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jordan-maxwell
Reviews
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon (2014)
Many of you have watched it ..but many of you still need to WATCH it!
There is a National Film Registry in the United States Library of Congress which preserves important films and media for being either "culturally, historically or aesthetically significant".
Now I'm a bit concerned about the capacity the Registry has as its basically going to need to fill every second the Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon has ever recorded.
I've noticed this show is one of the most watched shows in the US. The problem I have is that while there are millions of viewers and fans, I'm still frustrated by the likelihood that a large percentage have never actually sat down and watched the Tonight Show.
If everyone had actually watched this – it would be taking a giant desecration on Planet Earth II right now for the #1 slot. I mean this show has everything
but asks for nothing. It did not want to become perfection. It started as a usual talk show host where people can watch some of their favorite celebrities within a comfortable environment. But boy oh boy is it much more than that
Its Art. Its Scientifically mind-boggling. It's the flag on top of a mountain summit and the cherry to a Bakewell tart. It's the show we all bloody deserve!
That is right – we deserve a show like Jimmy Fallon. It epitomizes everything the human race is and will ever be. For every laugh made on the Tonight Show, my perspective of the world gets that little more clearer. Its shown us REALITY. On a side note here is a list of things that I can never view the same after watching this show:
1) The Batmobile 2) Marco Polo (The TV Show) 3) Anyone called Sara 4) Denzel Washington 5) In the Air Tonight 6) Disneyland 7) Jerry Seinfeld 8) Uber 9) #'s 10) Thank you letters. 11) Repeating someone's sentence 12) Bradley Cooper 13) American Audience members
As a kid our perception of the world is complex, fuzzy and almost nerve-racking. But never in my life have I had a clearer view on life than after watching the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon.
Now of course we have some honorable mentions. The first being the best two words within the show's title; Jimmy Fallon. A name I do not think I can ever forget. Jimmy is an anomaly. Almost one of the most complex people I have ever come across and quite possibly the most talented person on this planet. He makes me laugh in a way I can't describe. Never before have I genuinely been in stitches constantly but one man who probably deems it – usual material. And the best part is that it comes from within. Its pure Jimmy. I feel like I know the guy as everything that comes out of his mouth is what he thinks. I almost know Jimmy too well.
Now while the set-up or formula of the show is the constant – every week is different. You'll get new laughs, new lines and new surprises each time you watch this show. That's something I've never seen before. To maintain that level of consistency for the number of episodes is admirable. I have to look at my TV screen in awe every time I watch Jimmy Fallon. The small kid from SNL who gained his reputation via his impressions, skits and likable personality. Jimmy got there on his own merits and I respect him fully for it.
But sadly I retain most of my respect for another man. A very, very important man. An under-looked man
not only in the show, but within the public. He may not get the same screen-time or use as Jimmy Fallon, but dear god if Steve Higgins isn't the shining halo of this show
.I don't know what is.
Steve Higgins
oh dear this could be a long one. There's much I could say about Steve. But the conundrum I have is the man keeps leaving me speechless. If The Tonight Show was a Mr Whippy, then Steve one hell of a flake.
We all like the celebrity guests but the real deal is when Steve appears. The # segments of the show are genius. They are everything I could ask of them and more. And that's sadly a testament to Steve. Some comedians have lines. Or boundaries. Or Shame. Even Jimmy's hit a couple of border controls before. But not Steve. Steve is yet to prove this fact for the man sees a line and then decides to take a giant moon jump over it. For Steve pushes boundaries. He pushes limits. He does what no one else would dare to do. But the thing is I can't explain it in writing. It needs to be seen. So for anyone reading this please, go home tonight and watch Hashtags #I'mDumb published on the 13 May 2016 – it could change your life. For a full experience please listen with noise-cancelling earphones.
Unfortunalty what I say is mute. I'm just here to pass on the good word. I want the world to experience what so few of us have
..and that's PERSPECTIVE.
If you don't understand what I mean by that you need to do some homework and sit down and watch the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon.
I for one will be doing the same tonight. And tomorrow. And the day after that. And for many more glorious days to come. Because I've realised The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon isn't just a TV show, or a chat show, or some 'light-hearted entertainment'. It's now become way of life.
