Being in my early 30's and an avid movie watcher, this one somehow escaped my grasp till about 5 years ago when i randomly happened upon it. And then again I managed to get thru high school without seeing pretty in pink. For the 99% percent of you who felt badly for poor Duckie, this movie might dull the pain and serve as retribution. Sort of. The film moves along at a good clip, and while the fake beard is silly looking, it's just the way it had to be. Gotta have something extreme to offset Cryer's adorable baby face and convince you he was 28 and not actually 22...I don't think he could .grow that beard now :) And Keith Coogan as his cousin is perfect. God I had such a huge crush on him when i was 9. But I do love the red heads. Anyhow this movie is great for a rainy/ sick day when you want something to entertain you that doesn't require your brain to do any heavy lifting. Silly but satisfying. And btw I long for the roller skate scene to still exist like it does in this movie...all chill and relaxed. At my place its roll like a demon fast and furious or get off the rink if you can! So not fun :(
Reviews
12 Reviews
Bob's Burgers
(2011– )
I should be sleeping...but watching Bob's Burgers anyway...
19 March 2013
I've loved this show since the start. As many have stated I've also gotten slightly bored of the Simpson's and family guy ( I still watch out of habit ) I was happy when Bob and his awesome family and friends emerged a couple years ago, distracting me from my sadness of missing King of the Hill. I've been in love with Jon Benjamins voice since I was 15 watching Dr. Katz then after that Home Movies. Archer rules. But Bobs Burgers is super re-watchable. The musical numbers are unforgettable, the story lines unique and the actors extremely credible, talented, and appropriate. The humor is often referential (sorta Psych-style), which makes me happy, and is also stream of consciousness style at times which makes it feel real and even maybe a little ad-libbed. Forget about how the animation looks...it's got its own thing going on. Funny in animation only counted back in Warner Bros.day, when slapstick was the main funny. I can watch this with my eyes closed and still have a laugh :)
Cannibal Holocaust
(1980)
Turtle anatomy, Makack brains, and wooden poles up your a**and thru your throat aside...this is one very realistic and social ponderence of a film...if that's even a word :)
4 October 2009
I had this film in my queue for almost a year before it finally found it's way to me...and only after I switched from blockbuster to netflix. After having exhausted pretty much every 80's American horror film 2 years ago, I switched my attention to the Italians who seem to have more imagination if not less money or acting talent. Yet they seem to do a whole hell of a lot more with it. Nudity is very plentiful all the same. More so actually.
My criteria in renting these sorts of movies is pretty simple...nothing after '89, and must include words like "banned," "gratuitous," or "cencored." This movie enveloped all rules I had, so...
Truthfully, and with no joking, this is probably the most disturbing film I've had the pleasure of seeing. Seriously.
I remember when I spent a week working myself up to watch Salo after reading 120 Days of Sodom. I was ready for the worst....things I would rather not describe, but for an easy example, would you get off sticking a red hot poker into some whore's eye socket and then defecating into it? Then eating it? Pretty gnarley stuff for a 100 year old book...but in the end, the movie was relatively tame; to my disappointment have to say ;) This movie however, felt all too real, and jeezum crow would PETA have a field day with this. I've never seen an animal killed for real in a movie aside from documentaries, and this IS NOT a documentary. They chopped, shot, and slaughtered live animals just for this movie, and that is ballsy to say the least. Which may be the reason it was banned in so many countries, though, it could've been the violent rape scenes, or that really real looking girl skewed on the pike.
The story is actually really ingenious...documentary filmmakers who take great advantage, in every way, to make their film dramatic and meaningful, even while they are the ones raping the natives, and burning the village. Just to make the God-almighty dollar. It's all in the editing, is it not?
Still, the effects were amazing for the time, and I'm still not sure they were all effects! Some of it seemed so real it makes me wonder...if they were willing to slaughter monkeys and turtles and piggies, maybe they were willing to take it a step further....and if they didn't, well damn! That dick-cutting-off scene almost made me wretch. Good on ya guys!
