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Reviews
The Elephant Man (1980)
THIS IS MY FAVORITE MOVIE
There is no words I can use to describe this movie. It is simply moviemaking at its best. Watch it, You'll be changed forever. I was. This is my #1 Movie. I cried 5 times the last time I saw it. You will be so troubled and disturbed afterward but so uplifted. You will never forget The Elephant Man.
Collateral Damage (2002)
Get ready for Arnold as you've never seen him before. (really!)
This is NOT your typical Arnold fare. I was shocked. Arnold has emotion, feeling. He actually acted. I am a big fan of his, but everyone knows that his acting skills are mediocre at best. Not here. He was ACTING. This is a different Schwarzenegger experience. He wasn't a superman with a machinegun. He was an average musclebound human being. He could be hurt and killed. This is one of the key reasons this movie carried well with me. It did, (as in most Schwarzenegger's) have it's lame and cheesy moments. In fact, The film doesnt really get that exciting until the second half, But when you get there, hold on. It packs more and more heat until it hits you with a mean twist of an ending. The other actors were great in their roles, and the story is a whole let more believable then your typical 100 on 1 Ah-nuld formula. This is a movie can enjoy without being a Schwarzenegger fan. This truly is Arnold as you've never seen him before. See this movie, Arnold is so different, you may not even recognize him. He deserves the title at last, Actor.
Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002)
One big penis joke. For 93 minutes...
I came into this movie with such high hopes. I left in shock. This movie was literally a rerun of Austin Powers 2, which was good. Jokes intended to be funny were ridiculous. All of the new jokes were funny, Unfortunately, they were few and far between. This is such a horrible way to end the series. I loved the second movie. Third time is NOT a charm. The new characters introduced were unfunny, The old ones, even worse. Austin has DEFINITELY lost his mojo. I laughed maybe three times. This formula, sadly, is getting very old very fast. NOT recommended. You will be very disappointed, Watch Austin 2 and you've seen it all. :( 2 of 5 stars
The Terror (1963)
I really don't know what to think of this.
OK, The movie looked very cheap all the way through. It was interesting to see a very young Jack Nicholson. The movie starts out fairly well, but it gets murderously repetitive as it progresses. Some pretty decent 60's special effects relieve you from your boredom, but this film is still weak. The plot is more twisted than a tree form a Dr. Seuss book, and impossible to understand. You should only watch this film to see young Jack Nicholson or some decent 60's Special effects. The film itself is very uninteresting. 2 of 5 stars
House on Haunted Hill (1959)
Had a lot more potential
This movie had some great special effects, and the story line was great. The scary creatures, however were not frightening at all, and they don't really seem to belong. It is as if they were just added there with no place at all. Anyway, Most people probably aren't *dumb* enough to be scared of them. This movie would have been great as a mystery film, sans-ghosts. I really had a difficult time being scared, but the special effects were exceptional for the time period. It is a shame that the ghosts detracted from the great movie this could have been. The acting was great and the film was shot in typical 50's style, with all applicable stereo-types. 4 of 5 stars for the special effects.
Psycho III (1986)
For Psycho fans, it's great.
Okay. I will be very honest. It took two times to get me to like this film. The first time I watched it, I thought it sucked. The second time, however, it was terrifying. Anthony Perkins puts on a great performance as Norman Bates, again. This was not as good as Psycho II, but it is a great addition to the Psycho series, and an okay film on its own. You DO have to watch the first two Psycho films to understand this one, and you have to be quite a Psycho fan to enjoy it, but I liked it. Rent first, then buy.
There were several aspects of this film I liked, many I did not like. This film has far too much nudity for a Psycho film. There is one scene that I feel belongs in a porn film, it is forgivable, however.
The film was suspenseful and frightening, Norman on the brink of insanity as always... The Bates family tree gets more twisted around with each sequel. I like this movie, but it is definitely not for everyone.
One big point that almost kills the film is that, at first, it seems like a rerun of Psycho II, I also thought that there were far too many flashback scenes.
The end of the film sells it and makes it all worthwhile and scary.
POSSIBLE SPOILER
We finally get to see Norman talking with "Mother" in her voice, and see Norman dressed as mother again. The end was liberating. Norman is set free from Mother's evil...or is he...?
