Fizzlefried Reviews

Derek DelGaudio's In & Of Itself (2020)

It's a kind of magic.

[9/10 · 9 February 2021]

Let me tell you a story, are you sitting comfortably, then I'll begin. Stop reading and just watch, why do you need other people's affirmations? The consensus says... Who cares?

It is truly marmite. Some will love it's affirmations of self, that we all long to be seen and take joy in the message. Others will see through it's emotional trickery and slight of hand Tom foolery and walk away with nothing. For those people I feel truly sorry.

Losses one star because the medium would be more powerful in person and now I've seen this I can never experience it for the first time in real life. For which I feel sadness. Excellent performance.

The Watch (2020–2021)

It is trying so hard.

[3/10 · 16 January 2021]

Seems to miss the point of Pratchett's writings. Takes ideas and throws them at the wall, hoping it will stick. They need to drink enough water, this is a constipated pain, forced out to fit in to an agenda. Why, just why?

Edited: Watched 6 episodes now, it ain't getting better but it ain't getting worse. In covid lockdown it is something new, not good but new.

Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

How did this happen?

[3/10 · 16 January 2021]

It is just boring, trite and cliche. First film was good apart from cgi boss level ending, this is just vomit gravy. Rehashed enemy arch (from amazing Spiderman 2, which worked out well for that movie) it is just overlong and a mess of banality. A waste of time. 3 stars for Gal, good Wonder Woman in a bad movie.

Synchronic (2019)

Divisive but good

[6/10 · 15 January 2021]

Problem is we all have to take a side, a stance. Nothing is grey everything is black or white. This film takes that literally. The thematics of this film are a perfect example of how messed up modern society of 2021 is. To drive home a strong narrative, with interesting ideas and solid relationship building we must inject race. Why? Isn't friendship enough? Isn't regret of life choices and loss of love enough? A human condition can be boiled down to the simple, that we all struggle, that we all yearn. Everything about this narrative is excellent, interesting and new apart from the Anthony Mackie perspective. It's hard being a black man. Now and definitely in the past. Yeah really thanks, history is bad mo okay. Just feels like lazy writing from a couple of white guys. Inject race, it's cool, relevant and of the moment. In ten years I hope we look back on current media and say this is infantile because today the messages of diversity as a point not as a standard seem forced and a shortcut to a meaning. I want better, representation is correct but not for the sake of intelligence. Treat your audience with respect if you want acceptance of a message.

War of the Worlds (2005)

waste of time.....

[1/10 · 1 July 2005]

just plain awful......Dakota screaming,and screaming and screaming. won't that girl shut up. teenager brooding.... tom looking scared.. the flu... dead aliens the end. waste of money and just downright disappointing. should i comment on the comparison to the original... no it should never be muttered in the same breath, the people involved should know better. the aliens look good, but just not that great, the effects are in no way special. the berg was still polishing the effects appartenly only two weeks ago and he should have taken a bit longer. the machines are clouded in mist and dust just because he doesn't seem to know what to do with then. the biggest thing is that the movie is plain boring... it called war of the worlds but plays more like Signs... but a duller version of Signs.it takes a lot to offend me in cinema but ever year, summertime comes along and they don't leave me alone. This years Day After Tomorrow. Sucks. Now who do i see to get my money back.

Hulk (2003)

If someone took a dump in my mouth this is, i assume what it would taste like.

[2/10 · 30 July 2003]

Nuff said....

This film stinks. The dog fight is okay, nice and brutal but way too dark, as a whole this a 100 million dollar waste of effort.

poor Jennifer, you are so much better. Mr Bana shame on you... Pure tripe.

Ken Park (2002)

I killed my grandmother because she was a passive aggressive bitch!

[7/10 · 30 July 2003]

What a line, and what a movie.

"I killed my grandfather because he is a cheater, who tells war stories." Yeah they deserved it. The B***ards.

