cscigu Reviews

Take Shelter (2011)

Please hear my plea; this is not for thee. Avoid.

[4/10 · 6 May 2024]

Incessant drip, drip, drip of movie water torture.

Obviously, the lead was told something like "Go out there, and act like you're incapable of not only of acting, but even existing."

No one behaves this way around family, friends, dogs, motor vehicles. He's not an "everyman" at all; he's a "everythingamanisnot man". I don't care if he's Coo-Coo for Coco-puffs, its not happening.

Did someone superglue his lips to his teeth?

Does he understand that his wife is an out-of-the-park catch, and great mom piled on top? Nah, lets gets flaked out and run her off.

Doesn't he know women are afraid of cellars more that spiders?

Its just a horrible movie, and we have to watch some illogical moron shoot down his life and family in the process.

Fool Me Once (2024)

One of the worst prominent streaming series of 2023-2024

[4/10 · 16 January 2024]

In the future, should you seek a series that looked like a 2023 Artificial Intelligence produced mini-series, this would be it.

Glossy, no substance, mostly AI looking actors plodding thru a mass-produced effort at something original that spectacularly fails. Such expected, diverse, yet mundane characters could hardly have recreated themselves by a natural process. Then, those characters all perform at a miserable level, for the most part.

How long are we going to be shoved a strong female lead clothes-horse that relishes in physically dominating and assaulting men twice her size, but appears she couldn't hold her own in a as a kindergarten assistant? Posh, beautiful, couldn't park a Range Rover at a supermarket; yet manages to be an elite, rogue military helicopter pilot with American-envy? Retchingly bad.

Weak, sickly, properly less-than-masculine male characters. A pharmaceutical villain in the wings, rich widows in massive country estates, literal glass houses and kids to trot out before shuffling off to nannies.

It is a horror of systemic 2023 insecurities and pandering.

The Terminal List (2022– )

You obviously should not trust an IMDB review.

[6/10 · 24 July 2022]

To start, I'm giving in six stars simply due to its fluff entertainment value. That's the only value this series has.

Every scene is purely 21 Century TV puff entertainment. All that phony commando lingo, ridiculous lack of professional behavior. Never once anything close to an actual, factual world. The script could have come from a computer based on modern fallacy of war, life, and military life. Never does it brush with reality.

It you make it thru one episode, you've suspended disbelief totally, and might enjoy it. If you ever try to weigh any "how could that happen?" type thoughts, you're sunk.

It would have been much better if they could have at least got something like haircuts, housing, cars, closer.

The Tower (2021–2023)

Just more pandering to stereotype, from across the fence

[3/10 · 22 December 2021]

In a day and age where stereotyping is considered the ultimate in poor taste, even a former MET officer is willing to look the other way in order to make a sale, it seems.

This is just typical 2000's rehearsed, retreaded fodder. Basically pick out some characters with the currently acceptable skin and gender to make villains, and the use the remaining skin and gender types as the heroes.

From the outset it was clear who would be whom.

Crime (2021– )

Tiring, overwrought box-ticker

[4/10 · 20 December 2021]

Over-acting, over-emoting, overdone mess. Constant, up to the minute references to slights, social justices, gender, race, etc. Every possible avenue to lead the characters into some contemporary societal drivel gets lobbed in here.

The actual plot takes a far away back seat, to the point its almost lost amid the melodrama and angst. Very tough to stick out. Painful, actually.

True Story (III) (2021)

Disappointing, disjointed and wastes good plot.

[5/10 · 29 November 2021]

I thought this would be a can't miss hit for Kevin Hart. Serio-comic mini-series that highlights his talent area, but gives him a bit more to do.

They gave him the "more to do" part, but missed out on his real talents. The plot had some pretty obvious chances to really be funny, and off to the races, but consistently missed them. Instead, its chock-full of amateurish sounding dialogue, trendy cliches, and is horribly repetitive. Over and over with the same lame stuff. The writing is just poor.

I'm sticking it out, 4 episodes in but feel like this one came up way short. Yeah, short. Kevin Hart, right.

Garnet's Gold (2014)

Schmaltzy view of an unremarkable situation

[4/10 · 15 April 2021]

Really nothing to gawk at here. A very typical man that has shirked responsibility and failed to work toward any goal now finds himself rather hollow as his older years set in. He's reaping what he has sown. I guess some can identify with, or hope to avoid this regret. My regret is having wasted some of my time with it.