My criteria in renting these sorts of movies is pretty simple...nothing after '89, and must include words like "banned," "gratuitous," or "cencored." This movie enveloped all rules I had, so...
Truthfully, and with no joking, this is probably the most disturbing film I've had the pleasure of seeing. Seriously.
I remember when I spent a week working myself up to watch Salo after reading 120 Days of Sodom. I was ready for the worst....things I would rather not describe, but for an easy example, would you get off sticking a red hot poker into some whore's eye socket and then defecating into it? Then eating it? Pretty gnarley stuff for a 100 year old book...but in the end, the movie was relatively tame; to my disappointment have to say ;) This movie however, felt all too real, and jeezum crow would PETA have a field day with this. I've never seen an animal killed for real in a movie aside from documentaries, and this IS NOT a documentary. They chopped, shot, and slaughtered live animals just for this movie, and that is ballsy to say the least. Which may be the reason it was banned in so many countries, though, it could've been the violent rape scenes, or that really real looking girl skewed on the pike.
The story is actually really ingenious...documentary filmmakers who take great advantage, in every way, to make their film dramatic and meaningful, even while they are the ones raping the natives, and burning the village. Just to make the God-almighty dollar. It's all in the editing, is it not?
Still, the effects were amazing for the time, and I'm still not sure they were all effects! Some of it seemed so real it makes me wonder...if they were willing to slaughter monkeys and turtles and piggies, maybe they were willing to take it a step further....and if they didn't, well damn! That dick-cutting-off scene almost made me wretch. Good on ya guys!
Choke
(2008)
A very sweetly acidic film
30 March 2009
I'm usually pretty liberal with my praises, but always very forthright with my few critiscisms. From the start of this film I found Sam Rockwell's portrayal of Victor terribly authentic.
Then again, I is one of those people that didn't read the book. Sorry, but I guess this is gonna be a review from a POV of a typical movie renter.
Like I've said in other reviews, I don't like to waste my time synopsisizing (?). But I will say that I absolutely loved the story of a man who's been blinded and shielded by a mother who's now in a "looney bin," not knowing who her own son is , and the relationship he forms with one of the residents of the facility.
As you watch this man go from a human being who absolutely cannot conceive being capable of giving or receiving love, make a complete 180 into wanting to be all that he is not, is heart-breakingly sorrowful.
The end is almost chick-flick satisfying, only because it's hopeful and gratifying to think that a person this downtrodden by his extremely damaging past, can overcome his compulsions and learn to love. We're assumming.
Then again, I is one of those people that didn't read the book. Sorry, but I guess this is gonna be a review from a POV of a typical movie renter.
Like I've said in other reviews, I don't like to waste my time synopsisizing (?). But I will say that I absolutely loved the story of a man who's been blinded and shielded by a mother who's now in a "looney bin," not knowing who her own son is , and the relationship he forms with one of the residents of the facility.
As you watch this man go from a human being who absolutely cannot conceive being capable of giving or receiving love, make a complete 180 into wanting to be all that he is not, is heart-breakingly sorrowful.
The end is almost chick-flick satisfying, only because it's hopeful and gratifying to think that a person this downtrodden by his extremely damaging past, can overcome his compulsions and learn to love. We're assumming.
Blindness
(2008)
Almost worse than your favorite zombie movie....
23 March 2009
...in a way. Seeing how humans react to sudden mass blindness almost creates some of the same results. Confusion. Helplessness. Desperation. Desperate want for food, comfort, and relationship. They're terribly scared, sad, and needy; angry and infantile.
So for some reason, a contagious form of blindness spreads across some country (seemingly a non-country because the car plates are European, but no one bares a Brit-like accent to my memory) and the blind are rounded up and confined to a quarantine facility, where they are neglected with no clue to what is going on in the outside world.
Julianne Moore can see and is involved because she wants to be with her now blinded husband. She keeps it hidden and helps all the blinded in the facility without them knowing her secret.
The ending was satisfactory, though not completely expected. I was ready for something much more bleak.