Larry Clark for myself and my peers has been the only film maker who made films about us. Well that was eight years ago with kids when i was that age. Now in my mid twenties, this film gave me that jealously feeling of the young. (a motif portrayed in the film by the mother doing her daughters boyfriend) We are all try to hold on to our youth, be it with fancy diets, gym membership, hair dye or myself still riding bmx whilst being nearer to thirty than i'd like to be.

To say this film lack motivation and momentum would be an understatement, but it was perfectly paced. We drop in to these kids lifes in times of change, in the upheaval. It is shocking, but it also so unemotive within the context that it left me ambivalent to their function. Do we really need a money shot in a masturbation scene? maybe. In fact I almost see a methodology at work. But what follows is an unnecessary second shot of the said substance dangling of his thang to the floor. Same can be said for the guy taking a leak. Mr Clark sound effects would had sufficed rather than a close up tilting from chest to said action.

In fairness i am all for pushing boundaries in cinema, i was the first to get outraged when the bbfc in this country removed three and half minutes from Miike's Ichii the killer because it my damage our sheltered brains. Yet Irreversible remains untouched, clearly showing that the censors don't touch reality, because reality represented in cinema is Art. so i am sure when this finally gets a release in this country it maybe passed uncut. (but i doubt it) What is wrong with this film is that it doesn't let you imagine, fill in the blanks. Sometimes the reality is purer and more believable when a step is taken back and it is left alone. The controversial scenes to me seemed staged, free of the inhibitions found in the my favourite scenes from Kids, (little kids smoking dope, chatting S**t, every scene with Casper, the deflowering) sometimes less is more.

Ken Park is interesting in the respect it has for it characters, they are all fully developed and living and breathing up on the screen. It was good to see Amanda Plummer missing in action in anything decent since The Prophecy, Freeway and The Fisher King. All the young cast also gave career making performances especially Stephen Lasso as the bruised and beaten skater Claude.

This is a good film but in no ways great. I've seen everything Larry Clark and Harmony Korine have stamped their unique ideology upon and if we were going to rate them, this would be my second least favourite. (teenage caveman being the worst, it's just horrid, although some of the same actors appear in Ken Park, it is shockingly bad) Gummo, Kids, Another day in paradise, Julien, donkey boy and Bully just seem to have more structure, more of a point. i don't hate this film, i just don't love it like all the others. this is a film about a couple of moments, not the conclusive whole.

Remember kids if life is getting you down, you always have each other, have a three way, take a camera and turn it into a movie. But most importantly remember your back story, you must all be fleshed out, you must all have lifes outside of this act of intimacy or else all you are making is porn. Now i'll leave you with the last lines of the film for us all to ponder........

"aren't you glad your mum didn't abort you?"

The Princess and the Warrior (2000)

Oh my God!

[10/10 · 30 July 2003]

There is so much i love about this film i don't want to taint it with my own binal comments.

If you only ever see one film for the rest of your life, make it this one. Also buy the soundtrack. Just Pure cinematic beauty.

Hard Boiled (1992)

a simple question?

[23 April 2003]

why doesn't John Woo make good films anymore? after the pathetic tripe that was Windtalkers i have given up on the man...... money is the route to all evil and in John Woo's case it has been the route to his talent. Hollywood is corrupt. Case for the prosecution, his American movie career. exhibit A, best English language film hard target, and this is P#*s poor. i rest my case. Defence if you will.

Below (2002)

dive, dive, dive.

[8 April 2003]

just finished watching this in the wee hours of the morning. i'm alone and i'm p*** scared. Amibiguity is under rated in modern cinema. Now we have the technology, filmmakers can create anything that can be envisioned. Dinosaurs can yet again roam the earth, and we can settle in front of a submarine flick that doesn't resemble an airfix model in a bath tub and be engrossed. So with a believable setting does Twohy with class A special effects create the perfect ghost? almost, may be it exists but we can never be sure. The film is never really that believable as a ghost story, because at times it doesn't want to be. it is to wrapped up in its own WWII fable of brave soldiers doing the good fight. But when it is, it delivers. What is often forgotten is that a fleeting glance is far more scary than a full on splatter house ghoul. Below was constantly interesting without being overly riverting, i like it a lot better than it really deserved. (spoilers) Some missed opportunity's such as the incineration of the crew could have been handled a bit better. Playing the scene for suspense rather than showing the graphic reality for me was a mistake. the ghost was well conceived, but under used. the film could have done with a few more scares in the final reel. Overall this film was a "not bad", rather than a "yeah it's great". 7/10

Infernal Affairs (2002)

Hong Kong cinema's finest, another hollywood casaulty.