The main goal here is to go on a trek to recreate a happenstance event that he has inflated to the nth degree in his mind.

Lots of expansive camera work showing this unremarkable man standing with the horizon at his back. Purely the natural outcome of one's reactions set among some scenic, sometimes dreary Scottish landscapes.

Lupin (2021– )

A shame. This could be good if not so stupid.

[2/10 · 30 January 2021]

From the outset the series is outlandishly ridiculous, completely improbable and full of frustrating plot mistakes.

The hero is the most daring master thief in France, pulls of impossible heists with unlimited resources, escapes from any location, yet is too dumb to take the smallest precautions with invaluable evidence against his arch-rival.

The police are, of course, inept and/or corrupt throughout, and the master thief plays them at every turn.

Every episode has groaningly bad faults ruining the entire show. The basic story is interesting, though, and could have been quite good with minimally competent writing. Sadly, it just doesn't have it. Pretty awful.

Jack Ryan (2018–2023)

Is this a Krasinski produced vanity piece?

[4/10 · 6 November 2019]

In Re: Season 2 I've seen Krasinski's name listed as a producer. This would explain volumes, as I'v thought Krasinski was so horribly miscast as Jack Ryan. Even trying to forget his "Office" persona, nothing works with him as a soldier, intellect, spy, etc. He just doesn't have the chops. Every time someone says "Dr Ryan" I am forced to snort in disapproval. Ridiculous notion.

Season 2 just gets it more wrong. Now, he's sporting the trendy mandatory scruffy beard, which make him look even less serious, and further unbelievable. He's still got the Gold's Gym makeover, but manages to make nothing of it physically, generally getting beaten up or outrun when the fun starts.

The plot? It starts OK, then turns into a lame outing more akin to a TV Star Trek script.

Its aggravating. The budget, filming, and locations are great. Put almost any other lead in there, tone down the gung-ho and it would be watchable.

Unbelievable (2019)

Its powerful because it is not believable

[6/10 · 30 September 2019]

As a long time veteran of a police dept much larger than either of those in this story, I can tell you that there is little chance this is a good portrayal of the way these cases unfolded. The whole bit of the super-driven detective bossing around a bunch of subordinates like a kindergarten teacher is horrible, Hollywood schlock. Detectives that work cases do not dress down a uniformed officers, and are not called "Detective" by their peers. Telling a uniformed Sgt (a supervisor who would outrank her) how to conduct his team? Never. Netflix has a pattern with this. Mindhunter, and the Ted Kacyznski Manhunt show, are wildly fictionalized. The crimes may be accurately portrayed, but the people involved in the investigations are mostly romanticized, drama-injected fictional characters. This has to be the same bit, as "detectives" like this just don't fly. Its how the writer wants the story to look.

Manhunt (II) (2017–2020)

This is not accurate in the least.

[2/10 · 7 January 2019]

Sadly, if you do just a little research into the case, its plain that little of what you see in this TV show is true. Fitzgerald had only a minor role in the investigation. He never met the the Unabomber, never questioned him, and did not write the search warrant as depicted in the series. Fitzgerald was a paid consultant for the series, which explains his exploded importance here. What a crock.

DCI Banks (2010–2016)

Does this get better? Horrible, ridiculous, unrealistic start.

[2/10 · 21 July 2018]

Just watched the two-part first episode, Aftermath. I simply can't believe anyone, anywhere would think this show bore any resemblance to reality. Banks is a ferret faced mess skittering around like a 15 year old with the keys to a Ferrari, yet is supposed to be a seasoned, ranking detective? The plot was laughable in its assumptions, every scene involved suspending disbelief in one form or another. People just do not react or behave as depicted here.

Worst of all, you're asked to accept something that could never happen in the first place, then have the whole plot built on top of that. Maybe I should try to jump to another season. This was a cringe-fest.

25th Hour (2002)

Contrived crap

[3/10 · 12 September 2013]

From the outset a melodramatic mash of contrived accents, contrived situations and contrived characters.

For crying out loud, the movie begins with some skinny "gangster" in a leather trench coat rescuing a dog, which his Russian heavy refers to as a "bull pit" from some Brooklyn Bridge looking location. Of course, hauling it off in the trunk of his super slick, pristine vintage canary yellow Super Bee.

When will these Hollywood directors learn that nobody really drives old 60s-70s muscle cars around in real life? Let alone in NYC?

What an assault on the sensible.