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After.Life (2009)
Spoiler alert
OK so if the ACTUAL story had been made clearer..there might have been a movie here.
But no ..its all very contrived.
Why not just admit it's a serial killer flick instead of a messy dead/undead plot that leaves you having to go search the directors interview to get closure on the time wasted watching this hotchpotch of ideas.
Undertaker kills people because they waste their lives. Still doesn't make sense in the way its portrayed.
Stupid film. Ms Ricci looks great in her little red nightie. That's it.
Room 6 (2006)
Dreadful
I cannot waste more effort on the review. Its terrible. If you like this movie there is something seriously wrong with your mental capabilities.
Homewrecker (2019)
Dang ! It's a comedy dudes. It's supposed to be stooped stupid.
Highly entertaining black thriller/horror. If you liked Sightseers you'll love this, as I did. It's an hour and a half of Batshit crazy shenanigans..not a proper horror film as such but there is plenty of blood for the final moments of insanity. The only let down was the husband/boyfriend scenes at the end, which were not very well executed. Bad actor wrongly cast and no real examination of relationships. Overall a funny psychotic stalker tale of woe. 7/10.
The Neighbor (2017)
Bad Tomato 🍅
I dunno ..was it something about tomatoes ?? This was recommended on Amazon in the horror category.. the horror was the dreadful story ..unless I missed something...but if I missed it it wasn't apparent. Long drawn out non story .. I kept thinking the hot chick was gonna get Mike to kill her husband or Scot was gonna be some master cars sales madman secret robot lizard ...Why was the son character even written into the story...its all just a bit rubbish ... a real rotten 🍅
Anna (2019)
Urrg. So lazy. Stupid filmskool errors
I dunno ..if your a 13 year old boy this will be heaven. But its just so tacky. The script is at times laughably benal. Reciting Russian prose does not add intellect to a movie. If you like trashy Shades of Grey this will be rightupyourstreet.. The editing is really poor. Scenes go from day to night out of sync. It's full of continuity errors. And the messy time jumps don't help. There's some proper hammy acting too but with a script that bad, it's hard to tell if the actors are just on an impossible mission. The overall story is weak .. relying on destructive relationships to get you emotionally involved. I didn't care about any of them. Yeah there were some crazy shoot outs, but again the fight sequences were poorly choreographed and at times ridiculously so. Mr Murphy is a solid actor and easy on my eye but he managed to come across as pretty ordinary in this role. No charisma.
As for the attempts at Russian accents from out British actors ..oh dear. Terrible. Mirren went from heavy over the top Russian
to Welsh in one sentence. These kinds of mishaps totally spoil the movie. As soon as you are laughing at a terrible script ..the immersion is lost. To be fair .. I watched to the end out of curiosity..how on earth is this gonna wrap ... as expected I was disappointed with the ending .. so stupid.
Exorcist II: The Heretic (1977)
I gave it a 2 for Linda's awesome white dresses. But that's it ... the only thing deserved of a rating. This is supremely terrible.
Really bad. Except Linda's Gunne Sax dresses. Yeah ....why is Africa made of polystyrene .....
BlacKkKlansman (2018)
Mehhhh... missed opportunity
So it gets a 5 from me as pretty mediocre. Mainly because of the sludgy pace and an abundance of artistic licence. It certainly doesn't stick to the book.
But ..its well acted and the costume department do a grand job of capturing the feel of the 70s, if a little OTT and garish in parts.
The sadest thing is a missed opportunity to tell this amazing true story with some pizazz. It rambles along and never really has any heart. It also lacks any real empathy with the situation or characters involved. Could've done better.
Nails (2017)
1 star for the set / locations. 1 star for a great 1st 5 minutes. 1 star for ....hmmm I'm struggling ... OK another one star for that road kill opener. Then it's all downhill.
Terrible acting. All of them hammy or over the top. Dreadful script. Not a script full of dread ..that would work...but no, just endless ridiculous decisions, made by mind numbingly boring characters.
There was no plot. Just a vast hole, where remnants of horror films of old, swirled around in a disjointed, nonsensical mess.
No rhyme or reason for any of it.
Special fx make-up was disastrous.
Super fake looking & no continuity.
I waited in vain for a satisfactory ended ..other than it ending ..which eventually was highly satisfying 😌
So yeah ...I didn't like it.
Don't watch it,
Nothing to see here..
Hunter Killer (2018)
Awful ...terrible script, ridiculous story. Plot holes big enough for that sub!!
How ANYONE could give this movie a rating higher than 1 is beyond me. Awful screenwriting using terrible storytelling. No explaination as to why a rubbish collection of marines are sent to a certain base, which then miraculously turns out to be where the Russian President is held. I could go on with the enormous plot holes but I've already sacrificed 2 hours of my life on this distinctly smelly pile of movie pooh. Enough already !!
Titanic II (2010)
hahahahahahahahahahahaha
Ha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
But seriously not even bad funny ... I laughed at first for maybe 10mins ... then I just sat aghast ..... maybe watch this if you want to see how bad a movie can be ..