And on that ladies and Gentlemen I say 'EW'!.
PS. If you didn't identify any type of irony within this review that I'm sad to say that you have never watched the tonight show.
Suicide Squad (2016)
Couldn't really understand the Squad, but the Suicide part I totally get.
This film is just Wow! You know when you are with a group of friends and you decide to make a really bad joke, you know it won't get laughs, you know people are going to moan and groan but for some reason there is that small little part in your mind that thinks it is a good idea. You know exactly what I'm talking about.
So you have to give the producer credit that he was granted $200 million dollars to finance his bad joke. I mean there are literally no words to describe this film. Well that's not strictly true. In fact, please see below a list of thirteen analogies that I believe try to describe what this film was more painful than:
1) Diving head-first into a pool of broken double-paned glass. 2) Trying to iron your shirt but instead of your shirt, you're ironing your face. 3) Stuttering while you're trying to mug one of your friends off (let's call him Dylan). 4) Batman Vs Superman 5) The realisation people actually liked this movie. 6) Being hyped for a movie to come out for years but it just ends up being crap
oh sorry guys. 7) Bovril 8) Being stuck in an alternate universe where you're just stubbing your toe repeatedly. 9) Jimmy Fallon 10) Jimmy Fallon's agent 11) Jimmy Fallon Fans 12) Watching 'the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon'. 13) Having a Northern Housemate.
I imagine you get the idea by now. I do want to thank the film though as it was just the motivation I needed in life. In fact, I do hope they start showing this to students while they are at a young age as it gives them such an important message. If someone was able to pitch and make money from a film such as 'Suicide Squad' then you know what, anything is bloody possible isn't it.
So in the words of Jared Leto's joker I have just one message for all you Suicide Squad fans and buffs out there: HA HA HA HA HA!
Good day.
Stranger Things (2016)
Now this is how you make a Television Show!
When it comes down to 'Stranger Things' I'm in a bit of a conundrum. Never before has a show managed to hit all elements of what people value as entertainment. This TV Show has humor, it has horror, it has mystery, it has one hell of a soundtrack, it has many moments of nostalgia, it has amazing acting (especially from the younger cast which is a nice change), it has amazing visuals, it has sad moments as well as shocking ones -but most of all it has heart. There is a theme of love that's evident across the shows run, whether it's the persistent love Joyce Byers has for her son that allows her to keep on searching for him against all odds or the love of friendship that causes our three protagonists to put themselves in danger in order to be reunited with their friend. The last scene says it all but also the connection and the undefinable love between Mike and Eleven.
Also, credit to the writers for creating such interesting characters. Each one felt they had deserved their screen time. Hopper again is brilliant as we never really know his motives but we again root for his happiness. Nancy's story-line felt too separate at the start but it really blended in well with the story and gave the viewers a taste of adolescent life during the 80s. It was nice to see such empowering female leads – each one felt strong and determined but no more than the real highlight of the show, Eleven. The character of Eleven is probably one of the smartest moves Netflix has ever done. They have managed to make one of the most complex characters on television with barely any dialogue. There is constant empathy felt for Eleven. You can tell from her expression that her childhood had been stripped from her life. She is separate from the world but we still manage to connect with her in an emotional way. Like ET, there innocence and circumstance leads us to worry and care about them as time goes on. The last part of the show is one of the most heart-breaking moments of television I've seen – but it all highlights one of the shows prominent themes – love. Also if Millie Brown isn't nominated for an Emmy alongside Winona, I'll lose my faith in the awards system. Age shouldn't be a hinder and if anything she has shown it shouldn't be correlated with skill – putting to shame many of Hollywood's actors.
This show is weird, but in a unique way. It would be hard to compare a show like this to that of 'Game of Thrones' or 'Breaking Bad'. It is very much its own thing, taken the styles of some of the best 80s movies to create one golden piece of entertainment. Get ready to experience many different types of emotions within 6 hours.
I do hope there is another season however, even if there isn't – this show is worthy to stand on just this one for repeated viewings. I hope this will be a classic for newer generations so they can experience the emotions and feelings found uniquely within the 80s. But I've taken up too much of your time already – just go and watch it.
