Change Your Image
oz-marky
Reviews
Skinamarinki-doo Part II (2023)
Better than the original
Skip the original movie and just watch this. Far more entertaining, and much shorter. It has all the same elements, but doesn't leave you feeling like you just wasted part of your life. Hope to see more from this creative team, as they obviously understand humor, parody, and the benefits of condensing a ridiculous, and poorly made film, into a short time frame. I just wish those who made the original had been as insightful, and left me smiling, instead of angry for putting myself through one of the worst attempts at independent filmmaking of the past decade. Thanks for this, it almost made that lost time, worthwhile.
Forest of Death (2023)
Almost Unwatchable
Seems everyone involved has written a review giving this poorly made film a high score. The storyline is weak, the dialogue is childish, and the acting is abysmal. Nothing happens for most of the movie, and when it does it's not scary of surprising. Annoying teens in a house (not a cabin) do the exact opposite of what they're told not to do. The "special" effects aren't special, and the ending is laughable. Not clever or different, just low budget and poorly constructed. A waste of the cost of renting this boring, predictable, drawn out mess. Felt like a bunch of friends decided to make a movie, but shouldn't have.
The Midwich Cuckoos (2022)
Not worth the effort!
The Midwich Cuckoos is a 1957 science fiction novel written by the English author John Wyndham. It tells the tale of an English village in which the women become pregnant by brood parasitic aliens.
The book has been praised by many critics, including the dramatist Dan Rebellato, who called it a searching novel of moral ambiguities, and the novelist Margaret Atwood, who called the book Wyndham's masterpiece. His previous best seller was The Day Of The Triffids.
Ambulances arrive at two traffic accidents blocking the only roads into the (fictional) British village of Midwich, Winshire. Attempting to approach the village, one ambulanceman becomes unconscious. Suspecting gas poisoning, the army is notified. They discover that a caged canary becomes unconscious upon entering the affected region, but regains consciousness when removed. Further experiments reveal the region to be a hemisphere with a diameter of 2 miles (3.2 km) around the village. Aerial photography shows an unidentifiable silvery object on the ground in the centre of the affected zone.
After one day, the effect vanishes, along with the unidentified object, and the villagers wake with no apparent ill effects. Some months later they realise that every woman of child-bearing age is pregnant-even those who are single or not otherwise in relationships with men-with all indications that the pregnancies were caused by xenogenesis during the period of unconsciousness that has come to be referred to as the "Dayout".
When the 31 boys and 30 girls are born, they appear normal, except for their unusual golden eyes, light blonde hair, and pale, silvery skin. These children have none of the genetic characteristics of their mothers. As they grow up, it becomes increasingly apparent that they are, at least in some respects, not human. They possess telepathic abilities and can control others' actions. The Children (they are referred to with a capital C) have two distinct group minds: one for the boys and another for the girls. Their physical development is accelerated compared with that of humans; upon reaching the age of nine, they appear to be sixteen-year-olds.
The Children protect themselves as much as possible using a form of mind control. One young man who accidentally hits a Child in the hip while driving a car is made to drive into a wall and kill himself. A bull that chased the Children is forced into a pond to drown. The villagers form a mob and try to burn down the Midwich Grange, where the Children are taught and live, but the Children make the villagers attack each other.
I was "made" to read this novel by my school. I had no idea that cuckoos lay their eggs in other bird's nests, so I missed the title's meaning. I'd just read To Kill A Mockingbird, which I loved, but was surprised that this was nothing like anything I'd previously read, and after one chapter I was hooked. I couldn't believe this was considered "classic", it was wonderful, modern, and creepy as all hell.
In 1960 it was made into a movie. There were some slight changes. No object on the ground, which worked better, for me. The movie is black and white, and beautiful. The children are incredible, and frightening. It's a superb rendition of the story, but was unfortunately renamed Village Of The Damned, which is a stupid title.
John Carpenter remade the movie in. 1995 under the same title. It's so similar, I couldn't see the point. Also the wigs they had the children wear look ridiculous.
Now it's a British series, under the book's title The Midwich Cuckoos.
I was looking forward to it, but it's awful. The "village" is quite a large town, and it's not remote, or conservative, which makes the events far less shocking. The lead character has been changed to a woman, for no reason. The children aren't identical, but multi-racial, like their parents. They don't have yellow eyes.
