What on Earth was that about?'
Jake Gyllenhaal gives a strong lead performance, as to be expected, and Sarah Gadon has great on-screen presence despite having very little with which to work.
Apparently, José Saramago's book is awesome, this film isn't. It's entertaining and even thought-provoking in places but ultimately, is missing that something to make it a real classic.
Race (2016)
No salute?!
Great until the last ten minutes. How the hell can you have a Jesse Owens film about the 1936 Olympics and not include his famous salute?! The film had so much promise; surprisingly well acted, pulled at the heart-strings and covered Jesse's faults, i.e. his affair, well.
The film is all about Jesse Owens and the 1936 Olympics - it's not about anything else - and yet by far the most famous thing involving those two is missed out. During the last few minutes of the film I'm thinking to myself: 'What exactly inspires Jesse to do the salute? Is it a political movement? Is it his friend? Is it the Jewish guys? Wow, don't tell me it's the German guy!' And, then, it ends without it! Totally unacceptable in my book.
It also missed out what Roosevelt did concerning Jesse, as do most US history books I'm lead to believe (Watch the BBC's "QI" to find out).
All in all, a great film, heading for a 9 from me, until the unacceptable rewriting of history, hence 6/10