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Reviews
Banlieue 13 (2004)
20 Years Later, Still One of the Greats
We saw this a VERY long time ago, in early high school, when it first came out. This one and Ong Bak: The Thai Warrior came out around the same time, and bit torrent was super big for getting foreign movies here in America, and boy are we glad we discovered this one.
It's one of the greats for action films and its general sentiment throughout is "look how cool parkour is!" And that's not us making a slight, we agree "look how cool that parkour is!"
It's fun, it's French, It's balls to the walls dystopian 2010 (made in 2004) cops versus gangs. The best thing it has going for it, is that it looks, feels and flows like an independent film, while simultaneously feeling, flowing, and looking like a 90s Michael Bay summer blockbuster.
It's social commentary on the elite and their nature to shove the "less fortunate" into slums that they exploit through the drugs, sex, and gun trade, is all the more relevant now, as we actually move toward that dystopian future here in the human society of 2022-2023.
The Master of Disguise (2002)
Why the low rating?
Is it the Oscar winner of that year? Hell no! Is it one of the better early 2k's from Happy Madison? Yes, but you gotta be all in for the cast, the deep cut references to the other media... it's hard to explain.
Take for example the bad guy, it's Brent Spiner, Data from Star Trek. In this movie as the bad guy, he has a condition where every time he laughs too hard, he farts. It's comical to then be seeing "Data" laughing and farting like some bad meme.
Odd references and nerd connection like that are where this movie does hit home, but if you're not into it, YOU'RE DEFINITELY NOT INTO IT! But if you saw the trailer or even just the artwork for this one, and you went in expecting Oscar gold? Well that's on you.
The movie is enjoyable and has some groaners and dad jokes as well as deep cut references. Not a 3, but definitely not more than a 5 either.
The Changed (2021)
The Epitome of "Art is Subjective"
"Art is the uniting of the subjective with the objective, of nature with reason, of the unconscious with the conscious, and. Therefore art is the highest means of knowledge."
Had nothing to do with the production, so we're not just trying to "boost the rating". Genuinely enjoyed it and it reminded us of LUZ from Germany. Slow and methodic version of Invasion of the Body Snatchers. It's definitely not 10/10, but if people could just lower their expectations for a minute they might give higher than a 1 or 2.
Instead of aliens it's more along the same lines as The Faculy with a parasite or virus that is "evolving humanity", forcing us into what it considers better versions of ourselves, like a forced rapture.
Power Rangers (2015)
One of thr Lucky Few
Was one of the lucky few who got to see this before Sabaan took it down, and it was amazing! It's exactly what the show should've matured into instead of all those childish cash grab spin-offs.
It becomes about choice and deception instead of childish, infallible/immortal, heroes.
The general plot is that all the OG Rangers were basically deceived into thinking it was Zordon the prison guard, hiring them as lesser guards to keep Rita in her prison cell. When really it turns out that both Zordon and Rita were the problem, and this huge galactic war has been happening, led by the AI of the planet that Rita and Zordon are from, The Machine Empire.
Prisoners of the Ghostland (2021)
4.5? 4.5!?
The hell is wrong with you people? Are you that jaded or close minded that you can't have an imagination, think for yourself, or that you need everything spoon fed to you?
This movie is balls to the walls amazing, and one hell of a mystical trip from start to finish.
The Call (2020)
For fans of Hellraiser and Nightmare on Elm
Creepy and deliciously visceral and vicious. On par with other great horror of the same vein, Hellraiser and Nightmare on Elm specifically, questioning who we are with our lies that destroy others and the ghosts we create for ourselves.
Verdict:
Great horror, NSFW/NSFK (Not safe for kids)
HouseBroken (2021)
Pilot Was Good So Far
Think Secret Life of Pets, but for adults. I'll update as the show airs each week.
Bless the Harts (2019)
Dead After 2 Seasons
This IS a great show. I won't say was since you can still stream it. I'm disappointed that it got cancelled as I thought it was very funny.
But I suspected something was up during the end credits for the last episode of season 2. Watch it and you'll see what I mean.
Spiral: From the Book of Saw (2021)
Don't Listen to The Haters
Everyone hating on the movie is just mad their personal "what they wanted" didn't happen.
I'm a die hard fan of the SAW genre. I've never given a single one, even the sequels, less than a 9; and that was the prequel Jigsaw.
If you're a die hard like me, then you will LOVE this new installment. The duality of order and chaos are on full display yet again, and with poignant political growth. The ideals of chaos are alive in the copycats that embrace the ideology like cult fanatics as sleeper agents.
There's much more to expand on in this universe and I can't wait to see more!
No Escape (2015)
To the average movie goer it's a solid 7
This movie is completely up my alley in terms of content so of course I'll rate generously, I understand though that there were some holes and some lazy generic writing that drops it to a 7, maybe even a 6 if you just weren't into it. But it's good for a drama and very good for a coup story.
Young Sheldon (2017)
Ugh....
As if the show this spun from wasn't bad enough, you'd have to have the mental capacity of a third grader to find this funny.
The Descent (2005)
Seriously?
Hollow, gratuitous, and full of holes that will make you laugh; which seems contradictory to the point of a claustrophobic horror movie, especially one that takes itself WAY to seriously.
How this became "certified fresh" I'll never understand.
HouseBroken (2021)
Pilot Was Good So Far
Think Secret Life of Pets, but for adults. I'll update as the show airs each week.
The 2nd (2020)
Don't Trust My Review I'm Biased
I think it's a great and fun film. These types of movies have been around since I was a kid in the 90's so the nostalgia factor is through the roof. Add to that, that I am a HUGE fan of Casper Van Dien (you know, Johnny Rico from Starship Troopers?) and this movie was a win for me personally.
