Change Your Image
dieterperras
Reviews
Resident Evil: Damnation (2012)
Well I liked it
Its better then resident evil retribution lets just get that out there right now OK. good lets continue....
yes the enemies are ridiculously evil and bullets have no effect on the important characters, but I'm in the sort of mood where I'm willing to overlook the flaws in Resident Evil Damnation or RED for short, which is good because there are a LOT of flows in RED. This is probably the effect of watching it right after watching RER or resident evil redemption.
Its good to finally see Hollywood make a movie that actually follows along with the storyline of the original work its only a shame that they did it with resident evil because The Resident Evil is written by Capcom, a company to which writing is the same as throwing some plots in a blender and stitching them loosely together to make something vaguely understandable.
The characters were well portrayed and voiced well and the creatures were interesting but unfortunately it fell into the old death trap of having the weaker creatures seeming to vanish as tougher ones appeared and when they brought out the giants I was like "cool I remember those from one of the games." But that initial interest quickly died after the 7th f***** one appears out of nowhere with not so much as a single zombie in between.
But at least its fun to watch and as I said before its better then RER.
Resident Evil: Retribution (2012)
the worst so far
resident evil retribution. Now I haven't played much of the games and haven't seen the movies a lot but even so this movie bugged me.
First off I'd like to say that all those RE fans out there who say that anyone who hasn't played resident evil four thousand times and doesn't have a chart detailing its plot has no business rating the movies are morons.
Now with that aside I can actually go into the movie a bit.
The special effects were awesome, and the sound track matched it beautifully as well as the action scenes being very well done but that's not why I've put it down as the worst Resident Evil movie out there.
As stories go this ones about as weak as a sparrow with brittle bone disease. Apparently the writers have figured out that no human in their right mind would look at what's happening and go "Yep, this can't possible go badly for me at all!" So they've had to bring back the red queen from the first movie to be the big baddie but hold on! Wasn't the red queen supposed to be trying to contain the virus in the first movie? Wasn't she portrayed as just misguided? Wered this sudden blood lust come from? And it goes completely unexplained as to why, the film seemingly preferring to try and distract viewers with more bright explosions.
The other "big twist" is that umbrella mass clones people but hold on again! How did that get overlooked! I mean that would make for one awkward scene in the umbrella soldiers locker room surely! Giving an excuse for those soldiers from the first movie to make an appearance as umbrella soldiers and rather then them getting shot its the guards wearing masks that do. But then the whole place floods in the next scene killing them all, so how much would it have changed anything for even one of them to have died before hand?
Another thing that annoyed me was when the zombie soldiers showed up in Moscow. I mean come on! I can accept zombies with guns but zombies with guns on motorcycles? That's just too far...
There's also a part in the movie where a giant monster grabs a little girl but rather then instantly killing her like it has every other person its even come near to it decides to take her back to its den so alice can go save her, I think that pathetic attempt at story line speaks for itself...
In short resident evil retribution is good for mindless shooty,zombie killing,exploisiony fun. just don't expect anything else or you'll be disappointed.
Enclave (2002)
Hitler in game form
First off I would like to say that I never actually finished Enclave. And for a while after I stopped playing I started to think "why did I stop playing this game?" Then I started playing again and was like "Oh yea now I remember! Because its f***ing evil!!" Its what would have happened if Hitler were brought back in game form.
The story goes that your an knight trapped in prison which is then attack by outlanders and you escape and meet the queen and the rest just becomes a blur in my head....I remember there being a princess kidnapping being involved which is about as original as Nintendo coming out with a new Mario game (Which incidentally has a princess kidnapping involved as well). What I'm trying to say is that the story's sh** and is told through a mix of cut scenes and random paragraphs during loading screens which are about as much us as a rusty spoon to a cockroach seeing as how you'll end up skipping most of them any ways.
The game play is the only good thing that I can say about this game, the actual combat (and the sound track as well)were swords and shields all impact like you'd expect and you'd be surprised at how awesome it feels to slash someone's groin block their next attack, sidestep. and slice them in half all without button mashing or the bore of clicking on the enemy multiple times! This awesome feeling is then utterly destroyed when the game decides to randomly spawn four shadow skeletons around you which are each tougher then you and then goes "oh look at that, you died you cocky bastard now we're going to make you restart the ENTIRE F***ing LEVEL!"
Whatever happened to check points? I thought we'd perfected this technology, and now I'm going to say it another time just to make it clear CHECK POINTS! CHECK POINTS! Mother F***ing CHECK POINTS! And if your going to not use check points then at least don't send us back to the bloody map room ever time we die. And by God you'll die a lot. The game expects you to play each level at least 10 times just to figure out were each bloody instant kill enemy is and then sits back and goes "ha ha now you've got to restart again!"
You know what Enclave? No, no I'm just leaving you this one now. To summarize the experience, playing Enclave can be equated to sifting through a pile of S*** for a single piece of chocolate. Sure the chocolate will taste good but it will not last long and you'll quickly lose your appetite for it once you realize that it was still smeared with s***.