Taken 3 (2014)
Taken the Mick
I mean...Just wow!
The term 'flogging a dead horse' has never been more appropriate for any film in history.
Firstly I'll say this isn't officially the worst film ever made. It's marginally better than Batman vs Superman, though that is like saying suffocation is mildly more enjoyable than drowning.
After 'Taken's' success the studios have decided to force two sequels down our throats much like Marvel Studios have done with the Avengers, as they believe we both want and need to see them. Well I've got some news for them, and not to paraphrase Nigel Farage's immigration speech, but we don't want them, we never wanted them, its time for them to go.
Now while Taken 2 hurt and made me need to pop a few paracetamol tablets to remove the headache it caused - I feel after Taken 3 I'm going to need emergency care. Never before has a film made me feel more like I was in need of a hernia exam. As a matter of fact I imagine a hernia exam would have been more fun.
1) If we start off with the plot. Now just imagine a blank piece of paper. Okay your pretty much filled in on that section.
Now onto the acting. Liam Neeson plays every Liam Neeson character post 2001. Secondly, the villain has the stereotype that matches a loud Italian. What is original however, is the writers decision to use Russians as the bad guys in the movie. Who would have thought!? Now they at least deserve creativity points and a Smiley Sticker for that.
But the best of the best my dear friends, is of course the big man. Forrest Whitaker. I mean his name is quite ironic seeing how the character he plays has the brain functionality to that of Forrest Gump. I mean the guy LITERALLY picks up a bag of BAGELS and smells them in case it may have something important to do with the case. Lucky for him isn't it - but I'll get to that later. But all in all Forrest Whitaker plays probably the most worst character ever made in a movie. I now actively hate Forrest Whitaker!
There was a point in the movie where I felt his character actually liked the fact that Bryan Mills escaped and was causing havoc. In his mind he has been watching too many cat and mouse detective shows and though 'Now's my time to shine
let me get my chess piece'. So he decides to carry this chess piece throughout the movie to symbolize how he's playing a 'game' with Bryan Mills. (Slaps forehead*) Moreover, he seems to always know Bryans plans.
There's a scene when Mills is locked up in a car by the police and Whitaker calls up to warn them that 'hes playing a game – get out of there'. So lets rewind that thought. The head detective of this case tells the police who have their suspect in custody to 'let him go' as he has a 'feeling' that Mills has a plan to escape. Now I'm no detective but I would start to question my bosses actions if he told me to let go the prime suspect over a hunch. But luckily for plot purposes – it works out exactly as Whitaker had anticipated.
Also, I want to give a shout out to the editing department for actively trying to create epileptic fits in the cinemas. One of the best parts of the movie is when Mills tries to contact his daughter while he's on the run so he ACTUALLY poisons her so he would meet her in the girl's bathroom. I mean one could just send a note to his daughter to meet her in the toilet but obviously Liam Neesons trying to go for Father of the Year so the audience will let it slide. Sorry actually the best part could be when Mills survives a car crash that falls 100ft down a hill and explodes. How do the writers explain such phenomenon? Some clever plot twist I hear you ask? Well of course the writers solve this with a 5 second flashback showing Liam Neeson kneeling in a nearby hole on the hill to explain how he survived.
Little issue here – that still doesn't explain how he actually escaped the car crash? I mean its like them explaining James Bond surviving a plane crash by showing a flash back of him eating ice cream in Florence. Oh he didn't die as he was here all along.
Now some films wrap up a mystery by some old file evidence, confession or last minute witness. How does Forrest solve the case? Bagels, apparently. They were warm.
I mean one has to ask themselves what kind of guy goes out for warm bagels, and comes back and commits a murder? This was a genuine line from the film. Read that back and look in the mirror knowing people were PAID to write that. Do you feel good about yourself? Do you? Also, apparently bagels are all you need to get people off a crime. Mills destroyed half the city – killed a bunch of guys, beat up policemen, poisoned his offspring but its okay as he remembered to keep his bagels at an appropriate room temperature. Happy days for all!
