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Black Summer (2019)
A bland zombie show not worth watching
I was excited to see something related to Z Nation, only to be disappointed quickly after I started it. Z Nation is probably my favorite zombie show. This.... this I barely got through watching.
I've noticed this with a lot of shows/movies Netflix tries to do in this genre. They majorly fail at character development and plot. They mix weird music at weird times, unusual effect choices, and overall look like something your average film student makes on a tiny budget from their job at McDonalds. Black Summer isn't an exception.
There's very little dialogue and some of what there is, you can't even understand unless you know Korean or sign language fluently. I'm fairly sure at one point the Korean lady was giving us insight in to who she really was and what she had been through, but since the subtitles didn't translate it and I don't speak Korean, I had no idea what she was saying or why she was crying. I'm not saying Korean and deaf people shouldn't be in movies. I love diversity. But you have to find ways for them to connect to the audience and develop their character, and they didn't do that.
In fact, they didn't develop any of the characters really. The level of development was akin to a one hour movie. I blame the lack of dialogue or meaningful scenes to be honest. But regardless, if you don't want to develop your characters, at least use strong stereotypes so I can take one look at them and know who they are and what they are about. They don't give me any way to really connect to these people or care if they live or die and that dulls all the action. Because I don't care. It's sad if they die like a dead squirrel on the road but it doesn't have any real impact. Not like when someone died or nearly died in Z Nation and I'm ready to throw my laptop across the room.
Another thing was they kept putting these black screens with a word or two on them like a chapter title. Except, not even interesting chapter titles. "Dog" "Alone" "Plan" "New Plan" Not only is this not necessary, but it breaks up the flow of the show and it's so simple and pointless I can't take it seriously. But not in the way where I'm getting comedic relief but in the way I'm just done with it. I don't need you to write "Alone" on the screen. I get it. I see it. He's alone. That's great. Good for him. Like the first few times when it was telling me the names of the characters we were about to focus on, that was fine. But the rest was just dumb.
And can we talk about the music for a second? Very random and didn't really add anything to the effect or scene. Sometimes it was just downright confusing when mixed with the action taking place. At one point, between the camera angles, the way the characters moved, and the music, you would have thought the one lady was stepping up to take control of the group like a bada** b**** and go kick some zombie booty like nobody's business. After she really hadn't managed to do much of anything during the show. But that wasn't what happened. Granted, I couldn't get a handle on her character at all. Maybe she just sucks as an actor. I don't know.
I'd also like to briefly mention the vast differences in the way some of the zombies acted. Some of them were very zombie like and some seemed to have way too many thoughts going on in their brain to be a zombie. The close up camera action on them wasn't helping. And, while often I could ignore that, I was bored so I was noticing the little things a lot more and I wish I hadn't. Someone give these people a class on playing zombies please.
Overall, I feel like this is why people find zombie stuff boring. There was no character development, no strong plot, and no strong driving purpose for most of the characters (they just kind of existed). The camera work could have been better, even though most of it wasn't terrible. And those title screens several times an episode just needed to go away.
All the things that made Z nation a great show: plot, strong characters, strong purpose, development, comedy mixed with horror and gore, etc were not present in this. Things that made The Walking Dead and interesting show, also not present. It's just not worth watching unless all you care about is watching people fight zombies poorly. And no, I don't expect them to fight well since they aren't trained, I'm just pointing out the action is no great fighting sequence or something.
TL;DR: Go watch something else. This isn't worth wasting your time on.
Children of the Corn (1984)
Slightly frustrating.
Personally, I'm surprised the couple survived! They were given plenty of warning not to go to Gatlin. They went anyway. The old guy told them not to go to Gatlin. Then the crazy road signs, which if he thought someone was messing with the signs, he should have gone back and gone down the other road. Then the fact that everything was messed up and no one was around should have been a sign to get the heck out of there. Vicky was sort of getting the idea but Bert was oblivious to everything. Even after going into a house and talking to Sara, he thinks it's okay to split up and stay in the town?? Seriously, if it were me, I would not have even gone into Gatlin. If I ended up there, I sure as hell wouldn't stick around to find out why I shouldn't be there. That is just stupid. It amazes me that in the end Bert actually does something smart considering the whole first half of the movie he was a major idiot! I mean, so what if someone got murdered. You shouldn't stick around a creepy town just to report it. Go somewhere else. This is just one of those horror movies where you want to scream and yell at the characters for being stupid. I give it a six out of ten though because the second half of the movie was decent and there were some pretty cool effects. The whole set up of things was creative.
