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Reviews
Beyond Valkyrie: Dawn of the 4th Reich (2016)
Omfg!
Omg!
*spoiler alert (almost)* I watched a little bit more than 20 min of this movie. That was not a completely waste of my time, because i gave it 2 stars. (i like 2ww theme) The message is totally clear in this film. Germans are/was idiots. I don't care to explain because i don't want spend more time talking about this stupid movie. I just want to warn everyone else and no more. This is a spoiler. The heroes flies a ("historical"?) glider .... witch has a motor ... and ... explodes.
See: if you like 2 world war action movies when people shoot Germans and you don't care much about history. Don't see: if you respect anything.
Beyond the Mask (2015)
I am amazed
One of the worst story telling i've ever stumbled upon.
When i saw this movie i had to go through an our of reviving my IMDb account, just to say this. *I'm actual laughing* I will cast no shadow over the actors, the picture nor the music. It's good quality throughout most perspective. But the story telling of this movie *now i'm laughing again* is probably ... one of the worst.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Looking at the first 20 minutes tells you that nothing makes sense. (Yes, this spoilers only treats the first 20 minutes or so for the movie, so you can read this and still see the movie without fear of anything important being revealed. If you still want to see it.) There is no thought of what is possible in reality, and that would be okay if it's that kind of movie. But it isn't. In the opening scene the lead character will shoot a flint lock silent sniper rifle with darts that make people fall a sleep instantly. He has a companion that has a wooden thingie the reads distance and wind speed. They fire a crossbow with 600 feet (200m) rope attached (i guess 300 pound (140kg) of weight). They are gliding down on the rope into a ship that is moving. He steels the secret document and jumps in the water with the secret parchment documents which would destroy them. He then meets up with his boss and tell him he wants to change his life and the boss immediately places a car-bomb that is attached in an magnetically fashion under his carriage. (Yes, a 1700's car bomb) They tell the driver and the guy that accompany the hero that the bomb has a 10 second fuse. When the fuse is lit (magically?) the guy in the carriage tries to shoot the hero super killer person. (the guys know there's a bomb so i guess they was willing to die (not to try jumping off)... or just did not like thinking a lot) A person from nowhere rides up to the carriage and warns the hero of the bomb and dies in the action. (where did he come from and why?) The hero is saved by the bell and assumes the identity of the dead man that warned him of the bomb. Now it shows that this man was a priest and the hero takes his identity. (witch seems to be really easy, if the person has no friends or someone who will miss him) The hero swear that he will avenge him and now you think his going to kill people .... but no. That was just for the effect. He now just wants to be a priest and a good person. And so on, and so on. No reality rolls from the film crew and no one asked why and how anything is happening. Thing are done just for the effect with no questions asked.
I could go on forever about this movie. About all meaningless odd thing that plays out and all the unjustified small thing that swarms the movie, but i think you have already guessed the movie. Its just about making money on a theme.
Me my self love good movies and .... the really really bad crappy ones. (i now, uncommon combo) So i will continue watch this, just to tell friends and have a lot of really good laughs. I will never understand how this movie can have any rating over 1.2 on IMDb. Thats a real mystery that i will never solve. And if i was an serious actor in this movie, i would never tell anyone that i was a part of it. Nor would i do it if i had anything to do with this film.
As i said in the beginning. I will not cast any shadow over the actors, the crew, or anyone else ... except the director and the other people that had anything to do with the storytelling.
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You will like this movie if you are a boy and don't have any standards.
It's a must see for you who love a really good/wretched B-movies. (Especially if you and you're friends have a big hangover and it's Sunday.) Don't see it if you want to see a mediocre or good movie.
If you like lousy story telling movies and you want to have a lot of seriously good laughs with you're friend it's at must see as well.
Don't see if you want to see more than moving frames.
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Thanks Google for the help with the translation. :)
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009)
Fantastic effects in a really crappy movie.
I am stunned.
The writers to this movie must have been really cheep. :)
The effects are amazing ... but ... *laughing* ... i don't know what to say about the rest of it ... it should be something embarrassing about actors and the seven year old school class that must have been behind the story. *starts to laugh again*
See if ... ... you have a great passion for effects. ... if you like to have good laughters to really crappy stories.
Don see ... ... if you respect life.
But really, if you like b-movies, ridiculous stories or want to use a bad example in some lesser challenging education (for some reason) ... then this movie is the best.
*cant stop laughing* :D
Stargate: Atlantis: Vegas (2008)
Not really Atlantis, but .... ???
This is Not an ordinary/normal Stargate Atlantis episode. The actor plays new, different characters, in a Vegas/detective story, in something that feels like a bad copy attempt of a CSI episode, with influence from SgA, lock stock, rfa dream, etc.
The show is canceled and this episode sends the clear message that they want to show that they can do other roles/films/things, like a CV so that they will have the possibility of getting new work. It's a mess of cool filmtechnics (that sometimes works), a lot of hard music and ambition to show off, that isn't consequent nor thought through. They could have done this ep in the middle of the season, but when it's the second last episode, it sucks.
SUMMARY:
If you've followed the series, this episode is most likely to be a very big disappointment.
If you are a young teenager or never seen the show before, and like sci-fi ... you will probably love it.
PS! this ep is still need to see since it explains some events in the last episode. DS!