Did you see "The Happening?" It's a weeding out sort of scenario I think. Appreciate life and the simple gifts you're given that you take for granted. Thank you that I can hear this beautiful music. Thank you that I can smell that pot roast. Thank you that I can have the use of all of my limbs. Thanks that I can speak and make love and multiply numbers in my head. Cuz you never know when it might be taken from you.
So for some reason, a contagious form of blindness spreads across some country (seemingly a non-country because the car plates are European, but no one bares a Brit-like accent to my memory) and the blind are rounded up and confined to a quarantine facility, where they are neglected with no clue to what is going on in the outside world.
Julianne Moore can see and is involved because she wants to be with her now blinded husband. She keeps it hidden and helps all the blinded in the facility without them knowing her secret.
The ending was satisfactory, though not completely expected. I was ready for something much more bleak.
Did you see "The Happening?" It's a weeding out sort of scenario I think. Appreciate life and the simple gifts you're given that you take for granted. Thank you that I can hear this beautiful music. Thank you that I can smell that pot roast. Thank you that I can have the use of all of my limbs. Thanks that I can speak and make love and multiply numbers in my head. Cuz you never know when it might be taken from you.
And you thought it took forever to get back into CA from TJ.....
23 March 2009
...it takes just as long the other way around in this movie. I have a lot of respect for what this film represented to people in '71. And I celebrate what it did to pave the way for the ideals that changed this country and, I hope, are still changing it for the better. The black revolution in film, which I believe this must have been nearly the first of it's kind to be pretty widely distributed concerning the "brothers and sisters who had enough of the man," is to be honored.
However, I found this film to be almost unwatchable. Almost.
I can't help it. I was uneasy and twitchy the whole time. The 60'ish style of almost constant repetitive music, dialogue, and visual, made me feel like I was tripping out. And I assure you that I was not. I wanted to kick the skipping jukebox. I wanted to shout, "O.K.! I get it! Just get on with it ! FOR GOD'S SAKE LETS GO!!!" It takes some patience and sticktoitofness...but the message is clear and you'd better watch your back cracker... cuz he's coming for you!
However, I found this film to be almost unwatchable. Almost.
I can't help it. I was uneasy and twitchy the whole time. The 60'ish style of almost constant repetitive music, dialogue, and visual, made me feel like I was tripping out. And I assure you that I was not. I wanted to kick the skipping jukebox. I wanted to shout, "O.K.! I get it! Just get on with it ! FOR GOD'S SAKE LETS GO!!!" It takes some patience and sticktoitofness...but the message is clear and you'd better watch your back cracker... cuz he's coming for you!
Taken
(I) (2008)
Kickin butt an' taken names
13 March 2009
I never thought I'd think of Qui-Gon Jinn as a bad-ass, but I liked be taken by surprise. No pun intended.
When I write "reviews" I'm not much into describing the film and synopsis and all (you don't need me for that, just IMDb that s**t) This movie is all about bam,bam,bam. THANK YOU MA'AM!
As in, I am Liam Neesan. I was a government fancy-pants. You took my little girl. I am gonna come to France and kick/and or decapitate your Albanian-girl-drugging/whoring arses. THE END.
For those of you who love the Jean-Claude Van Damm but sorta wished he had a "Real" ass-kicker inside of him and a "certain set of skills" that we all can kind of relate to...sort of..in spirit; this is a movie you will very much like. Be ready to suspend your disbelief; and don't even come to me all like, "he just wrecked and killed 2 dozen people and di'nt even get in trouble for it!" DEAL! Forget it! He will ram spikes thru your wrists, connect jumpers to them and electrify your arse "till they shut down the power for lack of payment." Awesome.
When I write "reviews" I'm not much into describing the film and synopsis and all (you don't need me for that, just IMDb that s**t) This movie is all about bam,bam,bam. THANK YOU MA'AM!
As in, I am Liam Neesan. I was a government fancy-pants. You took my little girl. I am gonna come to France and kick/and or decapitate your Albanian-girl-drugging/whoring arses. THE END.