So to sum up a warm pastry saves the day. Now you know if you're ever planning on committing a murder for god's sake take a visit to your local bakers. It may save your life. It seems the only thing TAKEN from this film was my FREE time. And on that note enjoy the rest of your day.
High School Musical 2 (2007)
You Are The Movie In Me
HSM2 It's rarely the second film is equal to or exceeds the first one of the franchise. We had it with 'the Dark Knight', 'Shrek 2', 'the Godfather Part II' and now ladies and gentleman we have been blessed with the artwork that is known as 'High School Musical 2'.
To describe this film in a few sentences would be like trying to describe a blind person what Disneyland looks like. They will never really know the sheer magnificence of it until they see it.
But the cleverness of HSM2 is that it doesn't hold back. Whether it's the absolute bangers of tunes (Yes Work this Out I'm looking at you), the emotional roller-coaster that is Troy and Gabriella's relationship ('Gotta Go My Own Way' makes Mufassa's death seem like a pile of rainbows in comparison) or the excellent choreography that could end up putting you in a trance. This film does not hold back I say, it took the elements and qualities from the first film and put it into hyper drive.
All of these points can be summarised by the film's peak, we all know. 'Bet On It' expresses why High School Musical 2 isn't just a film, but an experience. We have to credit Zac Efron for giving it 110% and places a new meaning on the word 'YOLO'. I mean when he's looking down in his reflection in the water, looking back on his mistakes, was I thinking 'man this is cheesier than the quiche I had last week' or 'why isn't anyone on the golf course confused at young Zac's mental breakdown'? No, I wasn't. I was just in awe that the studio had the balls to go out and pull it off.
But of course I'm leaving out the core quality of this movie. This film has one of the most complex and unique character developments I've seen on screen. We've seen Michael Corleone turn from honest veteran to murdering psychopath, but I am afraid that doesn't even come close to the depth and emotional complexity of one of the characters in this film. Some films the main guys aren't always the true hero and sometimes while it seems the film is centred around the main protagonist it in rare occasions is actually centred around one of the side characters.
Well let me put it out there as HSM2 is of course about Ryan Evan's story. He was always under the radar being pushed back by his controlling sister, which we saw in the first film and first half of HSM2. Although, the films place him in the group of the 'bad side' the audience have always foundered a deep respect for Ryan. And like a shy snail, he decided to finally come out his shell in this film. He decided to shake the shackles of his sister's dominance and go and find new friends. It was the best character plot twist I've seen in a while.
Everyone wants something in this film. Sharpay wants fame. Gabriella wants everyone to be happy. Chad wants to whine and complain about something most of the time. But Ryan's want is simple and honest. Long lasting friendships. Is that too much to ask? This writer says no.
What is ingenious is that the seed for Ryan's transformation has been long planted within the franchise. If we look closely we can see that a lot of the songs are foreshadowing Ryan's future decisions. Let's look at it, Ryan indeed did 'Start something New' when he was 'Breaking Free' from his past life. All he needed was to 'Work It Out' with his new friends, so he could in essence 'Bop to the Top' so that 'Everyday' from that day forward he could 'humuhumunukunukuapua'a' his way forward to a life of respect and more importantly
.redemption.
You can 'Bet on It' ladies and gentlemen, you really can.
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)
Amazing? No... But In terms of a No. 2 - Spot On!
It was a cold February evening back in 2010. I was walking my dogs in the rangers and it was quite a frosty day FYI so the ground was quite damp and wet. Now as I was walking I slipped and as I did I fell into a pile of dog crap. This wasn't some Poodle's doing were talking about, I'm talking Great Dane business. Maybe it was the frost but it was also quite soggy itself. So not a pleasant experience and I had to walk back home smelling of this dog dung, with my dignity and humility gone.
Amazing Spiderman 2 makes that dog crap seem like a Thornton's Chocolate Layer Cake. I mean that with 100% absolute honesty. I just want to say I remember seeing the first Amazing Spiderman thinking this really is as bad as it gets. But boy oh boy did they prove me wrong.
