Change Your Image
orlandocoaster
Reviews
Meg 2: The Trench (2023)
As written by a 5th grade boy
Insipid, stupid, and just plain wrong. Everything about this film feels like it was written and directed by a 5th grade boy. No basis in reality. No rhyme or reason. And the dialogue (if you want to call it that) is ridiculous.
Now, if Jason would have taken off his shirt or at least appeared half interested in the film, it might have been ok. But he is clearly phoning it in scene after scene.
After awhile, you start rooting for the animals. And what exactly is this movie about? Saving the environment? Mining for treasures? Showing what sharks sort of but not really look like??
Do yourself and your brain a HUGE favor and avoid this like the plague.
Glamorous (2023)
I so wanted this to be good
But....
the characters were so one sided and annoying.
Marco and his indecisiveness was exhausting.
SO many plot holes.
And the gay son never once did anything other than try and sabotage other people. He was given zero redeeming values.
Each episode also ran WAY too long.
They should have been tight 20+ minute episodes that zipped aloing.
And what was it with the annoying JJ Abrams lens flare throughout?
Really wanted it to be better esp since it represented so many LGBTQ+ storylines.
Stick to the far superior Heartstopper. That show has real characters, real development, and it doesn't insult your intelligence.
Georgia Rule (2007)
Where to begin
Wow. What a waste of talent and my time.
I had read about this film and finally got around to viewing it. It was awful.
The fact that some of the characters drove from San Francisco to Idaho was ridiculous since the drive takes at least 12 hours. And they made it seem like it was only a few hours away.
The script was trite and pathetic. After they FINALLY discover that Rachel was telling the truth, they just end it? So sexual abuse of a minor is OK? And that film just wraps up with a happy ending???
I hated this film. Gary Marshall said he waited 10 years to make this film because no studio wanted to. Wonder why.
I Could Never Be Your Woman (2007)
What were they thinking
I found this "movie" when searching online. It looked to have a stellar cast and well known writer and director. So why is it SO awful?
Paul Rudd is adorable, but his bumbling cute guy routine gets really old real fast.
Michell Pfeiffer looks like she is faxing in her performance. She is just terrible in almost every scene.
Are we supposed to believe that these "actors" are portraying high school kids in the fictitious You Go Girl TV show? O is it some inside joke?
The only redeeming factor is the soundtrack. But save yourself the time to watch this trainwreck. From its awfully wordy and totally forgettable title to the many, MANY lapses in reality, this is a true trainwreck.
Is It Just Me? (2010)
Cliche to the 9th degree
Why does every gay comedy follow the same VERY tired formula:
1) Take one sort of cut but nerdy guy looking for love
2) Give him a hot roommate or friend or somebody who will spend 90% of the movie without a shirt on
3) Have the love interest show up early
4) Add a sassy female friend who seems to have it all together and dispenses advice 24/7
5) Put ZERO suspense into the film. You KNOW our hero will end up with his new love
6) Add an older gay character to give the film some sort of weight
7) Voila! You have another formulaic waste of time.
Christmas in Tahoe (2021)
Awful from the 1st Off Pitch Note to the End
This flick has EVERYTHING:
Anti vaxxer and former "never to work again on Broadway" actress Laura Osnes mugging and "shmacting" to within an inch of her life.
Lead singer of the band Train playing a hotel worker? Of course, he eventually sings at the end with his band who are also somehow in this film.
But the piece de resistance is the acapella 3 person group. Laura or should I say Claire wants to book them for her Christmas show since their "rendition of Silent Night is legendary." (Her words)
Well, they sing it and it IS legendarily AWFUL! Not only is it a bad arrangement, but THEY CANNOT SING! At least one or more of them cannot find and hold pitch.
So strap in for a truly frightening look at what happens when a film neglects to hire competent people to do their music.
Over the Moon (2020)
Beautiful and heartfelt
While lots of animated movies deal with death and loss (Up, Bambi, etc), this one took a really mature approach to the grieving process. Maybe it was due to being locked up during quarantine, but the last 20 minutes had me in tears. I could so relate to the characters and their reluctance to move on from the pain of loss. Yet after getting through those emotions, I was left with a great sense of appreciation for loss. Young viewers may miss the heaviness of it, but the beautiful animation and intriguing story should touch anyone with a heart.
A Week Away (2021)
Manipulative
I thought this was a musical. Turns out it was a Christian movie disguised as a musical. If that's the case, they need to state that RIGHT OUT FRONT. Don't advertise it as a musical when it was a hardcore Christian movie. Everything was incredibly manipulative and the relationships were implausible. Thrown into the mix a lead guy who is a poor man's Zac Efron and you end up with High School Musical goes to Vacation Bible School.