androidarmy Reviews

Silent Night (2023)

Let's make a film without any dialogue...

[2/10 · 24 December 2023]

...or let's not and say we did. When I first noticed no dialogue, I thought maybe this is just going to be temporary. However, it soon became clear that this film was going to be completely void of any dialogue between the characters. I think one of the gangsters mumbled "f*** you" toward the end of the picture, but I wouldn't really say that that was dialogue. I was half expecting Marcel Marceau to pick up a phone at some point and utter the word "non." I started thinking that perhaps halfway during filming one of the actors lost their voice and the production company decided to just eliminate the dialogue to make it work. In other words, this dialogue-free production was such a bad idea, I believe it would have had to be a desperate one.

Based on the synopsis I read, I didn't expect much more than a shoot 'em up action movie with a lot of gritty inner-city hip-hop music and blaring gunfire. I probably would not have gone for a movie like this, but I was bored and I like Joel Kinnaman, but I usually prefer to hear him speak.

Another goof I noticed was that when Brian delivers the greeting card to the detective, the detective just picks it up and puts fingerprints all over it. Even if he already knew who it came from, this was still evidence. Even I know that you don't put your fingerprints all over evidence and I'm dumb as a box of rocks.

AIMEE: The Visitor (2023)

Artificial Stupidity

[1/10 · 4 October 2023]

OK, so I thought that perhaps this film would be reminiscent of some of those campy-technology based sci-fi films of the 80s & 90s, i.e., Johnny Mnemonic, Hackers, War Games, The Thirteenth Floor, to name a few. You know, those movies that were based on technology of the era that may have been decent movies at the time but are completely obsolete now and almost comical to watch.

This movie does not have to wait 30 years to be comical to watch. I could see this movie getting a B+ as a student film for a course at a Poughkeepsie, New York community college called "You can make movies too."

The only thing I liked about this movie was that the girl who played Gazelle was kind of cute. She had a rather Halston Sage kind a look. But unfortunately, her acting, although at times somewhat convincing, mostly missed the mark, as did the other actors' performances. I thought perhaps two of her 30 or so "What the f's?" were actually believable.

The scene where the two "FBI agents," (whose appearance in the film was completely irrelevant), were electrocuted, was reminiscent of Star Trek TOS 1966 special effects.

Ironically, the best actor in the cast was the artificial intelligence that played the character called AIMEE.

Here's the good news: if somebody forces you to watch this movie, it's only 69 minutes long!

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds: Those Old Scientists (2023) Season 2, Episode 7

My eyes began to ache from rolling so much...!

[4/10 · 31 July 2023]

It was a little bit "tongue in cheek." I thought it was great that Strange New Worlds had a funny episode when Spock turned human. That was a good "break," as it were. However, that was just two episodes ago. I also have to mention the fact that the Lower Decks characters were a little over the top. The episode really didn't have much of a plot, outside of the fact that these two characters from an animated future travel into the past and wreak havoc on Christopher Pike's enterprise. Perhaps if I was a fan of Lower Decks, I would have appreciated this episode more. However, to me it was just a waste of an episode. So far, this season, I have been disappointed at least 50% of the time. Nevertheless, that is better than being disappointed 100% of the time, which has been the case with other seasons of shows in this franchise.

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds: Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow (2023) Season 2, Episode 3

Christina Chong was amazing

[9/10 · 6 July 2023]

I'm not that impressed with Wesley's Captain Kirk, but I think it got better as the episode progressed. He just doesn't seem all that "Kirk-like." The scene where he gets in a rather childish fight with La'al over the device was almost comical. Not his fault-we can blame that on horrible direction. But a line that will probably go down as one of the worst ever uttered in the Star Trek universe was: "I've got to get back to my ship! My god, what have you done?" Sorry-not convincing at all!

So at first, I thought the episode was kind of tongue-in-cheek, but they did a good job of selling the rather subtle love story, and by the end, I was somewhat more engaged.

Nevertheless, I think that Christina Chong was an excellent casting choice for the show. I think she has some awesome acting chops and her scene at the end where she cried even had me tearing up. And I'm a grown-ass man.

Brooklyn 45 (2023)

The cast was too old.