You know how you look at things and think how in God's name did you get there. I call this 'the Trump effect'. Amazing Spiderman 2 epitomises this effect - as I was watching the film I was thinking, how did they manage to raise $200 million dollars to finance this film project and that was the result. $200 million! 200 MILLION! Let that sink in for a moment
. that's real money right there spent on the film you have watched. (I would hit myself but I'm saving it for something worthwhile later).
And like Trump, while I sat and watched this film shocked at its absurdity I had to sit there and think this is so ridiculous its sadly become enjoyable. I mean when you jump of a building onto a bicycle with no seat, you can either a) Experience the pain and agony or b) Think 'you know what this is a pretty funny situation.' Perhaps I should start with the beginning.
1)We meet Jamie fox's character. A troubled individual with poor social skills who only wants to be recognised by his Hero Spiderman (I'll give the writers originality points for that). Spiderman saves Jamie and they have a cute bonding session for his birthday. Now we saw the trailer so I know he becomes this 'Electro' character and I was wondering how they were going to pull him off. So I was awe when I realised that the character become Electro by falling into a pool of eels. Now I don't know about you but I know a middle finger when I see one, and Jamie Fox falling into an Eel tank takes the cake. Electro then goes on a mini rampage and Spiderman comes to the rescue but forgets Jamie's character's name. The most obvious human reaction to this event would of course be for Electro to start destroying Time Square with electrical currents and suddenly turning on Spiderman who used to be his long life hero. So lesson number 1, if you ever meet someone emotionally unstable who has accidentally fallen into an eel tank giving the person super human abilities to supply and take in electrical currents
. dear god remember their name.
2)Next the side plot Airplane collision scene. The clever writers of this film in their storyboard room decided 'you know what this film needs, a completely unrelated incident were two airplanes are about to collide during Spiderman's big battle with Electro – because you know what we can'. Slaps forehead*.
3)And now Andrew Garfield. Very fitting name for someone who has the acting capability in this film to that of an orange cat. I mean the kid makes me root for the two planes to crash. Also, the actor has as much charisma as a Lidl's Weetabix and the fact he landed this role really sums up the experience. Lesson number 2/ You apparently don't need to act in an acting role.
I could go on ladies and gents but frankly I don't have the time. But in short is the Amazing Spiderman 2 worthwhile? Let me sum that up with a quote from the film
.'No'.
No one wanted a new Spiderman reboot. We got one. No one wanted a second sequel of that reboot. We got one. At least now we can know that hopefully the producers have learnt their lesson to maybe leave a longer gap between the original films and a new reboot.
I mean what are they going to do know? Reboot a Reboot? It makes me chuckle just thinking of the idea
oh wait.
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)
The justice would be removing this film from history..
I'm not sure what the boardroom meeting for this film sounded like but it must have been along the lines of the following:
Producer 1 - 'guys the last Batman film was a huge success – lets quickly make another one as we like money'
Producer 2 - 'Interesting thought John but seeing as the last one was highly rated isn't there a lot of pressure to make this one even better, its going to be difficult'.
Producer 1 – 'Nah its cool, cause I've got a spanner to throw in the works. Picture this Batman AND Superman in one film'
Producer 2 – 'Ummm...'
Producer 1 – 'Wait it gets better. Both of the hero's will fight against each other
'
Producer 2 – 'But John don't you think that
'
Producer 1 – '
Oh and the best part is the name. Boys and I have been working on it all night
. Wait for it. 'Batman Vs Superman'.
Producer 2 – 'So in a film were Batman fights Superman you're going to call it 'Batman Vs Superman
.. isn't that not only a bit unoriginal but also giving a large part of the plot away.
Producer 1 – 'Nah it's cool as they'll only fight each other for about 20 minutes and then they join up to fight against a bigger enemy'.
Producer 2 – 'Wait so the reason why Batman and Superman resolve their issue is to go against another enemy?
Producer 1 – 'Don't play me for a fool Mark. Come on give me some credit. No something less predictable than that. They resolve their issues because
wait for it
.
20 minutes of intense waiting passes
Producer 1 – '
both their Mums are called Martha'.
