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Reviews
The Walking Dead: World Beyond (2020)
Better Idea
AMC should bring back Z Nation (Syfy can suck it), let the Asylum continue to film it, and cancel this drivel.
Død snø (2009)
Game Over US
Norwegian film makers get it. This is how to make a cool movie; balance the humor and horror, special effects that don't over power the movie, and most importantly: actors that care what they are doing and do it well! Fritt Vilt one and two (Two not being as good as the first, but that's the norm) were leagues over what Hollywood has put out in over 20 years, just small budget horror from people who care what they put out. My only complaint is that it's hard to get these movies in North America and even harder to get English subtitles, but that is in no way a knock to these fine movies. If you can get hold of the these films and are a horror buff, find them, you won't be disappointed. Keep it up Norway!!!!!!
Day of the Dead (2008)
Not too bad...
I hate remakes. I hate the talk of remakes. I don't think anyone should do a remake unless they stick to the original story and double the original budget...and leave the computer effects out.
Not that this is really a remake as it has nothing to do with the original, with the exception of zombies and the docile zombie Bud/Bub. This could have done very well on it's own, not really needing to associate itself with the superior original. I usually rant and rave against remakes, but i actually liked this one. I just mentally removed the fact that it was a remake of the kick-a** original, sat back and enjoyed it for what it was...a low budget zombie flick. And you have to remember, Land of the Dead was pretty craptacular, so even Romero seems to have lost his edge...probably some years ago.
I have to address the key issue with the Humvee though. Anyone in the military would know that in a civilian setting, if you left your vehicle, you would padlock the steering wheel if you had to leave it. Seeing as you don't need a key to start it, anyone could take it. Also, if these guys are in the Army, the hats are wrong (berets) as are the t-shirts (brown not black,black is Air Force). I could go on because military inconsistencies really bother me, but I leave it with the prior two.
While the hyper speed freak zombie creatures are so popular at the moment, I still don't like them. Why do they need to crawl walls and super jump? How does a virus change the human form so drastically that this is possible? Things like this really bother me. Logic people, logic! Negatives aside, I still like this movie. The acting wasn't all that bad for this caliber of film. I didn't think the script was too shoddy either, certainly there is far worse. I really enjoyed the F/X because of the use of REAL latex, not CGI garbage. There was some CGI, but it was far better than usually used in this caliber of film.
Go into this with no connection to the original and you will enjoy it. Eventually someone will come to the rescue of the zombie genre and right things.
Knight Rider: Knight Rider (2008)
Couldn't have done a worse job.
Please quit saying "Don't compare this to the original!" If the makers of this drivel didn't want comparisons, they would have named this disaster "Mustang of Justice".
Like everyone has said before, it's like watching a 2 hour Ford commercial. Where is the Trans-Am??????? Why don't you remake Herbie with a Honda Civic? I was expecting an American Idol to pop out of the car and start singing. Also like mentioned before, the sex and innuendos in the movie were heavy handed and completely unnecessary. The acting, and indeed the script, was sub-par. Remember when comparing the acting and scripting to the original that the original was filmed 20 some years ago and you'd think some progress would have been made in these areas. Why is it so hard to remake this and other classic shows? I bet if Hollywood took the original scripts, some decent actors, and filmed things all over again, it would be 2000% better than this corporate, overly sexed, poorly acted, low budget drivel that is being forced on viewers today. Get off your collective lazy a*ses Hollywood and do something properly for once. If you can't do your jobs, turn the keys over to someone who can. How can the SciFi channel (who makes some truly awful movies) produce BSG, an over the top remake of a classic, but NBC with all it's money can not even come close to making a show half as good? And while i'm at it...Mike Rowe should have been KITT's voice!!
I Am Legend (2007)
Why Bother
I don't know why Hollywood can't leave good enough alone. While i won't pretend that i've read the book, i have seen the two proceeding films. The Last Man On Earth wan't my favorite either, but i think it was a far better film. The Omega Man is my favorite of the three. Way more story, character development, and back story. This current movie looked like a cheep take-off of the 28 days camp, but not as well done. I don't understand the need for super fast vampires and zombies, looking like mutated crack Olympian track stars. Why was the Omega Man better? Because the sick people just hated Heston because he was normal. There was no over hyped fx taking over the movie and ruining the story.
Return to House on Haunted Hill (2007)
Don't know where to begin...
Boy, oh boy! It's like Hollywood doesn't even want us to go see movies anymore. This is a perfect example on how to completely ruin any chance on a cool series. The special effects were OK, but even low budget movies are approaching this level now...enough with the cheesy computer effects!! The quality of the fx were even lower in this than in the first movie. A scary nurse with only white, black, and grey makeup on? Woooooo!!! Super scary boys and girls!! And how the commando guy was quartered? I never knew a person EXPLODED when their limbs were torn off!!!!!! The tight camera shots and the spastic shaking (which i am most tired of seeing in movies) in most action scenes just go to show how little they spent on the sets, except for spider webs, was there some kind of crazy sale at the f/x store? The actors had the amazing ability to keep a strait face in uttering some of the worst dialogue i may have ever heard this side of an ED Wood movie. It is possible that the script was penned by the children of the studio execs, that would certainly clear a lot up. The actors also seem to have been told to show a complete lack of emotion during filming. I can understand fresh faces and all, but the acting in this was absolutely awful, no redeeming quality. Most situations in the movie are completely absurd, make no sense what so ever, and leave you wondering exactly who this is targeted at. This was filmed poorly, acted poorly, financed poorly, written poorly...you get the idea. Stay away from this. I watch bad horror for fun, lots of them. Want to see good/bad? See Santa's Slay, thats good, this is just horrid. It makes you wonder how Hollywood can complain that we movie goers don't see enough movies. When crappy movies like this keep getting pumped out by the dozen, lowering our IQ's by double digits, it's easy to see why Hollywood is imploding on itself. Note to Hollywood: Stop making these movies, save your money...a lot of it. Now hire some real script writers, don't let ANYONE revise the scripts! Make some really nice, large sets. Invest in some quality actors, but do they really need to make 20mill a film??? Some countries don't even have this kind of money! If they balk at a pay reduction...fire them. I'm sure they will be fine. Find camera people without nervous disorders. And remember, athletes, wrestlers, musicians, and friends of the family are NOT actors!!