simonsmeaton Reviews

Dark Angel (2000–2002)

Hideously Bad - Jessica Alba kills the show dead

[2/10 · 11 February 2007]

I didn't have much hope for this show. After all, one of the writer-producers declared proudly that he didn't like Science-Fiction and that it therefore was going to help him make a great Science-Ficiton show.

Sorry, but that sort of speech is usually followed by a dud, because it is very difficult to excel at something you don't even like.

Dark Angel met all those expectations and more.

But what really killed this show was Jessica Alba. You can imagine the producers going "wow, what a babe!! With her in it, our show will be a major hit!" And it's exactly that kind of condescension for the audience that killed this show.

Jessica alba can't act. Her grimaces make her utterly unattractive and she can't speak lines correctly. She's not even athletic enough to be convincing in action scenes.

Without Jessica alba, this show may have had a chance to get better. But with her, Dark Angel was DOA artistically. James Cameron's name sustained it for two more seasons than it deserved.

It won't be missed.

Friday Night Lights (2006–2011)

The Worst TV Has to Offer

[1/10 · 10 February 2007]

Where to begin, where to begin? Oh wait!!! I know where to begin, because it begins and ends in the same place: Friday Night Lights looks like it was produced by a couple of 8 year old afflicted with Attention Deficit Disorder.

In other words: it's bloody unwatchable! I have no idea where the people behind the scenes got the idea that unprofessional camera work was going to enhance their series, but it's backfired on them.

The only people saying positive things about the show are the critics, which in itself says a lot about what critics look for in a TV show: they certainly don't look for quality, because there is none to be seen on Friday Night Lights.