Producer 2 – 'John I think that may be a bit unrea
'
Producer 1 – 'Oh the best part they then join forces with Wonder Woman and they fight this big Monster created by Lex Luther as he doesn't like Superman for some reason (we'll work that out later
cough. Or not
cough). Anyway they then accidentally destroy the whole of Metropolis, but they defeat the monster as Superman sacrifices his life to save the town'
Producer 2 – 'Isn't that similar to the ending of the Dark Knight Rises when Batman sacrifi
.
Producer 1 – 'I know what you're going to say but difference is, in the final shot of the film we realise Superman is still alive
dun dun dun
.
Producer 2 – 'That's still exactly the same as the Dark Kni
.'
Producer 1 – 'Mark don't interrupt. You haven't heard the icing on the cake
Ben Affleck as Batman. Come on!
Producer 2 – 'Isn't he shi
'
Producer 1 – '
Oh and were getting Zack Snyder to direct as he had such good criticism from the 'Man of Steel' movie.
Producer 2 – 'Okay I need to stop you right there; I have many questions least of which involve your last statement. I mean firstly why do Batman Vs Superman fight in the first place? Also, why would their mom's name mean anything about literally, anything? And why does Wonder Woman suddenly appear? Also have you not thought about the sheer ridiculousness of destroying the whole of Metropolis
. again?'
Producer 1 – 'I mean I haven't got all the details ironed out, but I was hoping to go on an almost 'wing it' approach, you know like trying to make a cake, just add a few things along the way, and as long as it looks good on the outside (so marketing wise) no one will care about the end result as we've already got their money'.
Producer 2 – 'So before you set out in making this what have you actually decided for certain'.
Producer 1 – 'The Title'.
Producer 2 – 'Sorry John, I don't see it. It's a lot of money to fund and frankly I don't think the idea of Batman Vs Superman can happen. Firstly it's pretty unfair seeing as Superman can fly and shoot lasers out of his eyes so it's not really a fair fight..
Producer 1 – '
No Batman beats Superman in the film'
Producer 2 – 'Riggghttt
.Okay I'm sorry but don't you think the whole idea of this film seems a little to unconvincing. I mean the whole city destruction and monsters being created by Lex Luther
actually out of interest who would you even cast to play him.
Producer 1 – 'We were thinking maybe, Jessie Eisenberg?' Producer 2 – 'Alright I'm on-board!'.
Producer 1 – 'Great, now we just need to find a target audience for this film'.
Producer 2 – 'Oh why not to the similar fan base as Dark Knight, so people who like a compelling story line, good acting, drama, plot twists
.'
Producer 1 – '..Or! Maybe we target comic book fans, or people who think they have read the comics because they have seen the front cover of one. As they wont care about all that other stuff, as long as it has explosions and loud noises they'll be sure to clap their hands'.
Producer 2 – 'Well I guess it can't be a worse superhero film than 'Amazing Spiderman 2' am I right? (Laughs)
Producer 1 – (Laughs) Aha how right you are Mark. Just you see – the whole world will see and love this film.
2 years later
Producer 1 – 'Hey Mark I have this idea for Bat
.'
Producer 2 - 'Get the hell out'.
Producer 1 – 'Okay fair enough'.
Fear the Walking Dead: Pilot (2015)
Okay but on schedule here come the 'Walking Dead' fan base...
Although this was a partly thrilling thriller, i was still bothered by a number of things.
1) the 2-D characters, obviously cliché, and typical family story line of the broken family becoming stronger thanks to a zombie apocalypse.
2) Acting by the young leads was as wooden as the spoon I used to make my scrambled eggs this morning. I'm not expecting Marlon Brando or Tom Hanks, but maybe place acting over appearance in the job description?
3) no likable characters, the main female lead was probably the best, but other than that I had no desire for anyone to survive. Not like Rick and Morgan in the pilot of the 'Walking Dead'.
4) Predictable as well, which is okay for this type of TV show but doesn't match up the unpredictability and coherency of the writing from that of 'Breaking Bad' and 'the Sopranos'.
5) The intense fan base from 'the Walking Dead' that want to rate this show a 10 just...well because.
Again I'm sure this will be a fun show, but not a great one. Like walking dead it's entertaining and is easy to watch, but I can see this show in particular proving that special effect, attractive actors, and a good old but of action is the priority over clear concise writing and in-depth character development. But hey I hope to be proved wrong as we still have a few weeks left until the finale.
