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Rodriguez1996
Reviews
It's a Lot (2013)
Awful movie, Schindler's List is funnier than this.
I was excited for the release of this film, as it was shot outside my college and I avidly followed the (rather good) marketing campaign on Facebook, leading up to the cinema release. Unfortunately I could not make it to the opening weekend of the film and was disappointed as I loved 'Anuvahood' and am a keen supporter of UK cinema, especially the urban genre.
I finally got to see this film on DVD today and was thoroughly disappointed. It seems I had a close call not going to cinema and wasting nearly £10 on this rubbish. 'It's A Lot' promised to be a laugh a minute comedy in the style of the aforementioned 'Anuvahood' and the grandaddy of all urban comedies 'Friday'. I can honestly say I sat through the full 96 minute duration of this movie and the most I ever did was smile, and that was at unintended humour. Horrible film, stupid plot, full of stereotypical racist jokes about white people (and I'm not even white) and for some reason the main character's father was the same age as him, was this part of the joke I wondered, or just bad casting? Probably the latter. Additionally, there was nothing new to see here, predictable guest appearance by Tim Westwood? check, lame rushed attempt at morality towards the end? check, not the best looking guy somehow gets the (half) decent looking girl at the end? check. Which brings me to my next point nicely, the main character Shawn, played by writer/actor Femi Oyeniran was an awkward man-child at best and sometimes I genuinely found myself wondering whether the character was supposed to have a mild learning disability and they just forget to mention this in the script. The 'hot' girls are not hot, the funny scenes are not funny, they even managed to make the usually hilarious Jazzie seem tame. And what the hell was up with the weird ending , where his father strangles him for selling his Lotus, with his 10 year old brother constantly kicking him till he slumps lifeless to the floor? This is then followed by a tedious monologue by Shawn about him using the Lotus money to help pay for the treatment of a girl suffering from cancer, to which, hilariously his father then does a complete U-turn (less than 45 seconds after choking him) and saying "You've matured" (in a perfect London accent DESPITE having an African accent all the way through the film) bizarre, just bizarre!
I wish I could have the 96 mins I wasted of my life back but I can't and so in the end the joke was on me, and will be on you too if you bother wasting your time/money on this lemon. I know I am not alone in sitting straight faced through this, as the film got pulled from cinema after only one weekend - surely some sort of record? I'd be surprised if it made more than £500 nationwide. This film is about as funny as when your nan develops Alzheimer's. My advice buy 'Anuvahood' instead, seen that? then get 'Friday' because that's how a real comedy film should be done.
Attack the Block (2011)
Horrible pathetic rubbish
What an absolute piece of crap this "film" was. Unrealistic, unimaginative and ridiculous! What irked me from the start was that I couldn't understand how everybody who saw the dead alien in the beginning took it so lightly in their stride! "Look here's a dead alien blud" "Ah that's peng fam, I'm gonna sell that on ebay fam" What charm and eloquence! How did this get 6.5? I can only assume that the target audience of this film; teens with no jobs and a list of criminal convictions to their names finally figured out how to use computers and log on to rate this tosh. If I could give it a 0 I would have. I particularly loved how the "director" tried to make us think that not all these scum are the same and try to paint them in a positive light, only the following year for all these idiots to riot and loot the whole damn country! Stick to good UK films such as Shaun Of The Dead and lets stop encouraging crap like this. They probably all pirated the film anyway.