This movie, like so many others (Remember the Titans, Miracle), follows the basic sports-movie formula: There's a guy, he's a jerk. Jerk does bad. Jerk must play by someone else's rules. Someone else's rules change Jerk, Jerk becomes good. Insert tragedy (Death, drugs, riots, etc.). Tragedy effects Jerk, makes him totally change. Jerk must now play championship game. Lots of close-ups on the sweating players and the balls. Jerk wins. Quote from coach or news or something that explains title. Credits. Weren't you touched? These movies can now be used to sort out the morons of society. Anyone who pays to see this in theatres must be slapped.
Reviews
4 Reviews
Family Guy
(1999– )
It has its moments, but unless you want it to be, not that good
8 January 2008
Pros: Stewie-Best T.V. baby I've ever seen. When I watch the reruns of the first few seasons, I look forward to another moment of Stewie.
Early series-I admit, this show wouldn't get less than seven stars from me if the quality of the original show was kept up.
Open-ended universe-ANYTHING can happen in the Family Guy universe. It's fun to think of all the pure outrageousness around.
Brian as a talking dog-If dogs could talk in dog situations, like being chased by the vacuum or car-rides, I think McFarlane and the boys have captured in perfectly.
Occasional Moments- One out of every ten of the cut away jokes are actually funny.
Cons: Peter, Lois, Chris, and Meg-Except for the obvious differences in appearance and minor tweaks in personality, these characters are VERY similar to the Simpsons. A stupid, oafish, over-weight dad, a usual moral mom with an annoying, naggy voice, a dumb, trouble-making son, and an often sad, unpopular daughter.
Brian as a person-Annoying, usual unfunny, and often ruining the greatest character on the show.
Stewie/Brian Tag Team Episodes-Cheesy, crappy episodes. In my opinion, they should put Peter and Stewie together more often.
The Evil Monkey-It gets real old, real fast. Like the first time you see it.
The Fighting Chicken-It gets real old, real fast. Like the first time you see it.
Use of Dead Celebrities-I mean dead figuratively. Half of the time, the stars they use in their cut aways are people I have never heard of.
Pointlessness-This is why many people find this show annoying. Nine out of ten times, the jokes come out of NOWHERE!!! One such joke was when they showed a married caveman couple arguing. For five minutes of my life that I'll never get back, I felt confused and annoyed. For a better idea of what I really think of Family Guy, refer to the South Park episodes "Cartoon Wars" parts one and two.
Early series-I admit, this show wouldn't get less than seven stars from me if the quality of the original show was kept up.
Open-ended universe-ANYTHING can happen in the Family Guy universe. It's fun to think of all the pure outrageousness around.
Brian as a talking dog-If dogs could talk in dog situations, like being chased by the vacuum or car-rides, I think McFarlane and the boys have captured in perfectly.
Occasional Moments- One out of every ten of the cut away jokes are actually funny.
Cons: Peter, Lois, Chris, and Meg-Except for the obvious differences in appearance and minor tweaks in personality, these characters are VERY similar to the Simpsons. A stupid, oafish, over-weight dad, a usual moral mom with an annoying, naggy voice, a dumb, trouble-making son, and an often sad, unpopular daughter.
Brian as a person-Annoying, usual unfunny, and often ruining the greatest character on the show.
Stewie/Brian Tag Team Episodes-Cheesy, crappy episodes. In my opinion, they should put Peter and Stewie together more often.
The Evil Monkey-It gets real old, real fast. Like the first time you see it.
The Fighting Chicken-It gets real old, real fast. Like the first time you see it.
Use of Dead Celebrities-I mean dead figuratively. Half of the time, the stars they use in their cut aways are people I have never heard of.
Pointlessness-This is why many people find this show annoying. Nine out of ten times, the jokes come out of NOWHERE!!! One such joke was when they showed a married caveman couple arguing. For five minutes of my life that I'll never get back, I felt confused and annoyed. For a better idea of what I really think of Family Guy, refer to the South Park episodes "Cartoon Wars" parts one and two.
Reservoir Dogs
(2006 Video Game)
Eh, it's okay.
28 December 2007
Warning: Spoilers
Pros: Psycho/Professional choices: Be a cool act or a crazy killer! Sweet! Mr. Pink's, Eddie's, and Mr. Orange's voice impersonations: Sure, they look almost nothing like Chris Penn, Steve Buscemi, or Tim Roth, but they sound closer than the other guys (except, of course, Blonde). And since while playing them you don't see their faces, it almost doesn't matter.
Mr. Brown's Level: Rather than penultimate, this should have been the final level. I found it difficult to maneuver through the street with red splats constantly popping up and a six minute timer.
Weaponry: It is frickin' awesome! Machine guns, MAC 10's, shotguns, etc.
Michael Madsen and Mr. Blonde: It's excellent that of the eight (nine, counting Marvin Nash) original cast members, we get tough guy "psycho" Mr. Blonde. And, if you judge by the levels you play the characters in, in my opinion, Mr. Blonde's are easily the best (Pink's still my favorite film character, though.) The defiance of the citizens: Like, I suspect, in a real robbery, the scared pedestrians will try and play "hero" running for the alarms or, if you order them around too much, pouting and refusing to move on your command. It almost makes you laugh to think of scaring the crap out of them like that (they're just video game characters after all).