The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)
A Disappointment
Several of my friends had suggested this movie to me a few years ago. The way they talked about it, I really thought it would be good. I was excited to see it was on Netflix when I got Netflix, but then I didn't watch is for a while because I was kinda anxious about it. The only reason I'm mentioning all this is because perhaps my expectations of it were too high. Once it started, I got the feeling it was going to be a long movie. It was really slow and uninteresting. In fact, the whole movie was slow. I didn't feel like I knew the characters enough to identify with them and really feel for them, so where some movies you are on your edge of your seat worried about the character, I was just sitting there wondering about what the actors were thinking or who drew that picture. I also didn't like the mixed languages. The girls didn't understand German and none of them understood the Asian man, so none of them were really communicating. The Surgeon put the one person who spoke a language he didn't seem to know at the front. So really, there was no verbal communication between the two. It was also very tame regarding how much it showed. You see a glimpse of the girls breasts every once in a while and you see the surgeons butt in the pool, but nothing gory. Everything is really covered up. The connecting points of the three people are covered by bandages. There is nothing really graphic comparatively speaking. I really expected it to be more graphic, but it wasn't. It wasn't convincing and it never got me emotionally involved. It felt more like watching a science video than a horror movie. Granted, the idea of the movie was rather sick and the idea of what was going on was rather sick. It's not really worth watching. As for the second one, I didn't even make it half way through before turning it off. It started out better than the first one, but that isn't saying much. Basically, find something else to watch. Don't waste your time with this one.
Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010)
On The Edge Of My Seat
Well, maybe not on the edge of my seat because I was laying in bed but that is not the point. A lot of reviews really bash all the resident evil sequels for being mindless or lacking any enjoyable aspect. I completely disagree. The characters may not be the most developed ones ever but they meet the needs of the movie. You don't really need to know the whole story of every character. The lack of development also adds to the surprise because you don't know them well enough to predict their every movement which is actually refreshing. The continuing action never allows for you to catch your breath. If you turn away for more than a second you will miss something. You have to keep watching. Most movies involving the undead bore me. I don't usually find them very entertaining and I almost never find them scary. Actually I find very few horror movies scary at all but even I wanted to pull the covers over my head a couple times. The only disappointment for me was the ending. I was really hoping for something else. I expected something different from what I was hoping for and from what happened. I guess that is a good thing though. If it ended how I hoped then there would be no point in making anymore movies. If it ended how I expected, there would be nothing to make more movies with. I just feel bad for the characters who are left to endure more of this awful hell. I'm glad I'm not them.
Chernobyl Diaries (2012)
Don't listen to the bad reviews, it's a good movie.
I watched this one my little 15 inch TV. I read a lot of reviews and really was worried I might have wasted my five dollars. Just goes to show you can't believe everything you read. The beginning starts off a little unsure but by the middle of the movie it really gets going. I love horror movies, but a lot of times you can see what's coming and you just want to yell at the actors. Not the case with this movie. You as the audience can't see any more than the actors. There may be some of the typical horror movie events, like the van breaking down and the tour guide dying, but after that, you can't see what is coming next. The darkness and the slowness at the beginning threw me off guard a bit and I certainly did not expect those creatures to show up. The limited view and visibility was what really made this movie good. But hey, don't listen to me, go watch it for yourself.
The Last Airbender (2010)
Screw up....
The Last Airbender is one of my favorite series. I am aware when they base movies off of TV series or a book series like this that the movie is generally choppy and disappointing. Right from the beginning I didn't feel like the characters were as good. Sokas funny sarcastic personality was lost. It felt like they did way too many movements for a little bit of bending. The things they say seem awkward. Zukos scar is barely noticeable. He is not angry or impulsive enough. Zukos uncle isn't old enough. And he tries to act like zukos uncle from the series but it's not very good. And agnee kee? angai kie kai or however you want to spell the correct sounding. The least they can do is say the words right! Mind you, the string of events makes very little sense. All the emotional obstacles the characters face are underplayed or nonexistent. The setting for where certain things happen are wrong. I mean, you are making this off a TV series. There is little left for you to imagine. The fact that they can screw it up this badly when given all the tools they need to make it great and to please everyone. That is just sad.
Contagion (2011)
Good Movie But A Lot Like Other Epidemic Stories
It starts on day 2 which didn't really make any sense at first. You find out why at the very end. I really love epidemic movies and this was no exception. Sadly, It is very much like many other epidemic movies so, if you are looking for something different and surprising, this is not it. I think the events aren't quite as drastic as they would be if they were real. They show a little bit of chaos but they show a lot of empty stores and talk about no nurses at one point. However somehow there is enough food and running water and electricity. To me, that makes it less believable. The story jumps around a lot at the beginning, which for this type of movie is usual. There are some confusing parts but you can figure them out. I actually watched the movie twice to really piece it all together. Overall it was a good movie. My main complaint is the story was too similar to other epidemic movies. It was not unique enough and it wasn't very detailed in some aspects. I would still recommend it.