Psycho II (1983)
The greatest sequel since The Godfather II!
This is probably the best sequel I have ever seen. It keeps you guessing. There are continuous connections to the first Psycho film. The acting of all the characters is superb. The ending is so bizarre you must watch the film to believe it. Anthony Perkins acts so well that, you actually begin to have pity on him. You are constantly seeing his struggle to remain sane. I definitely recommend this film to anyone. 5 of 5 stars
Hercules in New York (1970)
Lower your standards to sea level, and this is Steven Speilberg
True, this movie is as lame as you can get. But hey, give Arnie some credit! This was his FIRST movie. He didn't know what the hell he was doing! The material is cheap and grossly unoriginal and the SFX are unbelievably fake looking. You should watch this because it is a true peice of Schwarzenegger history. It is actually quite funny and very watchable. Don't expect quality, but you can expect a few good laughs. 1 of 5 stars.
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
Dangerously OVERRATED
I CANNOT believe that this film got such high ratings. My entire family all agreed that it sucked. The film was far too long. The movie was repetitive and unoriginal. It felt like a second Harry Potter. There was traveling, then fighting evil monsters, traveling, then fighting evil monsters, again and again. The first hour was interesting but as it progressed it failed. I must agree that the visuals in the movie were fantastic. The special effects were real looking for the first time ever. The scenery was stunning. I might recommend the movie for visuals only. The movie was almost three hours long and totally boring. 3 of 5 stars.
Wrongfully Accused (1998)
Absolutly Hilarious!
I consider this movie to be one of the funniest movies i have ever seen. Very clever movie spoofs. Leslie Neilsen is so funny. The jokes were always coming, and easily understandable. I would recommend this movie to anyone who wants to laugh for a long time. 4.5 of 5 Stars!
Jaws: The Revenge (1987)
A misinterpreted film.
!!Spoilers Ahead!! Ok, Here we go... Ellen Brody revisits the terrors of Shark attacks when her son is killed by a shark. She then is convinced that A shark is out to kill her family because She husband and sun killed three sharks in the past. She moves to the Bahamas to be safe, and the shark follows her. Meanwhile, Ellen Brody falls in love with a pilot and begins to recover form her shark phobia, but it is reawakened when the shark attacks and/or kills several people. She boards a small boat and heads toward the shark for a final showdown.
MY TAKE ON ALL OF THIS: Alright, The storyline is quite cheesy. The acting is fine. The shark ends up dying when the boat crashes into it. (It does NOT get poked with a stick, as many think,) The death is still VERY unclear. Another point, The shark only kills TWO people in the entire film. There are also many factual errors, (Shark like colder water, Sharks can't follow you across the world, They can't roar etc.) The film itself is quite bearable. After all, what would you expect from a 4th installment? The major letdown is the ENDING!! Very uncreative. The rest of the film is OK (2 of 5 stars)
Fail Safe (1964)
Intensely Powerful
This movie was great. It may seem boring to many younger teenage crowds, but you need to take into consideration the era in which this was made. The SFX were terrific for 1964. It was heart pounding and very scary at times. The acting skills of the entire cast are superb. I highly recommend this movie to anyone who wants to know more about the cold war. 4.5 of 5 stars!
The Mummy Returns (2001)
A Great Sequel
When the movie started, I groaned and thought, "Oh, no! another sequel just like the original." But then, it just got better and better. All the characters were great! The special effects were super! The story was good and the action kept coming. Brendan Frasier returns with a bang. One of the best sequels there is. Highly recommended for action fans. 4 out of 5 stars!
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997)
Awful Trash
I consider this to be the WORST film I have EVER seen. The movie is far too caught up in SFX. The acting is just TERRIBLE. This film is an embarrassment. Well, You say, This is a martial arts movie, The acting is not important. The fight scenes were short, stupid, and impossible. 1 out of 5 stars
Jaws 3-D (1983)
I Liked it...
I can't understand why people attack this movie. The acting was fine. The SFX and directing are obviously not going to be as great as the original because there is no Spielburg. The shark in my opinion looked good enough. Too many people watched this movie expecting it to by like Jaws (1975). If you lower your standards, this movie is very entertaining. 3 out of 5 stars.