Change Your Image
bryguy_1942
Reviews
Gerry (2002)
wtf movie is this?
Yes this movie is soooooooooooooooooooooo sloooooooooooooooooow.
There are some scenes where it can go about 5 minutes of landscape at a time. no people, no dialogue, and sometimes no music. these two morons say the word "gerry" and "crows-nesting" so much that it starts to seem unnatural. The (small amount of) acting in the film was good very realistic. The complete boredom of wandering through the desert is quite boring as well, which is probably exactly what it would be like to wander around in the desert. But why would you ever call that entertainment? Whatever meaning or moral or message (if any) was present, I didn't feel like i got it.
This movie is the equivalent of a Jackson Pollock work of art.
Takhté siah (2000)
Confusing Waste Of Time
I've seen a lot of foreign movies and enjoyed them. I rarely comment on any film whatsoever, but this one came so highly praised and so poorly performing that I had to comment on it and warn others. What the &*^$ where the people at Cannes thinking when this was given the Jury Award? I have no idea...
Get ready to watch a very slow account of two traveling teachers as they accompany other travels on their way across the Iraq/Iran border. I could not stop watching the movie because I was waiting for something to happen. It didn't. The teachers constantly try to teach people how to read and write, but everyone ignores them. I mean, seriously ignores them. Every time one of them asks a question they have to repeat it about 5 times The others travelers are permanently depressed and silent. Its hard to have any sympathy for them: there is extremely little known about the characters, no development, they show no willingness to accomplish anything except trek across the next mountain and hide from unseen helicopters and soldiers.
The one positive comment I could make is that the landscape backdrops are quite amazing and the people are realistically gritty.
By far the biggest disappointment.
Jesus Camp (2006)
Oh.....my....god.....(no pun intended)
This should have been classified as a horror film, I was afraid. The whole movie I wanted to grab the boy Levi and talk to him about what he believes. I wanted to pick him up and shake him really hard and tell him to start thinking for himself and start basing his beliefs on logic and reason.
Why are people this way? Its the most fascinating and disturbing thing to me, I just can't understand it. I am so so very afraid of what these people are teaching children. Fisher should be jailed or psychoanalyzed, perhaps both.
No matter who you are and what you believe, the stuff in this movie might strike you as the Christian's answer of Islamic Fundamentalists. They teach kids to be radical evangelists during their childhood, while instead they should be riding dirt bikes, playing soccer, or making friends.
Dads (1997)
Not terrible, nowhere near good
Headrazz has the right idea. I got the tape like he did and I have to say it was one big waste of a half hour. The sitcom wasn't really bad, it was just totally uninteresting. It had archetype characters who were the typical lovable buffoons who can't do anything right but have a heart of gold and the maturity of 16 year old. The kids were heartbreakingly typical too, making wise-guy light hearted comments to there parents in a way that strikes me as trying way too hard to be cute. The plot is borrowed from countless other sitcoms too: three struggling dads trying to raise their kids and getting into all the old shenanigans. Even the teacher was the tough German matriarch who's motherly criticism to the dads even I could have written. All in all, I'm very glad this show never made it. It wasn't terrible but it was nothing new, nothing interesting, and nothing you wouldn't see on a different show. The only difference is the writers' angle of centering the show on three divorced dads: the immature playful dimwitted mechanic, the nervous sarcastic businessman, and the normal one. Kinda sounds like Joey and Chandler from friends with Mr Normal to balance it out.