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Oldboy (2013)
Boy oh boy...
I'll be brief, because I feel I've already wasted too much time.
If you know the original and found it intriguing, exciting, innovating and even a bit scary, then STOP! The remake is annoying, boring, pretentious and did I mention boring?
If you don't know the original, WATCH IT and don't waste your time with this uninspiring piece of crap.
And finally, I'm a fan of Sam Jackson, but wasn't snakes on a plane enough?
To comply with the guidelines I have to write another few sentences, so here's some advice. Watch the vengeance trilogy with subtitles if you like this genre.
Body Language (2011)
It hurts my eyes!!!
If you've read the storyline, you might already notice it's not a great story. From the beginning till the end the storyline is based on too many coincidences and is painfully predictable.
Wait! It gets even worse. The acting isn't sub par, it's atrocious. I couldn't get into the movie even once. Especially one crying scene, which was probably meant to be very emotional, I honestly felt ashamed instead of the actress.
You might think "So? It's a dance movie. As long as the dancing is good, I'd watch it." Think again. These are good dancers, don't get me wrong, but the editing was disappointing to say the least and the choreo was just sad. They even used computer animation on some dances. This should have made it better, but it made it so much worse.
Finally at the end of the movie I actually felt like crying myself. Wasted my time and I felt like scratching my eyes out. That's how annoying this movie was. If that was the goal of the movie, then it's brilliant, if not, it sucks balls.