I don't understand why it's using the novel's title, as it's completely different and not very interesting. I'm not watching the rest of it. Those complaining that the changes are warranted, are wrong.
Cold Wind Blowing (2022)
Oh it blows!
Absolute garbage. Touted as a modern Evil Dead, it has none of the talent or appeal.
A group of teens go to a cabin and some die. You never see the "creature", just flashes of an animal skull. All the characters are hideously annoying, they all argue and shout. It makes no sense and the main character drives off at the end, leaving her "friends" and dead brother behind. A crowd-funded film, that investors should be punished for contributing to.
Les Misérables (2012)
Just Miserable
Firstly, I want to know how this film is getting praise? The most popular stage musical in history with an audience of over 60 million patrons has finally been filmed 27 years after it's first staging in London. It has been recorded in many languages and twice filmed as a concert, and so the expectations ran high. It didn't deliver! The songs have been re-written, re-ordered or cut completely. The Prologue is abridged giving little idea of back story or character. The music is subdued and singing gives way to speaking. Hugh Jackman sings at the top of his range for the entire film, Russell Crowe can't sing at all and appears as if he is aware of the fact; distracting when he is supposed to be a domineering character. He murders Stars; one of the great songs of the show. There is no light relief as Sasha Baron Cohen and Helena Bonham Carter play the least amusing or threatening Thenardiers possible. Hard to ruin Master of the House but they succeed. The ABC Cafe setting is gone, and so we have no idea who the students are or why they're rebelling. Eponine's character has been reduced considerably. One Day More was placed after On My Own and instead of bringing the characters together, they separate leaving the "big" number without it's rousing finale. All reprises of Look Down are gone including Turning as well as Dog Eat Dog and the Thenardiers comedy song at the wedding. The singing is live, which in this case doesn't help. The only high point for me in this sleep-inducing endless monotony, was Anne Hathaway as Fantine. Her performance and singing are superb, even as she is singing I Dreamed a Dream after, her hair, and in this case teeth as well, have been sold. Boring beyond belief, I can't believe that anyone who knows the show well, could possibly enjoy this overwrought film version. The biggest disappointment in 30 years. Reviewers who are saying how close to the stage production this is, are deluded.
Long Weekend (1978)
OZ-ploitation classic
Cencorship laws changed in Australia at the end of the 1960s paving the way for a wave of, what are known as, OZ-ploitation films. Nudity, violence, sex and gore made them perfect for late night showings in the USA. Long Weekend is one of the most famous OZ-ploitation films of the 1970s. It gained a cult following and is also a favorite of Quentin Tarantino. Slow paced, thought-provoking,unexplained and atmospheric, this is a film that doesn't go by formula. Beautifully photographed and filled with uneasiness, this is a movie for those who love creepy and quirky, and especially the Australian brand of weird. The remake of the same name is atrocious.
The Mist (2007)
Mist the Mark
A ridiculous premise is made worse by unrealistic reactions and made for TV special effects.
The premise: A gateway to another dimension has been opened by the military (as they do), unleashing a fog filled with mutant creatures (although we only see glimpses of latex tentacles and cgi insects). The reaction: The residents hold up in a grocery store with only plate glass windows as protection.Constant warnings of dangers are ignored, a religious fanatic is allowed to start a rebellion, and the finale is so bad it made me angry. Despite 2 hours of harrowing ordeals the "hero" makes a ridiculous decision at a time of relatively low threat, making himself responsible for the only truly awful event of the movie.
The Wicker Man (2006)
A low point in cinema history
At this point in entertainment history saleability has become the leading factor in determining a project's go ahead. Every successful film of the last 40 years (even those of Asia and Europe)is being remade and mostly with disastrous results. Of all the hideous reinterpretations of recent years The Wicker Man takes the prize for the worst. The original 1973 film is a believable masterpiece with a setting, although a fantasy, that has an authenticity due to it having drawn on a real history. The re-make is a misguided attempt to relocate this historically founded story to a country that isn't old enough to have had such beliefs. The entire symbolism of the original is lost. Blind faith, virginity, ignorance, self-righteousness and temptation lead the original cop through the maze of experience to prove his worthiness. Nicholas Cage has none of these traits and is just a pawn in a ludicrous plot. The only good thing about this film is it has rekindled people's desire to see the original again and experience it's hypnotic charm.