For those of you who love the Jean-Claude Van Damm but sorta wished he had a "Real" ass-kicker inside of him and a "certain set of skills" that we all can kind of relate to...sort of..in spirit; this is a movie you will very much like. Be ready to suspend your disbelief; and don't even come to me all like, "he just wrecked and killed 2 dozen people and di'nt even get in trouble for it!" DEAL! Forget it! He will ram spikes thru your wrists, connect jumpers to them and electrify your arse "till they shut down the power for lack of payment." Awesome.
Drive Thru
(2007)
If you pride yourself on being a horror geek, you'll feel pretty smart...
10 March 2009
all by yourself...on your couch with your dog...at 11:00 am...on a Monday. But that's just me.
I'm not gonna summarize this flik because you can look it up at you're convinience at certain movie data-bases. Do it, then read me.
This is great for those of us who love to be scared s**tless by clowns, but love to see suburban home-boys take it up the you-know-what. O.k. so I wasn't THAT scared, but very amused to be sure.
So this movie LOVES paying homage to a plethora of 80's horror movies; "Happy Birthday To Me," "The Shinning," and "Nightmare on Elmstreet" just to name a few. The gore factor is good and sub-par; just how I like it, though the dialogue seems a little too on the nose, you know? Just a little TOO thought out and clever for it to come out of the mouths of these kids. It just sounds VERY scripted. Not very natural.
Morgan Spurlock (of "Fast Food Nation" fame) is the tiny wink of super cool in this teenage slaughter-fest, and "Jan" from "The Office" probably has more acting chops than anyone.
All in all, the story is more or less slightly above standard for a 2000-oughts movie, the B&G is pretty good, and Ouija boards aside, was pretty resourceful, if not just stealing stuff (see above) I'm a generous girl (surprise!) who loves cheap gore, so if you can watch this one for free (like I did) do it to it!
I'm not gonna summarize this flik because you can look it up at you're convinience at certain movie data-bases. Do it, then read me.
This is great for those of us who love to be scared s**tless by clowns, but love to see suburban home-boys take it up the you-know-what. O.k. so I wasn't THAT scared, but very amused to be sure.
So this movie LOVES paying homage to a plethora of 80's horror movies; "Happy Birthday To Me," "The Shinning," and "Nightmare on Elmstreet" just to name a few. The gore factor is good and sub-par; just how I like it, though the dialogue seems a little too on the nose, you know? Just a little TOO thought out and clever for it to come out of the mouths of these kids. It just sounds VERY scripted. Not very natural.
Morgan Spurlock (of "Fast Food Nation" fame) is the tiny wink of super cool in this teenage slaughter-fest, and "Jan" from "The Office" probably has more acting chops than anyone.
All in all, the story is more or less slightly above standard for a 2000-oughts movie, the B&G is pretty good, and Ouija boards aside, was pretty resourceful, if not just stealing stuff (see above) I'm a generous girl (surprise!) who loves cheap gore, so if you can watch this one for free (like I did) do it to it!
His Name Was Jason: 30 Years of Friday the 13th
(2009 TV Movie)
Don't freak out fan-boys....it's not personal, it's just a doc
24 February 2009
I'm feeling you guys...this is what I'm guessin' you're thinking' "...jeezum crow! Tell me somethin I didn't already know!"
O.K. so this overview of the last 30 years of Jason flix is a little bit preachin' to the choir stuff. Anyone who claims themselves a fan is not going to learn anything new here, though I myself found the extras a lot more interesting than the actual doc. (The Men Behind the Mask)
You know this is pretty much just a marketing thing put out for the new film which I haven't seen, though I would. Does anyone want to send me $11.00 to see it? course not. Since We'll be able to see it PPV two months from now. But I digress.
Still, the doc is fun to watch a bit, seeing what former fodder has grown up to be (notice Feldman is nowhere to be seen) and their take on their experiences is interesting. Some good stories for sure.
O.K. so this overview of the last 30 years of Jason flix is a little bit preachin' to the choir stuff. Anyone who claims themselves a fan is not going to learn anything new here, though I myself found the extras a lot more interesting than the actual doc. (The Men Behind the Mask)
You know this is pretty much just a marketing thing put out for the new film which I haven't seen, though I would. Does anyone want to send me $11.00 to see it? course not. Since We'll be able to see it PPV two months from now. But I digress.
