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Reviews
The Fog (2005)
Why bother?
Don't. Just don't. This is by far the most ridiculous way to waste time and money on remakes. Not scary. Pitiful score that doesn't come close too as haunting as the original. Almost zero special makeup effects on the kills. The ghost makep was cool but relied too much on CG to doctor it up. Showing the human side to the ghosts in the umpteen flashbacks took away all of its fear of them. It's just cookie cutter filmmaking. This had so much potential but failed to deliver.
Ive come up with some brilliant ideas that are way better than watching this awful remake. Clean out litter boxes. Collect roadkill. Put that fungicide on those nasty toenails you've been putting off. Count election ballots by hand. Stack BB pellets.
Red Snow (2021)
Come on Hammer !
What a absolutely horrible way to re-launch Hammer. This film was incredibly predictable. It wasn't funny. It wasn't enjoyable. It was just plain dumb and juvenile. My goodness, Twilight is an Oscar winner compared to this. Vampires that can walk around in the day. Bah! Dennice Cisneros' acting was good. Not stellar but hey they take their ques from the director. Nico Bellamy as the GQ Cover vampire was pathetically hammed up Edward Ewell was solid. Had some good funny dialog. Too bad he wasn't in it more. Good acting chops there. Too many attempts to make me feel anything for the characters as there was zero character development. The less said about the one liner catch phrase the better.
Skinamarink (2022)
Any chance if a 4k remaster lol.
What the heck did I just not watch all the way through? Staring film grain, dead pixels, Lego, laminate flooring, 1/2 cut pile, pickets, nice MDF baseboards, bi-fold doors, hallways and an old TV. What a cast. I was pretty impressed with the not lit house and the lack of focal points to concentrate on. The need for Advil from the eye strain and migraine that followed by watching this wanna be art piece was useful. I couldn't even finish this and I never do that. I have also never walked out of a theater either but this would be the one time. I wish a certain streaming service would allow users to rate films so we can decide then at not later.
Halloween Ends (2022)
Really? This was a Halloween movie?
Spoiler alert
Takes forever to get going and the ' final battle ' was very anticlimactic. Sad really. The final film in this fantastic what if series should've been a bit more spectacular. The kills were substandard. There are physically no scares whatsoever in this film. The bullies were barely believable trying to be hard, especially mullet head. Laurie has had PTSD for 40 years now she's Suzy homemaker? Bloody hell. I gave it 3 stars just for the music and the Easter eggs which were very cool. Nice cameo by Nick Castle sans mask and a surprise survivor from Michael's wrath. There's one really cool set. Very well done. Nice scenic work.
The Haunting of Borley Rectory (2019)
An absolute snooze fest.
Wow. How does this stuff get made? I managed to just get passed that hokey Nun rising up from the brush. I gave it a few more minutes when that bloody hand tapped the table. I was done after that. Skimmed through the rest to give benefit of the doubt. This film physically has no atmosphere and horrible wooden acting. The art director and DOP tried to produce a ghost story worth watching but without any type of spooky camera angles, it just failed.