[19 March 2003]

With the recent popularity of the martial arts movie, Infernal affairs is a refreshing slice of police drama that deserves more attention. Gangster films of old, the better tommorrow's or the young and dangerous series seem to be distant memory and the eastern cinema that prolifrates our market in the west is the kung fu flick layden with bile enducing special effects or the recent spate of eerie horror's waiting in the wings for their predestined hollywood remake. (which will ultimately tarnish their otherwise impecable repetations) but now Hollywood is turning it's sights on to the respected output of the east, it's crime thrillers. Infernal affairs is not an untouchable work of genius, it has holes like any narrative. but it is a superb example of what the East can produce with a modecome of self restraint. No special effects, no slow-mo gunplay, in fact most of the violence is played out of scene, but still within earshot. these people live in the information era, they have lifes and lies, deception is the game. this is just solid drama played out by solid performances. Anthony Wong is understated and cool,(at times you still want to see him explode as in Beast cops or bunman,) Tony Leung is his usual mean and moody self and but it is Andy lau's performance that really shines. A powerhouse performance underneath such a cool exterior, you'll be lucky to see him flinch, yet he protrays such intensity, constantly he plays his cards close to his chest, caught up and confused losing himself in the facade he has created. Truly excellent. so we hear of a remake in the offering, brad pitt's name attached. may be okay, then again. well if they destroy this like they did to john Woo, tsui hark, Chow yun Fat, that horrorible ring remake, jackie chan, jet li and countless others there may be an undercover agent infiltrating hollywood, out to whack a few head honcho's.

Avalon (2001)

"Welcome to the Real world"

[9/10 · 21 June 2002]

This sepia dreamlike state of Avalon is the nearest we are going to get to Anime, on the cinema screen. Oh it's like the Matrix, only clever! Existenz used the plot device of the virtual Game world first, true but symbolism and ambiguity don't make a great film. Except maybe in this case, bias to the world of anime, Yes. Hate Hollywood, not really, i just dislike the majority of the cliche tripe that it produces. But here Oshii has created a film that is for once accessable to a western audience, it is simple and conventional and you don't need a degree in microtechnology to understand the techno-garble. The boundaries of reality and the game blur to a conclusion that is no Spacey is Keyser Soze, but is wholly satisfying in it's familiarity. Avalon is visually stunning, and bleak in its Orwellian vision of technology and it's power of control. but what is more important is that it is visually interesting and original. (Attack of the clones, someone watched Blade Runner, Fifth Element and Gladiator the day before his script was due) Ash, our hero has no real life outside of the game. She exists to be the best at Avalon, a computer generated war simulation, that has made her wealthy in comprasion to the oppressed masses. Poland is a great setting and displays the poverty and desperation of the scenerio. This a bleak reality devoid of colour. the film is full of mythology, technology, Osmii has created a weird hybrid that still feels like a nature exstention of his animated classics Patlabor and Ghost in the Shell. Iconography is characteristic of Osmii, the slow motion bullet fire, techno-garble, femme fatale heroine and long musical montages set to orchestral pieces.

Oshii is a film maker who knows how to construct a scene, on the screen through visuals, he is not an MTV quick editing junkie. Avalon is slow, but that is it's beauty. It has a sense of history, it knows what medium it is working in, it is a film unlike Hollywood's recent pop video approach to film making. The Brown's of Avalon are our future, bleak but at least they have soul.