chester-gray Reviews

Rocket Robin Hood (1966–1969)

Terrible.

[9 May 2005]

This had to be one of the worst, poorly made cartoons ever. The lip-syncing was almost always completely off, the plots were stupid and and the dialogue wasn't much better. Even for the sixties, it was poorly animated. I am shocked that something this bad could come out of Canada. Maybe part of it is also the setting. You have all the original characters from Robin Hood, like Maid Marion, Prince John, etc living a thousand years in the future fighting off a bunch of robotic enemies and other futuristic creatures. Not worth watching at all. I can't believe they stop airing the Flintstones on Teletoon Retro for the sake of this.

Volcano (1997)

Disturbingly realistic....

[25 November 2004]

*MAY INCLUDE SPOILERS* Along with Deep Impact, Volcano was the greatest action movie of the 1990's. Tommy Lee Jones' and Anne Heche's acting is superb. It is realistic in that your life could be turned upside down in an instant. Most cities don't have to worry about a volcano liquidating them, but it could happen. There were heartwarming scenes throughout the film, particularly at the end when Mike, Kelly, and the little boy emerge from the rubble of the collapsed building. (I know in actuality they couldn't have survived, but use your imagination.) Then afterwards the little boys looks around at everyone caked in dirt and says,"Look at their faces, they all look the same." This movie truly was an A+.

The Cola Conquest (1998)

Not very impressive.....

[1 May 2004]

I recently watched this documentary and I must say that I found it to be quite boring. It was basically about how Cola is a multi-billion industry, and how the market is getting more competitive all the time. If you ask me, though, they could have presented it in a more interesting fashion.

*****/10

Bowling for Columbine (2002)

A Michael Moore

[10/10 · 28 March 2004]

This has got to be one of the most thought provoking and yet entertaining films of all time. The way that Michael Moore took a documentary on such a serious issue as gun violence, and present it in such a comical fashion, was truly excellent. I especially liked the segment called "A Brief History of America." Moore really opened up my eyes to the severity of the gun problem in America and made me appreciate even more that I live in such a relatively safe country like Canada. The film is also quite critical of American politicians and the American people in general for being so violent and gun obsessed. I'm no sure if Moore got an Oscar for this, but he certainly deserved one. A truly fantastic film, A+

The Simpsons (1989– )

Okay....

[23 February 2004]

(This is a follow-up to a comment I made on Jan 27th, 2003.) I followed the advice of J Wellington Peevis and took some time off from his show. The other night, I watched my first new episode in nearly a year. And to be honest, it wasn't half bad. It still had a lot of problems, like having to continuously kill off Lisa's cats to fill up and entire half hour, but it wasn't as bad as I remember it being a year ago.

I give it a 6 1/2, up from less than five stars last year.

The White Caps (1905)

Pretty good.

[16 February 2004]

The overall quality of this film impressed me, for something that was made nearly a century ago.

Beethoven's 5th (2003 Video)

Again?

[16 February 2004]

I can't believe they are still making these films. In my opinion, they should have quit while they were ahead, after about the second or third film. But FIVE? Hardly any filmmakers make five installments unless they are incredibly stupid.

Dying at Grace (2003)

Truly excellent....

[15 February 2004]

This was a very moving insight the thoughts and feelings of five people during their final few days on this earth. Having very compassionate health care workers to talk to about death and the afterlife. Some moments in the documentary nearly brought me to tears. If you get the chance, watch it, but I do NOT recommend it for young children, as there are some disturbing scenes.

Mega Babies (1999–2000)

Absolutely revolting....

[23 December 2003]

This is the most disgusting animated program I have ever seen. It does even come close to being funny. I don't know who in their right mind would ever think a bunch of babies running around throwing boogers and feces at each other is humorous. I don't even think a three year old child would enjoy this. Do yourself a favour, even if you are dying of boredom, and there's nothing else to watch on TV but infomercials, DO NOT WATCH THIS SHOW!

Sabrina the Teenage Witch (1996 TV Movie)

Kinda dumb, but give it a chance..

[24 October 2003]

This may have not been the greatest show ever on television, but it wasn't the worst either. The funniest character was probably the cat, but everyone played a good part. So, although it was lame at times, it was OK if nothing else was on.

Passions (1999–2008)

Funny.

[2 September 2003]

That is the only word that can summarize this show. The absolutley outlandish storylines, the bad writing, and above all the worst acting ever on television combine to make this show hilarious, although I dont think that was the intention of the producers. I'm not saying that this is a particularly good soap opera, but I cant help but laugh whenever I do watch it.

Election (1999)

Good, but not much of of a comedy.

[17 July 2003]

Although this movie was very good and well written, I failed to see what was so funny about it, aside from a few scenes with Matthew Broderick. I also hate the way they repeatedly froze on people's faces, usually in stupid looking poses. I'm not sure if that was deliberate or just accidental. I dont think they should have been allowed to call this film a comedy, it is far more dramatic than funny. In conclusion, dont watch this film if you are in the mood for a lot of laughs, watch Austin Powers in Goldmember instead.

Rat Race (2001)

Excellent Film....

[26 June 2003]

I dont care if this was one of the stupidest films ever made, it was also the funniest. I especially enjoyed the comic antics of Rowan Atkinson. The funniest scene by far is the one on which Tracey flies over top of her boyfriend's house in a helicopter, and finds him in the pool with another woman. She becomes furious, and starts chasing him with the helicopter! It is very hard to believe though that someone would get so angry that they would resort to something so drastic. Definitely a film worth renting if you haven't already done so.

