michael0100 Reviews

Beowulf (2007)

not worth downloading.

[1 March 2008]

5 minutes in both I and the the year old agreed this didn't do it for us. Drag. Fortunately we had an old Dirty Harry movie around so all was not lost. Problem is that it is some form of computer animation. Granted, its better than Bugs Bunny or Scooby Doo, but still, when you tune into Beowulf, its a complete turn off when it feels like Shrek. far better to pick up 2005's Beowulf & Grendel. I gave it a 1 (there are only two numbers worth pick, 1 or 10)

OK, needs 10 lines of text to qualify for IMDb's verbosity rule. need i keep going? there. Well, how about them Leafs? is that enough, lets try again

Weirdsville (2007)

a sad DNF, i tried but just couldn't finish it

[4 February 2008]

this could have been a really fun/funny movie - a lot could have been done with the premise & story. unfortunately its a DNF because of the poor execution.....for example the scene when the drug dealer/loan shark is shark is threatening them in the alley....oooohhh, shivers of disgust. i felt so embarrassed for whoever made that movie, real face turning red stuff.

It's a compelling argument against government subsidization of the movie & TV biz....we all know what socialism does to an economy, this is what it does to a movie. Sorry my fellow Canucks, i only have so many hour on this planet, from now on if its made in Canada, I'm not watching (unless its by my friend Kevin Sullivan).

When a Man Falls (2007)

a new low water mark

[2 February 2008]

The movie that will make all others shine. American Pie becomes an epic artistic accomplishment in comparison. To its credit, somehow it does manage to out-bore watching paint dry, out depress tax return season, and generally is the only movie i can think of that's worse than an hour and a half with your dentist.

This must be the worst movie ever made. 1.5 hours of your life are stolen from you with zero interest, humor, plot, story, emotion, or even drab dialog given back in return. How could they make a movie about nothing and just keep going sideways, on and on. I kept waiting for something to happen; a redemption that brilliantly ties it all together. Something to make it worthwhile. Surely the boring, depressing nothingness is like the start of Bolero, that we need hang in there to be amazed with some forthcoming stroke of brilliance tying it together? don't hold your breath, there's no crescendo in this one, the entire movie doesn't rise above a sad whimper.