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Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (2011)
If you loved the last three, I'd avoid this one....
After watching "On Stranger Tides" as far as I'm concerned, Pirates of the Caribbean is a trilogy. Penelope Cruz made a terrific Pirate Wench, and the Design of the film, as always was visually stunning. Not to mention it was actually a brilliant relief to watch a 'Pirates' film without the annoyances of Keira Knightly and Orlando Bloom's whiny acting. However, despite this, the film was really not great. The script was a lot poorer than its predecessors, as was the plot. The make-up was very very wrong and was distractingly modern throughout the film- not befitting the era or the mood. Some of the cinematography was surprisingly low-grade, especially in dark shots, and I was surprised some frames made the editing process (such as a frame with a large water globule on the camera lens, completely ruining any realism left). And that was another thing, the vague supernatural elements in the previous films seemed apt and 'in-place', yet these ideas were taken way to far in this film... since when was Blackbeard a wizard? However, the thing that bothered me the most about this film was the Christian moral values. Please don;t get me wrong, I have nothing at all against Christianity in anyway whatsoever, it's just when I go to see a film like this I do not expect to have it shoved down my throat at every opportunity. It seems that the writer/director deemed it necessary to have all the sin in the film toned-down, and that it was essential to have 'Christianity' win over all, with the incredibly sickeningly annoying 'Orlando-Bloom-esq' Missionary, who JUST WOULDN'T DIE!!! Normally I would suggest going to see this film just for good ol Captain Jack Sparrow.... but alas, even this classic character has been given a revamp, turning him into a bit of a 'Goody-goody' by the end of the film. Overall, I would say avoid it. Maybe see it out of curiosity if you must, or even just for the visual design of Blackbeard's ship. But if you're expecting another classic to add to the trilogy you will be sorely disappointed.
Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid (1982)
Immature Rubbish- Classic Film Fans beware!
A simply moronic film that I doubt can even be loosely described as a comedy (unless jokes repetitive jokes about boobs make you guffaw with laughter). It wastes no time in befouling the grave of classic Noir with Steve Martin's usual brand of dim-witted, inane, unfunny claptrap. A real endurance test to sit through it in its entirety. Conversely, in its concept the film is 'one of a kind', and some of the splices are done very well, some are very clumsy. It is an interesting concept to use clips from old movies as part of the plot, but one more befitting of a film student's experiment than a mainstream feature film, and was certainly not enough to redeem the film of its blistering asinine ineptitude.
King Lear (1970)
It's Brilliant, but I wouldn't recommend it
It was a really good film... but I HATED IT. Objectively, it was a really fantastic and apt adaptation of the play, but subjectively, I would have rather watched paint dry. Set in some desolate, almost dystopian, icy, barren landscape; the production design was brilliant and unique, perfectly capturing the desperation of the play. Unlike so many other filmic Shakespeare adaptations, it actually worked really well as a movie, and made the most of "film" as a medium; making the set and the costumes add to the feel of the play. However... It was dull, boring, tortuously long, depressing.... I couldn't stand it. I'm a Shakespeare fan, and I thought I knew this play, but the adaptation still left me thoroughly confused, primarily because I struggle with faces, and every character looked exactly the same. Overall, I'd say steer very clear unless you are a very dedicated King Lear fan, or a very dedicated Peter Brook fan.
Profondo rosso (1975)
He's absolutely trying to kill me, y'know?
The quote sums up the whole film: ludicrous. A stupid, ridiculous film, redeemed only slightly by some original suspense sequences- alas about the only "Original" thing about the entire film. I went into this wanting to love it, and I'm very hard to disappoint when it comes to horror, if it's a good horror then great, if it's a bad horror then (usually) even better! However, this particular film was not even so bad that it was good.... it was just plain bad. I could not wait for it to end. The film was naive, unclear, completely disjointed and unthought-through. It's almost as if a group of 12 yr olds wrote the plot: playing on every nonsensical horror cliché in the book, and not bothering to link any of it together. In saying this, the directing and camera-work was pretty amazing, sadly not amazing enough to completely redeem the film. There are some really original shots and sequences, but overall a thoroughly rudimentary thriller.
Stranger on the Third Floor (1940)
Wonderful, short and sweet
Without a doubt, what seems to me to be a classic Noir, despite what some critics say. Beautiful, atmospheric, and unique cinematography with heavy influences from German Expressionism. A Marvelous Freudian dream sequence, which like the rest of the film SCREAMS "David Lynch". A chilling and exciting thriller with a neat and satisfying circular narrative. Lorre's performance is fantastic, and although the flashbacks seem clunky at times, it is overall an incredibly successful short-film, showing perfectly what today's modern cinema needs to learn- that sometimes less is more. Would recommend it highly to anyone, and in my opinion: a great way to spend a spare hour. 8.5/10
Killing Bono (2011)
"Ok Tiger, Let's get you socially lubricated"
I really wanted to like this film, I really did, but in reality it was simply mediocre. However, it is worth saying that I went into this film not knowing anything about it, and most of the criticisms I formed whilst watching it were made before I found-out that the whole thing was actually based on a true story , which somehow absolves the film of a lot of its sins: The plot was long and meandering, yet bore an uncanny resemblance to the film "Rock Star" (Mark Wahlberg at his finest...?). The acting was questionable bar a great performance from Pete Postlethwaite as the lovable gay landlord. It really bothered me that the band's music (the McCormick Brothers +Shook-up) was actually really good up until their point of stardom when suddenly their musical style was transformed into something that sounded about as 80s as Fall Out Boy... I don't know how much of the soundtrack were original songs written by the band, but I'd be shocked if I found out that the song "Where we want to be" (for example) was an eighties classic. However, there are some criticisms that cannot be excused by the story's supposed authenticity and origins in fact... For example, the film didn't seem to know what it was, too funny to be taken seriously, too dramatic to be a comedy. Therefore many of the jokes were wasted. Despite my aspersions, it has to be said that the casting for the character of "Bono" was impeccable and that added dramatically to the quality of the film- grounding it in reality. Overall, I would say - Questionable acting - Brilliant Casting - A bit on the long side
Touch of Evil (1958)
Deeply disappointing
This film was so highly recommended, and having taken on a project to watch as many Film Noirs as possible, I was shocked when this "Orson Welles Masterpiece" did not live up to expectations. The plot was hard to follow, and none of the characters were remotely engaging. I feel the film really missed a trick by introducing the audience to 2 potentially powerful female characters at the beginning of the film and then not going any deeper into the characters. I was disappointed at the "damsel in distress" take on the female role in the film, completely ignoring any classic femme-fatale traits that could make a mediocre film like this that little bit more engaging. Any film Noir techniques used within the film (particularly within the cinematography) seemed heavy-handed and borrowed from earlier films. There seemed little in this film that hadn't already been explored in earlier Film Noirs. If you're looking (as I was) for a Classic Orson Welle's Noir Masterpiece, then I suggest you watch the much better, much more original: Lady From Shanghai.