[6/10 · 15 June 2023]

This wasn't a bad film. Good acting, but I just thought the cast was too old to have just been in the second world war. The characters all seem to be in their mid to late 50s, but most people serving in the military during the second world war were in their 20s to 30s, or at the very oldest in their 40s. I could see perhaps that these high ranking military personnel were older, but they have them in their 50s is a stretch. I think this film might've been a lot better with a younger cast in their late 20s or early 30s. For the folks who complained that the movie was all filmed in one room, it's probably because it was based on a stage play. I don't like movies that are based on stage plays for that reason, but this one kept my attention. I usually enjoy movies during this particular time period . And I believe they got the music and the zeitgeist of that time fairly correct, but once again, that cast was just too old. And I'm not an ageist. I'm in my 60s.

Rabbit Hole (2023)

Was so enjoying this, and then...

[5/10 · 24 April 2023]

...Peter Weller showed up! I'm sorry, but I don't consider Peter Weller an A-list actor. I'm sure many people disagree, but for me, it seems his ego penetrates every role he plays. And he always plays an extremely unlikable character. I don't think I've ever seen him in anything where he played a likable character, at least not in recent memory.

On a positive note, there's some good interaction between the Sutherland character and the girl "sidekick." And of course, you can't go wrong with Charles Dance. Also, the flashbacks make it hard to follow, even though the plot line is very interesting.

I'm on episode three, and ready to watch episode four, but if the Peter Weller character is any more prominent in the series, I will not be able to watch it.

M3GAN (2022)

More excruciating, it could not be!

[1/10 · 1 February 2023]

It really amazes me the kind of excrement Hollywood is perpetrating on us these days. This film is getting reviews with ratings as high as Casablanca for crying out loud! Is nothing sacred anymore? This is absolutely absurd. This movie is unrealistic and completely predictable. It is not scary. It is not funny. It is not good. The characters, especially the big-shot executive with the speech impediment, are so cliché! The fact that this popular review site with a vegetable in its name has given this film 98%, and all of the reviews go out of their way to drop the names of the producers and the film companies only confirms my belief that reviewers are being paid off! That is the only way that films like this, and the tragedy of films like The Menu can get such rave reviews. It seems like professional reviews these days are not based on legitimate criteria but on money and the politics of Hollywood.

The Menu (2022)

What a disappointment!

[3/10 · 17 January 2023]

Why are we drooling over the fecal matter that Hollywood is producing these days? This movie was horrible! Love the cast. Love Ralph Fines. Love Anya Taylor Joy. But the premise was absurd. Claimed to be a comedy horror movie, but it was neither. In order to be truly scary, the viewer has to believe that something like this could actually happen in real life. The idea that this "chef" could summon these sycophants to do his bidding is completely absurd. It's like Hollywood is saying hey this will happen because we are Hollywood and we say it can happen and it's just pure BS. Also, I didn't find any of the characters that interesting. And I found no satisfaction whatsoever in the ending of this film. I was so looking forward to it, but I was absolutely disappointed. Horrible film!

The Rookie: Feds (2022–2023)

Britt can't even save this show!

[1/10 · 20 October 2022]

Not even Britt Robertson can't save this show from the train wreck that is Niecy Nash. She has to be friends with one of the producers or something. Her acting is awful. The character she is playing is a rising star FBI agent based on her stellar work as a guidance counselor at a high school. Not that the show is all that good anyway. My take on spinoff shows is that they are generally less than 30% as good as the original. This is just the networks way of cashing in on the popularity of the original show. With very few exceptions I find that spinoff shows are never as good as the original. I would definitely pass on the show.

The Gray Man (2022)

Great movie for people with low IQs!

[2/10 · 30 July 2022]

Seriously, this movie is just some more of the same dribble that comes out of Hollywood. Movies like this are made based on research that the studios do on demographics, and statistics trying to second guess what the public will like and not like. Unfortunately the average person in the general public is lucky to have 2 IQ points to rub together. So the movies Hollywood comes up with these days are more of the same inane, unintelligent garbage, stuffed down our throat's with big-budget marketing campaigns. It's all about the bottom line. No creativity anymore. No real passion!

How about making a movie where people actually don't just shoot each other. It's either movies about killers or about $#@% superheroes! I've really had it with Hollywood! No wonder Netflix is going bankrupt!

Fresh (2022)

The premise was so ridiculous they had to build it as a comedy thriller.

[2/10 · 9 March 2022]

The premise was so ridiculous they had to build it as a"comedy thriller." At exactly 32 minutes, this movie took a complete and utter U-turn. Wasn't funny. Wasn't thrilling. Just. Wasn't. Good.

