piracyistheft Reviews

Elysium (I) (2013)

What happened?

[6/10 · 24 August 2013]

Watching this movie, I can only assume that the genius behind District 9's great storytelling lays in Terri Tatchell's talent as a screenwriter, not in Neil Blomkamp's.

This movie looks great, and has a good concept, but the script is terrible. All citizens of Elysium are "moustache twirlers", devoid of any subtlety whatsoever. The characters are beyond stupid and every single line of dialog is cringe-worthy. The logic and rules of this universe are poorly thought out and not explained, and the whole plot is non-nonsensical, with things clearly set up to move the plot along, with no regard to logic and character consistency.

Having said that, if you leave your brain at the front door, you will be entertained. This movie does look great and there are some visually impressive scenes, although there is some over-use of bad shaky-cam.

Pain & Gain (2013)

A pleasant Surprise

[8/10 · 24 August 2013]

I think that most of the hate towards this movie comes from the fact that it is directed by Michael Bay.

Most of the criticism states that this movie is morally incorrect, making a comedy out of a horrific situation. This is something that happened almost two decades ago, and I get it that the survivors will be offended, but I don't get the outrage of general audiences. We are far too removed from the real events to not be able to appreciate this movie for what it is.

People don't seem to have a problem with Goodfellas, and that movie glamorizes violence and mobsters, and as is the case with Pain and Gain, it was based in real events. Yet people have no problem enjoying it and quoting it.

I feel that if this movie weren't directed by Michael Bay, it would have been well received.

Bats in the Belfry (2010)

Amateurish and unoriginal!

[1/10 · 4 September 2011]

I saw this film at this year's Frightfest short film showcase.

This film is entertaining enough but it has a lot of unforgivable flaws.

The film, as I understand, was made by only one guy. So one must forgive the ugly looking animation, poor voice work and muffled soundtrack. In fact, one could consider this a good start for an animation filmmaker. However, this film has one major flaw that took me right out of the film.

The thing that bugged me the most was that the film was utter unoriginal, having borrowed everything from existing films: The vampires are a shameless copy of the vampires in 30 Days of Night, and the main character is a copy of Samurai Jack, as is the sky background which is almost copy paste from Monkey Island. The list goes on and on.

I read an interview with the director where he actually acknowledged all these references. But the thing is that acknowledging it as references doesn't make it okay. When referencing other films, one must put a new spin on it, make fun of it, or do it in a clever way. This film doesn't do any of these things. It just steals lots of elements from existing properties and assembles it altogether. That is very cheap filmmaking in my opinion.

I really hope that the director improves his storytelling capabilities and tries to tell an original story next time.

The Last Post (2011)

A little gem!

[8/10 · 3 September 2011]

I saw this film at this year's Frightfest, and the film was screened right after two over the top funny horror films.

However, the audience immediately embraced this wonderful tale with a great performance from Jean Marsh.

Not knowing anything about the film, I was expecting a horror film in the style of her husband's films (Neil Marshall, director of The Descent). On the contrary, Axelle Carolyn gives us a beautiful dramatic tale and her direction is flawless.

She has a great career ahead of her and I would like to see her directing features in the future.

Tucker and Dale vs Evil (2010)

This film needs to go mainstream!

[7/10 · 3 September 2011]

I can't understand why a film like this can't get a wide release.

I had seen the trailer almost a year ago and had almost forgotten of its existence until I had the chance to see it at this year's Frightfest.

This is such a clever and funny film. It never wears out its premise. The main characters are hilarious and most importantly, are characters you care about. The college kids, like in most slashers, are two dimensional, but it is part of the clichés this film pokes fun of so well.

All in all, it is a shame that such a hilarious film gets to cinemas unnoticed, especially in a year where so many R-Rated comedies have found success at the box-office.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011)

Rupert Wyatt is the new Spielberg

[7/10 · 23 August 2011]

Believe this. Rupert Wyatt is the new Spielberg.

The climactic action scene on the bridge is brilliantly filmed. Everyone says that this film real star is Andy Serkis, but I digress. It is Ruper Wyatt who takes a tired, ridiculous and far-fetched premise and makes it work to full extent.

The fact that Ceaser is able to connect so well to the audience is thanks to the way Rupert handles the story, giving it such a weight to the more intimate scenes. And even if the cgi is not always credible, the story takes its time to create a real character out of it, that by the end of the film you'll find yourself at the edge of your seat. And the fact that we are talking about a film with cgi apes, that is all even more commendable, if we take into account, that all the other summer blockbusters failed to create truly engaging stories and characters.

This film brings the kind of excitement and heart Steven Spielberg used to brings us with his films.

On a final note, the film's biggest flaw is Tom Felton's character who in two very awkward scenes says two lines spoken by Charlton Heston in the original.

Cowboys & Aliens (2011)

boring film

[1/10 · 23 August 2011]

This is one of the worst films I've see in years.

I didn't expect much from this film, because the trailer had failed to engage me. I went to see it anyway and I profoundly disliked it. Say what you want about Michael Bay, but his films while narratively inept have good action scenes. This film, however, is a such a drag. With a title like Cowboys and Aliens one should expect a fun and dumb action film. This film is dumb, but instead of fun, it is boring and plays itself too seriously.

The actors are all mostly good, except Olivia Wilde, whose character is nothing but eye candy and a character devised to provide exposition.

Green Lantern (2011)

Good visuals but terrible script

[23 August 2011]

I am so sad for not liking this film.

I love Ryan Reinolds and Martin Campbell is a very good director. In fact, this film's lack of quality is not so much their blame. The problem with this film is the screenplay.

It is a paint by the numbers story filled with characters we do not care and painful clichés. There are too many cheesy moments, such as the scene where GL saves the helicopter from crashing by building a giant racetrack. This film has a big budget, but the screenplay is like an early 90's superhero film.

Mark Strong is great as Sinestro though.