Breaking Bad (2008)
'The Godfather' of Television
Forty-two years ago the blessed Godfather hit our screens and from the generation that first viewed it, they have passed it down to their children as a must-see film, and after forty-two years the film still retains its ringing influence on the entertainment industry to the point it has and will continue to be viewed and studied from all areas of the world.
Breaking Bad, in my humble opinion, has the same ringing influence. I believe in forty-two years time and beyond this show will be passed down as the greatest piece of television ever created. Unfortunately we won't realise it yet as, just as the first generation that watched the godfather in 1972 didn't quite realise how much of an influence the film would have, the same can be said here as we are the first generation to view the excellence that is 'Breaking Bad'.
This is not a review per say but my way of expressing my gratitude to the show. I know it can be stupid to become too obsessed with film and TV to the point people say your not living in reality. But if we think about it, could it be that the influence of television and its ability to play with our emotions and thoughts just prove its shows more realism in our lives than we previously considered. This is what 'Breaking Bad' does so superbly, with Vince Gillingam trying to show how even the kindest of people can be the ones who are hiding their true hidden selves in the shadows.
The ability of this show that it makes you reflect months after about express the magnitude of influence it has. I for one have heard people describe it as the 'Greatest TV Show of all time' but here I disagree.
As this show is more than that, it honestly should be considered as one of the 'Greatest pieces of Art'. I wont tell you how or why but they only way you as a reader can find out is to pick up the remote and watch it - at first you may see it as just a normal TV show but I urge you to find the deeper connection it has to the viewer. The teachings on morality, family dedication, choices and loyalty. We live by these morals every day and the show helps us reflect on our actions and how we choose to live our life.
I know this is sounding really deep and I have no doubt I will be seen as a sap with someone thinking 'what a load of crap that guys talking about' and to you I say you're probably right. As what I'm saying probably hasn't made much sense and even when you watch the show it may not do either but maybe just maybe in 42 years time, you may be struck by the realisation of the artistic message this show had.
Prehaps my review can be contradicted by the show itself in Season 2's episode 'Better Call Saul'...
- Saul Goodman: 'What did Tom Hagen do for Vito Corleone?'
- Walter H. White: 'I'm no Vito Corleone'
But the truth of that statement is up for you to debate upon. Just grab a drink and the remote!
Ice Age: Continental Drift (2012)
I think they're getting desperate now..
I saw this film yesterday, and in my opinion it was probably the 3rd best of the Ice Age films (with Dawn of the Dinosaurs no1) although the more i think about it, it could be the weakest of the series. Just to keep in mind I only give it a 1 star for how I felt disappointed as I feel the writers have tried too hard to make this work but the result was not up to the standard of the previous Ice Age movies . Sorry for anyone who disagrees. But let me start from the beginning.
It starts off with Scrap breaking the earth up with his nut which causes the continents to split up. Wow it seems when they're are no ideas it's Scrap who conveniently manages to create a story to work on (I'm not saying i dislike Scrap I just think the writers have started to overuse him, like in Ice Age-The Meltdown Scrap conveniently saves everyone by accident). Anyway, after the ice breaks up it then again conveniently breaks up right between Manny and his daughter Peaches (who is now like a teenager which I don't think works) and Ellie. Which leaves Sid Manny and Diego floating on an ice sheet out to sea. while Ellie,Peaches and everyone else is left on land.
Oh i forgot to mention Sid's parents return and dump his grandmother on Sid who is with the gang on the Ice Sheet. Although she didn't have all the lines she did prove to be the cause of a few laughs in the cinema and was quite a good addition to the gang. Next the ice sheet encounters Pirates where they commander Manny's Sids and Diegos 'ship' and take them as prisoners but almost instantly they break free and destroy the ship, although there is one ice sheet big enough for Manny, Diego Sid and his grandmother. Oh and also for female Sabertooth tiger who was part of the crew, I wonder what will happen there?