Duck Soup (1933)

Funny, but not because of Groucho Marx...

[10 June 2003]

Don't get me wrong, I'm sure that Groucho Marx was a very talented actor in his day. It's just that in this particular film, the dialogue he was given was a waste of his talent. It seemed he was just spouting out one bad comeback after another. The really funny gags and jokes came from Harpo's character, like when he keeps on trashing and sabatoging the vendor's stand, or lighting his hat on fire, or the door scene I think the reason that he was so funny was, unlike most actors he never spoke, everything was said through actions.

Hamlet (2000)

Speak English!!!

[5 June 2003]

I was recently forced to sit through this movie for 110 agonizing minutes in my English class. I had absolutely no idea what the h*** any of the characters were saying, why didnt they just do the movie in Latin for god's sake? From what I got out of it, there was a major corporation,(Denmark?) something about two young lovers and a CEO. Perhaps if they had made this film in its original setting, it might have worked, but they just can't make it work in modern day. I think it is because modern people don't speak like they do in the movie. I guess maybe I should have learned Shakespearean language beforehand to derive any enjoyment from it. I could tell that the actors were talented, it's a shame that they wasted it on something like this. **/10

Royal Canadian Air Farce (1993– )

One of Canada's greatest Tv accomplishments...

[5 June 2003]

This show is second only to Bob and Margaret for the best programs on Canadian TV. I think that the way they manage to stay fresh is because they base their jokes and gags on current events, unlike most other shows today. Therefore, they could probably go on for as long as there is news in this world without the jokes getting stale. Way to Go!

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999)

Compared to 1 and 3, this one sucks....

[4 June 2003]

There really isnt anymore to say about this movie. The plot was pretty bad, and the jokes werent all that funny. The series did manage to make a sensational comeback, however with Goldmember. I would have to say that this one was the worst, international man of mystery was in the middle and goldmember was the best, mostly because of the "Mole"

Full House (1987–1995)

They don't make 'em like this anymore....thank heaven.

[30 May 2003]

This has got to be one of the worst, poorly written and sappy comedies ever made. The character that ticked me off the most was Michelle, she was so disgustingly cute, and how the audience (or laugh track) would aawww at every little thing she did. The rest of the characters were equally as annoying, particularly Danny and definitely Kimmy. What I can't understand is how this show went on for so long, I can't imagine that it had a very large audience, besides perhaps small children who dont know enough to distinguish between good and bad acting, and good and bad jokes. In conclusion, go for a bike ride, wash your hair, stare at the walls, just dont give this show the time of day.

Chester's Rating: **/10 (this show was darn lucky to get the two stars that I did, as far as I'm concerned. This could possibly be attributed to the satisfactory acting abilities demonstrated by Candace Cameron)

Step by Step (1991–1998)

Why hasn't any of the cast made it big?

[18 May 2003]

This show was pretty good, considering that it was one of those family comedies. It was way better than Full House, or Saved By the Bell. It seems that like many other programs, the show's quality declined with the addition of the new baby. Strangely, she matured from an infant to a five or six year old girl within a couple of years. Sadly, most of the younger cast has not made a TV or movie appearance for five or six years.

Murder, She Wrote: The Celtic Riddle (2003 TV Movie)

Excellent.

[11 May 2003]

This TV movie was even better than the Murder She Wrote series itself. I would have thought that Angela Lansbury's acting abilities may have declined with her advanced age, but they seem to have gotten better. The plot as great, and all of the actors fit their roles perfectly.

Blue Crush (2002)

So what if the acting stank...

[10 April 2003]

You cant go wrong with a movie like this when you fill it up with hot chicks and the target it at a teenage audience. The plot was good,too, even though the story was a bit dull. All in all, if you are a teenage boy, this is the movie for you.

2 Stupid Dogs (1993–1995)

Very funny cartoon....

[1 April 2003]

I never could decide which of the charcters I liked better, I would have to say the dacshund, or what ever breed the small dog is. These two airheads argue over and ponder the dumbest things, like who will get possession of a broken toilet seat, and how to open an automatic door. They figure out that perhaps the boots on people's feet are what opens the door, so they run around stealing shoes and boots from people. I really cannot believe that Teletoon has stopped running this show for the sake of stupid programs like "Billy the Cat".

Whatever Happened to... Robot Jones? (2002–2004)

Terrible, disgusting, dreadful...Need I say more??

[13 March 2003]

This has got to be one of the dumbest shows ever on television. There is absolutely no plot to it. The animation is very poorly done, as well as the voices. I think they are trying to make a sort of animated version of Mork and Mindy(an alien sent from another planet to monitor human activities) but they couldnt make it work the first time and they could'nt make it work the second time either.

The Jerry Springer Show (1991–2018)

JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!

[4 March 2003]

Forget all the other comments that you have read on this page. This show was the best! Who even cares if it was staged and the guests on the show were trailer trash, it was still really funny, especially when the guests started physically attacking each other. I dont know why more people dont like this show, but some people must or it wouldnt have lasted as long as it did.

My Big Fat Greek Life (2003)

A hilarious continuation of the movie...

[28 February 2003]

First of all disregard all the other comments that you read on this page. There was nothing wrong with the pilot episode of the TV series. I cant believe that more people didnt like it. I cant wait for the second episode to be shown on Global on Monday.