Still, the doc is fun to watch a bit, seeing what former fodder has grown up to be (notice Feldman is nowhere to be seen) and their take on their experiences is interesting. Some good stories for sure.
Rambo
(2008)
The first Movie I've payed $10 for in 6 months...
27 January 2008
...and it was worth every penny! I'd seen the trailer some months ago and was sooo excited! But when I heard last week that the film was not being screened for critics (aka "we're afraid reviewers will skewer our film and stick it's proverbial head on a pike and no one will want to go see it"), I was concerned. But then my ever wise husband reminded me that Rambo is Rambo and Rambo is awesome! Screw 'em! Critics put little stock in kick-assed-ness. Sly didn't make this movie to bring home statues. He made it to bring closure to one of his most famous characters, and kick some serious bad-guy butt in the proccess! Rambo is a hardened husk of a man whom in this film, showing little more than an inkling of the emotional blubbering (although ultimately vindictive) vet of First Blood, manages to kick more ass than ever before. There is a massivenes of carnage and brain matter involved that will leave you happy as a kitten in a sun beam.
He's freakin' old, and done, and tired of the world. "You can't change what is" and all that. A spirited missionary and her ilk trying to bring spiritual comfort and meds to war-torn Burma commission him to boat them to a local village. From this point on it's all laugh-out-loud, hand-clapping awesomeness. I don't want to spoil it, but then, my descriptions could not even begin to do justice to the goings ons. Just see it. If you like Sly and guns and guts and exploding heads, JUST SEE IT!
He's freakin' old, and done, and tired of the world. "You can't change what is" and all that. A spirited missionary and her ilk trying to bring spiritual comfort and meds to war-torn Burma commission him to boat them to a local village. From this point on it's all laugh-out-loud, hand-clapping awesomeness. I don't want to spoil it, but then, my descriptions could not even begin to do justice to the goings ons. Just see it. If you like Sly and guns and guts and exploding heads, JUST SEE IT!
The Hills Have Eyes
(2006)
For those who thought of the first...
18 September 2006
For those of you who saw the original version of this film ('77) and for those of you who saw it in your youth as I did, and thought to yourselves, "Hmmm, that wasn't nearly as sick and/or violent as I'd expected it to be...what with all the hype and such..." well as good and fabulous as Mr Craven is, and he is... this 2006 version made me want to wretch...and I am a full blown, hard core, gore hound. I haven't felt this sick to my stomach since "Meet the Feebles." Call me a pussy if you will, but as a human woman, the things I witnessed (?) in this film made me sick, and I commend the makers for that...it was deranged and foul in every sense, without giving anything away. And I loved It! It was sick and nasty and wrenching. The blood, guts, rape, and canine revenge, were just what I wanted that gloomy Wednesday in "sunny" San Diego. So just take my word for it. You already know if you are up for this; But then I saw the unrated version. See that. You'll be upset, if not just a little. Long story short: If you like nasty, gory, bloody stuff, then you'll love this. Love to ya'll from SD!
The Attic Expeditions
(2001)
Worthy of straight-to-cable
12 May 2006
By nature, I am lured into the crap of "STARZ ONLY HERE," their B-Flix of the holy hellish. You know, just bad horror flix. This one however, exceeded my expectations by a margain. I actually thought I'd guess what the ended would come out to and yet, I was wrong, mostly. Maybe I'm not the smartest of movie-geeks, but "the man" will often pull the wool over my face and present me with a climax I did not anticipate. Seth Green is the best and most believable character in this movie (though I can't deny Colms as he is a legend among films of this genre). The gore is adequate but mostly lacking in realism. The blood is bad in chemistry. The story isn't bad. Actually it's kind of good, but the production quality isn't what it could be, and so I'm a snob I guess. I gave it a 7, so I think it's worth watching just because I didn't guess the end...but I'm no genius, just a girl that loves blood and guts. And boobs...there were not enough boobs. Though there were some. Crazy girls don't count though, right? Don't pay 3.99 for this, but watch it if it's free...rock on!
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