So when they were prisoners the crew say the way to get home is by a current on some island where Manny heads to on the ice. They reach there and find the pirates building another ship to try and find Manny, Diego and Sid. However, Diego, Sid and Manny take the ship with the help of these chipmunks. At one point I thought we were watching Alvin and the Chipmunks 3 or something? Anyway, the gang head home, but find Ellie and Peaches being held hostage by the Pirates who made another Ice Ship? *slaps forehead* So, you can see where this is going, Manny an the the Captain fight but what saves the day is Sids Granny who made a pet whale along the trip who tries to help them and helps fight the pirates, seriously? So after Granny's whale saves the day, everyone lives in happiness with the female tiger becoming part of the herd along with granny, i'm thinking the herd couldn't get any bigger. It's going to far.
There are too many subplots to start, I mean the subplot with Peaches is exactly the same as all the other teen stories. Girl mammoth likes good looking mammoth while 'good friend' the mole likes the Girl. Girl becomes one of them and says 'i don't like the mole', mole overhears and gets upset. Girl regrets and realises she likes who she was and not what the cool people want her to be, and that she had happiness all along. *again slaps forehead which is now bruising*.
Also, there's the subplot of the girl tiger who regrets being a pirate and wants to become good, blah blah blah. Oh and scraps story of trying to find 'Scraplantis' which is good as always with Scrap. But everything was to coincidental, cheesy and mixed for me.
There were some funny one liners but if you plan to watch this film for the story or the fact you liked the previous Ice Age like me, then don't. I know you will anyway out of curiosity but it kind of leaves the series on a low note. The writers should stop now as you can only milk a franchise for so long it becomes dull. It happened with Shrek 4, Pirates of the Caribbean 4, Indiana Jones4 and now Ice Age 4. Disappointing film for a great franchise.
Titanic - La leggenda continua (2000)
If this legend goes on...I might throw myself of a bridge
Where to start....so i was watching this with my 5 year old brother as he is really interested in Titanic but i didn't think he should see Cameron's version yet (or maybe skip the scene in the car)but still i decided to throw this one i found for 10p at a car boot sale. I finally know why!
Firstly, this film is an insult to the victims of Titanic, I mean the beginning when everyones boarding the ship and there's a bunch of gay mice and dogs. I thought i was watching bloody Noahs Ark. Im sorry but i never recalled Titanic (1997) to have singing Mexican mice while Leo and Kate are running away from being shot? Do you?
But anyway i decided to let that slide so i carry on and then we come across a rapping...wait for it...dog! So i look in depression at the screen wondering how a rapping dog could be on the ship. Sorry to rant about this part but i have issues with it: 1) So £1000 ticket for first main voyage of Titanic and it goes to a dog?..no! 2) umm sorry but rap is more 1990s not 1912? You don't hear of Mozart playing the end Sister Act song do you? I mean if your making a film at lest make so effort. and 3) Its a bloody RAPPING DOG! Jeez its fine in Olivers Company or other films like that but not the freaking TITANIC! Arrrhhh.. so by this point my brother almost fell unconscious by the stupidity of the film and asked me 'why are you punishing me?'.
Next on is...your going to love this...robbers who go on Titanic and ...wait need to build this one up.....they actually start to steal WHILE the ship is sinking and not even thinking they're gonna be dead soon, by this point I hope they all did...especially the BLOoDY DOG!! -.-
I could go on but i'll leave it there but ill add:
1) The animation is crap
2) The voices and music is cheesy and crap
3) The story of the love of a man and woman is the same as Camerons but the guy is rich and the girl is poor. *good original idea writers*!
4) The two evil stepmothers of the the main girl is actually not bad i mean i don't think they've ever done that befo....*cough.Cindarella.cough*
5) And the ending, happy ever after, the girl and guy survive and even the dog!....the BLOODY DOG! so they didn't even brush on the fact that over 1500 people died or the trail and errors that went on during the voyage..no no but on the the girl and guy surviving and marry and adopt kids, 'adopt' cause you cant never have sex with a woman isn't that right William :D
I mean it was all soo cheesy and crap. Its the worst gift I've given my brother and now we haven't spoken in over a year because of this film. But no seriously its crap, i think I've made my point! Ooh one more thing I hate that BLOODY DOG!