Sorry everyone else hated it. Were they expecting Oscar level gold? It's a movie. Shut up and enjoy it.
Birdgirl (2021)
Don't Compare It To Harvey Birdman
While they may exist in the same universe, this and Harvey are vastly different in terms of direction, plot, and purpose, and that's a great thing!
I love Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law but its' general purpose was to pit and question the ethics, plot holes, and often weirdness of the Hannah Barbera era. The references and jokes would be completely lost on the current generation of Adult Swim viewers, as Hannah Barbera content is not easy to access now. The only channel that shows it is Boomerang and its a premium extra for cable/streaming, so many don't opt for it, and Cartoon Network does not at all show them anymore like they did when I was a kid.
Birdgirl is a perfect evolution of where the series universe needed to go now that both Harvey and Phil are dead. Harvey died in that special and the premise of Birsgirl is that Phil is dead so Judy/Birdgirl had to take-over and run a company, NOT RUN A LAW FIRM!
That's the key difference everyone seems to be missing from their reviews. The company is no longer a sleezy take and case law firm, and is now a fortune level investment company.
And... I mean, come on! Birdcat! How can you not love it?
We are also only 3 episodes in, give it a chance. Even Harvey needed you to stick with it for a bit before it took off. Don't deny it, Harvey had a slow first season as well.
If you are enjoying this, I highly recommend a SyFy show called Don't Feed the Humans about a space zoo where a group of humans from different time era's are all forced to be and exhibit in said zoo.
Thunder Force (2021)
Had early promise but...
The movie quickly delves into the standard PG-13 affair of bad pop culture reference jokes that will only appeal to the most brainwashed and brain dead social media magnets that never detach from Facebook or Twitter long enough to be a human. Loose ends are glossed over and just tied up with a general "We got 'em! Thanks team!" If this is what's going to start passing for more female centric and female empowered content for younger females to look up to, we are in a bunch of trouble...
Soul (2020)
For A Movie Called Soul It Lacks One
Plots are left unfinished and unresolved, characters are not valued and are instead used as plot devices to drive the story, the overall message is ambiguous at best, and it just doesn't have that "pop" that other Pixar movies have. For starters, Connie, the girl who played trombone. Her character is so poorly treated and used, I actually felt sorry for it. She was only used to progress the two scenes she was in, and the dropped like she didn't matter after she talked to 42? 22? Whatever the characters name was. Side not: isn't it sad that I remember Connie the side character better than I remember the name of the main character? The movie is just a huge mess with tons of loose ends that never tie up. It's cool when it's supposed to be some grand sci-fi thinker about life, the universe, and existence, but thats not what people generally expect from PIXAR. And it is definitely NOT done well in this movie.
Black Site (2018)
Garunteed hit for fans of the genre
Headline says it all. You into anime? Elder gods or HP Lovecraft? And yeah, low budget sci-fi, but it's better than Sharknado and that low budget crap.
Action Jackson (1988)
80s Fun Thats Been Revived By the Most Unknown Show
Fun 80's movie with absurd action and plot, but still fun, and thanks to Lazor Wolf this past week, we all know this movie is a documentary! Lol.
Unbelievable!!!!! (2020)
Well Worth It for Niche Fans
Basically, if you grew up on Star Trek and then discovered Marijuana and Snoop Dog, it's the movie for you. Just about everyone from Star Trek: Nichelle Nichols & Walter Keonig, TNG: Mirna Sirtis & Michael Dorn, Deep Space 9: Kira, Voyager: Harry Kim & Tuvok, and even Enterprise: Trip, showed up. Throw in the marionette hero all Thunderbirds style, and it's a winner for those interested.
Valentine (2001)
Still Great
I just watched this classic again for the umpteenth time and I still love it.
Deep Blue Sea 2 (2018)
Loved Every Minute
I don't know where this aired but I'm guessing Sci-Fi (SyFy), as I've been an avid viewer of their content for about 30 years now, and this feels like their general vibe.
It goes from re-make, to fear of A.I in one swing and at that point all bets are off! Somehow a half chewed corpse was able to jump up out of the water and slam her half eaten face against the window but is obviously not moving so she is dead and couldn't have jumped out of survival. And an underwater blowtorch wards off a heard of viscous babies!?
If you dont die laughing, you have no sense of humor.
Teleios (2017)
Solid 7
I already have a soft spot for low budget sci-fi's, I watch the Sci-Fi channel (SYFY).
What hooked me to watch in the first place was the basic premise, which falls along the same lines as Event Horizon.
What followed was a mishmash of EH, Dead Space, Infini, Supernova, 2001, and Passengers.
It's well worth the watch, and is better than half the crap netflix has, *cough* lost in space *cough*.
Excuse me, I had some crap stuck in my throat there.
Its definitely not a 4/10 movie, but anything higher than a 7, is being generous.
It's almost like watching if the original Star Trek from the 60's, were being made now with its low budget and bad special effects.
But if one low budget Trek can be good, this Trek can be too.
Big Trouble (2002)
Hilariously Underrated
If you dont laugh at this movie, you're broken. Fantastic cast, hilarious twists and one liners,
Siesta Key (2017)
Haven't Even Seen an Episode
Wait this is a real show? I though this was like one of those joke shows that only ever has previews or commercials. A troll show like something Adult Swim would do.
MTV has recently branded itself as a "stoner friendly channel" so I thought they were just trolling all of us stoners.
The fact that a show like this even exists is the reason humanity is dying. Self absorbed, bratty, entitled children whose biggest problem in life is that someone didnt like their S/O or didnt like their decision, when more than likely the S/O or decision had no bearing on others. Just bored rich crappy people picking on their supposed friends and family because they're bored and crappy