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BoringBoo
Reviews
Find It Fix It Flog It (2016)
They Don't Flog It
OK, this show has recently moved to Yesterday so its come up on my radar. I have no idea what's going on. They go round posh people's yards and pick out some choice objects to renovate and sell on for them.....at least thats what it looks like on the surface, however what you get is only a bit of that.
The two pick out some stuff and renovate it with the help of a small guy with long hair and a lady with a masters in textiles. They then invite a guy from the Antiques Road Show round to value the items, he says a price and that is the amount that the seller gets, but is it because we never see an actual sale are they even sold? Does the guy from Antiques Roadshow sell them for them or is there a big warehouse somewhere full of stuff?
There is also the narrator, who has a kind of condescending tone to their voice. They don't appear to have any interest and are just reading lines.
Then there are the amount of plugs that Yesterday does for this programme it's ridiculous. It's a show where it could be good but isn't so I don't know how it has such a high score. If they rescue an old bench I want to see that bench's full journey, from the moment they find it, renovate it and then sell it and then I want to see how the new owners are getting on, but no all we see is them getting it, renovating it and lastly getting it valued, that is it. We do however see the sellers commenting on the money they have made.
Don't watch it, it's not worth a new series there are far better shows which will never see a return.
The Cockfields (2019)
There Needs To Be A Zero Star
What is going off on Gold? To have such utter rubbish like this and the equally garbage Sandylands and they both have second series. To put this unfunny tripe alongside greats like Open All Hours just further highlights what absolute crud this show truly is.
Nothing is funny about it at all and most of the reviews saying it's great are very suspect. This should be a 4 star rated show at best and that's pushing it. It should never have been commissioned.
Thankfully it appears Diane Morgan has left this pile of dung I would like to believe it's because she doesn't want to be associated with such tripe.
There are no belly laughs or side splitting moments it's not gentle comedy it's not comedy at all. Please do not give it another series and stop re-running it as it's painful to my eyes, ears and health.
Paranormal Activity (2007)
Don't Believe The Hype
I found this film quite boring from the off, I lost interest in the two main characters virtually straight away, as both were annoying.
Lots of people I know have watched this film and wet themselves with fright, so scared that they had to sleep with the light on, to be honest I couldn't wait until the film was over, not because it was scary, but because it was so rubbish.
OK, everyone knows the story, a couple and the demon, etc, the video camera set up to record, the flour footprints, the dragging off the bed, the murder, too many questions unanswered, a movie for the simple folk of this world.
Why not move out of that bedroom? Why not get that girl sectioned, she's obviously nuts? Why sleep with the door open? Why didn't the boyfriend sleep on that side of the bed?
I could go on, but I won't bother, this film (in my opinion) is total crud and should never have been hyped up, because it is not worthy of all the glowing reviews from media types, who jump on bandwagons and kiss film's backsides, because they have no minds of their own.
Vulgar (2000)
This Was A Terrible Film
Sorry, but I don't agree with the people here. The acting was diabolical, it was like porn movie acting, it was terrible.
I fell asleep through it, it wasn't gripping, it wasn't impressive, it was a badly acted, thrown together film. and even though I had fallen asleep, it was like I had watched the whole thing, very apt there is torture in this film as it was torture for me to watch it.
This was referred to me by a friend, who incidentally had never seen it, but read reviews, possibly on here, where the gushing kissing of asses is so evident.
The lead actor is terrible, he cannot act, in fact none of them can act, Suplee does what he does best, plays weirdos and Mewes is doing the same role as usual, it's the sort of film that had been written in a day and then filmed over two days, it is that bad.
If you are an artsy fartsy type, then you may like this film, or you may just say you like the film to make yourself appear cultured, but you are only fooling yourself. Don't believe the hype.
A film about a violent sexual assault and I fell asleep, well it says it all doesn't it?
Suffering Man's Charity (2007)
Total Rubbish
I did not enjoy this film, it seemed like it was sewn together and totally taken over by Cumming. This actor I feel is completely over-rated in my opinion so to see him acting in a film he had also directed was a bit much as it was all "Me, me, me!" I know the whole plot centres around his character, but there was no depth to it and it fell flat.
A gay music teacher (Cummings) who picks up hustlers on a regular basis and gives them free bed and board and the use of his whole home and fixtures, finds out this young attractive man, whom he likens to "Warren Beatty in Splendour in the Grass," (David Boreanaz)has been hustling him and goes completely over the top. The acting is really terrible from Cummings and his accent sounded like it was based on watching Dustin Hoffman films.
The plot was very sketchy and I watched it thinking it was going to end, but it didn't, it seemed to rattle on forever, even though it is a relatively short film. I would not call this comedy, nor would I call it horror, more like "Sufference" as in that's what most people are enduring while watching this piece of tripe.
To me, Boreanaz in women's underwear and tied to a chair was someone's fantasy, director maybe? It had no point whatsoever. I know there are a lot of David Boreanaz fans out there, but please avoid this film like the plague, it is best forgotten, even if you do get to see his bottom a couple of times.