CNN Special Reports: The Trump Insurrection: 24 Hours That Shook America (2021) Season 42, Episode 1

Totally FACTUAL!

[10/10 · 28 October 2021]

Lots of bias in the negative reviews. No shocker there! This is just a factual account of how an insecure narcissist with elephantiasis of the ego tried to destroy capitalism via a giant temper-tantrum! There is no doubt that the spray-tanned tyrant orchestrated the whole thing. The facts in the film will be corroborated by history!

NCIS: Hawai'i (2021–2024)

This show is so LAME!

[2/10 · 28 September 2021]

I tried to watch the first two episodes, but could not engage. Did not like ANY of the characters, with the exception perhaps of the tech guy played by Jason Antoon, but even his character spouted out unrealistic dialogue. With the exception of New Orleans, I never watched NCIS franchise shows. I was rather looking forward to this show as NoLA was cancelled, but I have to say I was quite disappointed. BLAH!

The Tomorrow War (2021)

Great movie for 12-year-old boys

[3/10 · 11 July 2021]

When you get to the part about the tuna Santa, stop watching-you've seen the best part. The next 2 hours and 14 minutes is absurd, unless of course you are a 12-year-old boy. Just sayin'!

Settlers (2021)

Talented Cast - Great Acting!

[8/10 · 11 July 2021]

I don't understand the bad reviews. This was a powerful, albeit, somber film. Jonny Lee Miller's performance, however brief, was spot on. Sofia Boutella was absolutely stunning! Ismael Cordova was easy and hard to hate at the same time. The actors who played Remmy (9 & 18), Brooklyn Prince & Nell Tiger Free will be household names in the coming years. Not to mention, that they were perfectly cast. I could see Brooklyn's character in Nell's performance, both in appearance and mannerisms.

This was a film about people in a nearly impossible to imagine situation. Yes it was somber! It was SUPPOSED to be. And it's not like the robot character did not add a tiny wee pinch of comic relief.

Perhaps the bad reviews were from people expecting "Gravity," "Passengers," or some other easy to swallow sci-fi. I clicked the links of the bad reviews to see what they DID like and MANY of them ONLY REVIEWED THIS FILM, which to me is odd. Is someone trying to drive down ratings for some reason? Cancel culture! Or maybe they just need the sophistication of films like "John Wick," or "The Hitman's Bodyguard." Or perhaps they don't think this film measures up to the cinematic benchmark of the Marvel Universe. Who knows?

I totally enjoyed this movie-all 103 minutes of it!

Flinch (2021)

Pleasantly surprised...

[8/10 · 19 February 2021]

Pleasantly surprised... not a bad movie at all. A few clichés, but very watchable. Had a real 80s feel to it, i.e., the music, the photography, etc.

Light from Light (2019)

Boring

[2/10 · 7 February 2021]

When the most exciting part of the film in when a supporting character gets stung by a wasp, you know you've got a loser. Bottom line: this film was excruciatingly boring! It could've been done in 30 minutes. Many dragged out scenes with moody music that were completely unnecessary.

Pieces of a Woman (2020)

Brilliant!

[10/10 · 14 January 2021]

Firstly, an outstanding performance by Academy award winning actress Ellen Burstyn. That being said, the other actors, the music, the cinematography, was brilliant. This film had some subtle themes throughout: the apple, the use of the bridge construction as a time element, the family interconnectivity. Not the sort of film that I would usually like, but the cast intrigued me and I gave it a watch. I believe there should be some academy award considerations here.

Walkaway Joe (2020)

Good pool movie.

[7/10 · 10 May 2020]

Somebody mentioned that they didn't understand why all the good reviews and that they gave up halfway through. Well chances are the good reviews came from people who stuck it out till the end. Good pool movie. I always like it when you can tell the actors are really shooting pool and they don't cut away from the actor to the shot, making you think that somebody other than the actor actually made the shot. You can tell that the actors are either decent pool players or they took the time to practice for the film.

Star Trek: Picard (2020–2023)

I'm laughing at all the haters!

[8/10 · 9 February 2020]

When Star Trek TNG came out in 1987, diehard TOS fans were appalled by the fact that there was a Klingon officer, a touchy-feely ships' counselor, children on the enterprise, etc. I suppose that the haters think the producers of TV shows should turn out the same old stuff. What they don't understand is that these people want to create something new. Not rehash something old. Open your minds and get out of the past and you will enjoy this show too.