Driving conversations: Your driving as Mr. Brown, you've been shot in the head, and about a minute into the level, you start on a story to White and Orange about being caught up in traffic because of a Mafia funeral procession. God bless the mindless conversation.
K-Billy's super sounds of the 70's: Listen to "Coconut" while shooting down a police helicopter. You don't like it? You can change the station.
Alternate Endings: Being a "Psycho," "Professional," or "Career Criminal" will earn you a different fate for Mr. Pink. You can go back through and earn all three.
Cons: Last Level: You start out confronting dozens of cops, no potential hostages. After that, you enter an ally and find your only civilian hostage opportunity, and if she escapes, twelve more cops on your hands. You then enter a building through the fire exit, walk down the hall, and your done. Sort of difficult, but TOO FRICKIN' SHORT!!! Animation and character design: The in-between movies look pretty crappy, and Joe looks like he's twelve! Brown, Blue, and White all have the same basic look: chubby and young.
Mr. Pink's dialog: I know he talked like this in the film, but every other command involves the "F-word," and it gets annoying hearing his nasally voice screaming that out.
Marvin Nash: Could they at least given him some hair! Not Psycho Enough: My big problem with this has been in driving levels: you can shoot every other car you pass by, and you may still get "career criminal" rating for not destroying enough of them.
No Hard Setting: You can only choose Normal or Easy settings, and this is a fairly easy-to-beat game. Players who complete "Normal," find all blueprints, and unlock the three endings will be disappointed.
In short, it's fun while it lasts and that deserves some credit.
7/10 C
Mr. Brown's Level: Rather than penultimate, this should have been the final level. I found it difficult to maneuver through the street with red splats constantly popping up and a six minute timer.
Weaponry: It is frickin' awesome! Machine guns, MAC 10's, shotguns, etc.
Michael Madsen and Mr. Blonde: It's excellent that of the eight (nine, counting Marvin Nash) original cast members, we get tough guy "psycho" Mr. Blonde. And, if you judge by the levels you play the characters in, in my opinion, Mr. Blonde's are easily the best (Pink's still my favorite film character, though.) The defiance of the citizens: Like, I suspect, in a real robbery, the scared pedestrians will try and play "hero" running for the alarms or, if you order them around too much, pouting and refusing to move on your command. It almost makes you laugh to think of scaring the crap out of them like that (they're just video game characters after all).
Driving conversations: Your driving as Mr. Brown, you've been shot in the head, and about a minute into the level, you start on a story to White and Orange about being caught up in traffic because of a Mafia funeral procession. God bless the mindless conversation.
K-Billy's super sounds of the 70's: Listen to "Coconut" while shooting down a police helicopter. You don't like it? You can change the station.
Alternate Endings: Being a "Psycho," "Professional," or "Career Criminal" will earn you a different fate for Mr. Pink. You can go back through and earn all three.
Cons: Last Level: You start out confronting dozens of cops, no potential hostages. After that, you enter an ally and find your only civilian hostage opportunity, and if she escapes, twelve more cops on your hands. You then enter a building through the fire exit, walk down the hall, and your done. Sort of difficult, but TOO FRICKIN' SHORT!!! Animation and character design: The in-between movies look pretty crappy, and Joe looks like he's twelve! Brown, Blue, and White all have the same basic look: chubby and young.
Mr. Pink's dialog: I know he talked like this in the film, but every other command involves the "F-word," and it gets annoying hearing his nasally voice screaming that out.
Marvin Nash: Could they at least given him some hair! Not Psycho Enough: My big problem with this has been in driving levels: you can shoot every other car you pass by, and you may still get "career criminal" rating for not destroying enough of them.
No Hard Setting: You can only choose Normal or Easy settings, and this is a fairly easy-to-beat game. Players who complete "Normal," find all blueprints, and unlock the three endings will be disappointed.
In short, it's fun while it lasts and that deserves some credit.
7/10 C
Pulp Fiction
(1994)
My Personal Favorite
27 December 2007
I defy those who call this a bad movie (though I know that's a minority). It isn't trying to send a message. It's just three entertaining stories. Tarantino's speciality is outrageous realistic fiction, with pointlessly hilarious conversations in between these events. The opening, where it tells what "pulp" content is tells us what the film will be. It's supposed to be violent, with profanity, and drugs. Tarantino though a weirdo with a big ego and a huge chin who works on a lot of crap, is my favorite director. I even liked "Death Proof" and his part in "Four Rooms." He isn't really aiming to please everyone. Pulp Fiction was a fictional story with pulp material. If your not into that, it's not for you. Tarantino's choice of dialogue is justified, at least in my opinion, by one thing. His characters are complete losers and jerks! Travolta's, and apparently Jackson's characters are on heroine. Stoltz is a dealer, Willis is frustrated boxer, etc. I don't recommend that word choice, though. "Pulp" isn't everyones type, but it is what it's supposed to be. In my opinion, very entertaining, hilarious for odd reasons, an overall classic. It's number 5 spot on the top 250 is well deserved.
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