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Reviews
Resurrection (2022)
Awful.
I want 1.5 hours of my life back. I don't care how good Rebecca Hall can act. This whole movie is a waste of time. And the ending is a joke.
I'd rather watch Sir David Attenborough documentaries.
Stranger Things: Chapter One: The Hellfire Club (2022)
Disappointing
There was nothing Stranger Things about this apart from maybe 3 minutes of the 1:18 hours. This is just a high school movie:
I felt ripped off. This is not why I'm paying Netflix.
The Haunting of Pendle Hill (2022)
The decision to watch this movie will haunt me forever
Just awful. Bad acting, bad script, bad dialogues. Bad everything.
Who thought "Guys, this sounds like a great idea for a movie. Let's do this!
I've watched a lot of "haunting" movies and this one is definitely the worst of them all.
La casa de papel (2017)
Poor imitation
Almost everything about this show is awful. Who on earth did the casting? Most of this gang cannot act. The worst example is the son of that bearded guy. Cringe over cringe. He can't even fake laugh. Giggles like a toddler the whole time so much that you wish he is going to be first one to get shot to take him out of his misery. All the pretended coolness is so cringeworthy. The ridiculous "Pulp Fiction"-style discussion over the masks in the back of the truck almost made me burn down my house with fire.
The gang leader wants to make you puke particularly in the scene where the hostages are lined and he goes from one to the next and whispering them cringe into their ears. Trying to be so cool, but nope, he is not. Ughh. According to the trailer, it is revealed that nobody takes him serious anyway. Then the scene where the bearded guy "cracks" the 60cm thick main safe door with a simple blow torch. LOL. He cuts through a surprising only 1cm "thick" metal cover like through butter and then pops it open with an off the shelf screwdriver in under 5 minutes - what a joke. Really? The Spanish National Mint's main safe is that easy to open? Have these people never watched other movies to see how it's done? And all this time they are so adamant about being incognito - except 3 of them being unmasked for most of the time. And the hacker dude - clickety-click - fist pump, hacked the whole system with a GUI using Visual Basic. And forget about a one night stand - our "Little Lamb" seems to be after a one hour stand. The scene with the selfie is unreal. It's her phone - why is she panicking? And how does that dude think the photos will go viral - photos are still on her phone! The main character in search of "Little Lamb" is literally checking every executive room (rooms where teenagers would never dare to enter to make out) except the most logical places - the goddamn bathrooms! So many movie mistakes in 1 single episode. The big hairy brother dudes were introduced as the only weapon experts, yet everyone is running around like Rambo. Not a single scene was shown what in those 5 months has happened. Not a single scene showing the crew being trained in how to use a weapon. Alas the sad scenes where they shoot like in a cartoon. Spray and pray, I guess. Although, apparently the love birds had sex every day in those 5 months. In those 5 months there wasn't even a proper briefing by the "Professor". It is a miracle how he tracked down the main character. Not only tracked down but took those surveillance photos of her granny's house and then promptly drove to her to recruit her. How the hell did he know which public phone booth she was using? The list goes on and on. And this was only episode 1.
All those 10/10 reviews must be Spaniards who are voting purely out of patriotism or have never seen a good show/movie before. I could barely finish episode 1. I had no more cringe-energy left towards the end. I should have known better because the trailer alone gave hints about the cringe-levels of this abomination.
You want to watch a proper recent heist movie? Watch Army of Thieves. There are many many examples out there.
The Deadly Look of Love (2000)
crap
i can't believe i actually watched this but i guess i just wanted to know if this movie would get unintentionally funnier and funnier towards the end. and it did. the climax was the poorest performance ever given by the defence lawyer - so out of real life that even for a fictional story it was far too weird. no way anyone on this planet can behave in front of a court like she did. and probably the worst prosecutor on earth. why was he in court anyway? he did nothing and absolutely nothing to prove her guilty. a simple search of her house would have resulted in the find of the rings. but no go. he preferred to say "objection" 2 or 3 times during the whole trial - that was it. the blonde lunatic was given a truth-drug to prove her innocent but not Brett. the lunatic almost had an altar of Brett in her home that could have proved her sick obsession. but again no go. during the court scene i felt the silent urge to take the needlepoint out of her hand and bang it several times against her head. even real weirdos do not look that silly fake "i am innocent" like she did. and what does this movie tell us? never marry a woman with a life insurance: as soon as she falls down the stairs her husband will be thrown into jail, guilty or not. evil, evil men.