Change Your Image
renezelwe
Reviews
The Shallows (2016)
memorable
Blake Lively's acting, which is both traditional and physical, is one of the dishes which sells this film, and the star supporting actress is the camera which is her accurate and loving slave. Every muscle she moves is captured on celluloid as if you the viewer were next to her in her adventure. When I was watching this movie I had to convince myself that I was there and the shark was not CG, and that was by no means difficult to do. Several horror films have successfully managed to capture sexy underwater images but none have done it quite as well as this movie. Oh and I forgot about all the thrills and the suspense and the blood, and the music and the involving script and the differing supporting characters within the plot. In terms of longevity it is gore and sexualisation that makes a film memorable and film makers who do not realise that are naïve; as I write the ONLY 7 films to have been released in that category in the last 18 months are Ex Machina, It Follows, Fifty Shades Of Grey, Crimson Peak, Conjuring 2, Neon Demon and The Shallows. As a group beat those if you can.
The Torturer (2005)
Lamberto and the boys in the band do a good job
A distorted 'torture' video is shown to prospective actresses and the interviews take place in a theatre which looks like a multiplex with a circle(my favourite species of multiplex). The video is nearly monochrome with bright red blood. The cinematic story is interesting as are the actresses who make their characters credible. The reality of the story comes to light in the second half where the effects are far more realistic, and this main body of the film is done very well indeed, and even the rough sex does not look ugly. There are three prints to choose from: an Italian print classified 14, which I haven't seen so cannot say if it is cut, a South American print, and a Dutch Eurocult print which impressed me and which is definitely uncut. This isn't quite torture porn perfection like Martyrs and Pernicious, but it is a worthwhile contribution to the subgenre and is presented as a modern Gothic Giallo. This is another film which attracts a lot of unconstructive critiscism, mostly because of its violence. It isn't actually happening, guys.
Pernicious (2014)
open minds v.closed minds
The writers of most critical reviews of this film don't seem to realise a) that girls with a mental problem may not always shower naked, b) that actresses who play a certain type of girl will not necessarily be acting badly, and c) that blood and body parts will be fake or someone will investigate. What this film does do is make the characters, the effects and the storyline credible, and when you add in the accurate shooting (half of films made don't do this), and the way colours and contrasts are used, you have an intelligent and perfect or near perfect horrorfilm which can be enjoyed as many times as you want. The thing about good horror, and in particular good torture porn, is you have to get the blood colours right and this one does. Three American girls go to Thailand to teach children and become embroiled in local superstitions. That's it, but you will enjoy becoming engrossed in all the different parts of the plot if you just watch the movie with an open mind. People with closed minds hate horror they "think" is in any way sexualised. Thankfully for cinema, adults in democracies such as the U.S. and U.K. are allowed to choose their own entertainment, which is why Psycho exists.
The Gift (2015)
wasted opportunity
The colours, lighting, exteriors, interiors and jump scares were all good, but the action wasn't. A topless female is photographed twice from the back through frosted glass, and a female is barefoot in 4 brief appearances, 2 of a couple of seconds and 2 so brief they are barely noticeable. Did the actress(es) back off from all that or was it the Director? Unless thrillers have female flesh and violence as proper ingredients and not just fleeting glimpses they will not regularly put bums on seats. I have been an avid and regular cinemagoer since the early 1950s and have probably seen as many horrors and thrillers in their various versions as anyone, and I again have to use No One Lives, Maniac, Ex Machina, It Follows and 50 Shades Of Grey as recent examples of excellence. Since then we have had the wasted opportunities of Knock Knock and now this one. I went to a first performance where the audience had all paid about £7 and were bored stiff. Has no one seen the chilling Tale Of The Large Empty Barn?
Knock Knock (2015)
boring and disappointing
The cinematic excellence of Ex Machina, It follows, and 50 Shades Of Grey at the turn of the year now seem like a distant memory. If you go to the cinema now you get dross like this, when will they ever learn how to make money? In recent years most cinemas didn't bother with the potentially bankable Maniac, No One Lives, and Human Centipede. As a matter of fact this starts off like Human Centipede does, which is the biggest insult possible to the brilliant HC. Actresses who think slippers, wedges and woolly socks are sexy, camera staff who don't know where to point the camera, questionable sex which is so fast and distorted it is somewhere between boring and unwatchable, very little gore, and a shower scene which is a bad boring joke, that's what you get here. Any adult ratings must have been self-certified, and it is difficult to believe this is the Eli Roth who Directed Cabin Fever and Hostel. He badly needs a course in Camera and calling himself Eli is an insult to Let The Right One In. I can't think of a bigger turnoff than being physically abused by two unsexy actresses, or having to watch them from a theatre circle for that matter. Lovers of pure sexy horror give this one a wide berth.
6 donne per l'assassino (1964)
horror fans should unite
The film slaughter of the early 1980s has fortunately now come down to 3 films: Blood And Black Lace, Fistful Of Dollars, and Murder By Decree, and we should all work together to make them available in their longest action versions. If you are a horror virgin Blood And Black Lace is about a masked serial killer operating in Rome, and menacing a fashion house in particular. The body count is around 8, and one victim features a scene where her badly marked face is shown to the camera and then put back inside a stove. This is missing from the Arrow Blu-ray print, and before you challenge me on this, the Tim Lucas Arrow commentary concurs with me at least in part. I have not seen the longest action version of BABL since 1966 and I do not own a copy of it. BABL was the first colour Giallo, and in its original form it was the first full-on effects and make-up horror film. Without its punchline scene being complete it will not be strong enough to hold on to its reputation. It seems to me that when it comes to the crunch real horror fans shrink away and leave it to individuals in the film industry and the BBFC to crush critical reviews of censored versions.
Murder by Decree (1979)
Well filmed but what about the cuts.
The background to this well filmed movie involves an interesting and popular, but never official, suspect for the JTR murders. From what I have read and seen the official suspect was the boyfriend of one of the victims who quite likely had reason to hate the other four; he was interrogated for hours and cautioned but there wasn't enough evidence to be certain of a conviction (something to do with different street addresses for back to back houses or something; you've got to remember that hookers were regarded as second class citizens in 1888). All or nearly all of the DVD prints of this movie are unsatisfactory, not because the movie is badly filmed, but because nearly all of the scenes with the camera against the window or inside the room have been omitted. In his commentary a puzzled Mr Clark eventually appears to tell Anchor Bay that their print stinks. This is probably because the complete scenes in the original 1970s VHS releases were quite simply not as graphic as similar scenes in films like Bloodspattered Bride, Suspiria, and Turistas. The movie has now been devalued and needs someone like Lionsgate to put it together properly on Bluray. It is a similar situation to Fistful Of Dollars where the on screen footage of a guy manouvreing three barrels into position turns out to be only the tip of a massive iceberg of missing scenes.
Per un pugno di dollari (1964)
needs more attention
Felixoteiza is right, 3 barrels are set up. That 2nd of 2 1967 releases has been rarely seen since the 1970s and is 3.5m longer. That chapter is longer and 1 protagonist in the longer brawling gets a nasty eye which is shown in slow-mo closeup at least twice. Trouble is a master got lost in Europe in 1982 and MGM need to find it. I think they know where it is; they just need time and then a little encouragement. They may be a little short at the mo but that is a far superior print and it is worth their while releasing it on Bluray fairly soon. This film is potentially a goldmine on BR and all other westerns are comparatively insignificant, FAFDM and TGTBATU do not have FODs Gothic splendour or tension and they have long boring passages.