I'm giving this show three stars because it has a great premise, a decent cast, and good production values. The problem is that the writing is so bad that all of that potential is completely squandered. After getting off to a solid start in the first couple episodes, this series quickly pulls a Vasa and founders before really even sailing out of the harbor. This is the kind of show where the writers feel the need to have the main character explicitly describe the obvious thematic parallels between her dysfunctional marriage and her father's relationship to his Real Doll because, I guess, they don't think their audience can figure it out on their own. It seems to desperately want to be a biting satire, but it has no teeth, no wit, no understanding of technology or even, it seems, of human beings. There's a certain extent to which it also seems to want to be about the characters, but despite the best efforts of some of the performers, these people barely exist in the two dimensional plane. Seemingly significant characters hang around for a couple episodes then vanish with no consequence to the overall story, or they show up late in the season and do virtually nothing. By contrast, an inordinate amount of time is spent on scenes between the psychopathic husband and his assistant without any character development for either. It seems pointless. If the writers just want them to be the archetypes of the villain and toady, they should just go for that and spare their audience the tedium of their endless unnecessary scenes together. To a certain extent, those three stars I'm giving this are actually more damning than zero stars because, honestly, there is so much potential here that it seems like it would be nearly impossible to screw it up, yet somehow these writers succeeded.
Reviews
12 Reviews
Dirk Gently
(2010–2012)
A Mixed Bag
4 April 2021
The best thing about this series is the casting. Stephen Mangan makes for a nearly pitch perfect Dirk Gently and Darren Boyd is a suitably bland (not in a bad way) and dry-witted Richard MacDuff.
The worst thing, unfortunately, is the writing. There are many references to-and direct lifts from-the novels (especially the first one), but they are often handled in an inartful manner and are frequently devoid of the full context that made them funny and/or poignant. More significantly, this show made the bizarre decision to excise most of the characteristic pulpy weirdness of the novels. Mostly gone are the ghosts, aliens, alien robots, ancient gods, et al. Of the books. There are only really two notable sci-fi nods in this series and both are fairly unsatisfying, instead this show seems to have strangely made the decision to position itself as simply a less deductive version of Sherlock.
The worst thing, unfortunately, is the writing. There are many references to-and direct lifts from-the novels (especially the first one), but they are often handled in an inartful manner and are frequently devoid of the full context that made them funny and/or poignant. More significantly, this show made the bizarre decision to excise most of the characteristic pulpy weirdness of the novels. Mostly gone are the ghosts, aliens, alien robots, ancient gods, et al. Of the books. There are only really two notable sci-fi nods in this series and both are fairly unsatisfying, instead this show seems to have strangely made the decision to position itself as simply a less deductive version of Sherlock.
The Humor Has Not Aged Well
25 March 2021
Comedies generally age worse than other movies, and this movie, unfortunately, is no exception. Maybe if I had seen it in the 60s I would have thought it was hilarious, but I saw it 2021 and it didn't find it funny at all. I understood when things were happening that were supposed to be funny but they didn't make me laugh at all. It made watching this movie almost painful, like watching a comedian bomb on stage in front you. That said, it's a Kubrick film so it's pretty well put together. There is some starkly beautiful cinematography throughout, nicely done opening credits, a stunning set for the war room, and some interesting handheld camera work that seemed very far ahead of it's time to me. Most of the actors seemed like they were putting in a lot of work. I can't say anyone's performance really resonated with me, but I can respect the effort. So I give it five stars for craft, but nothing more than that because it's truly a tedious viewing experience.
Ready Player One
(2018)
Vintage Spielberg
16 April 2018
I've noticed quite a few reviews here from book fans complaining that the movie wasn't true to the novel. As a fan of the book, let me just say that's true but it's fine. The overarching story is the same. The fact of the matter is with a nearly 400 page novel packed full of pop culture references, some things would have to be cut to make it onto the big screen. Partially it's an issue of length. Partially it's just the reality that the planets were never going to fully align to allow use of many of the properties from the novel. Yes, I loved the 2112, WarGames, D&D, Joust, et al references from the novel as much as the next person, but still I felt that Spielberg captured the wonder and fun and the story of the novel accurately, even if he did so using different references. The are actually some things I even think were an improvement from the book, especially the way they re-imagined I-R0k. The bottom line is, if you're a book reader, just take this movie for what it is, an alternate version of the story, written by the same person who wrote the novel.
Vernon, Florida
(1981)
Dull
22 June 2009
Ever been on a train or in a bar or at a party where some socially retarded person corners you into listening to some pointless, rambling monologue about their job, their hobby or their relationship with their parents? That's exactly what this movie feels like. Back in the early 80s Errol Morris, the guy who made "The Thin Blue Line", went to the little podunk town of Vernon, Florida and filmed various residents flapping their gums about whatever they felt like talking about. Not surprisingly the movie is an excruciatingly boring viewing experience. It's only 55 minutes long but it feels like about five hours. It's considered kind of a cult classic but damned if I know why. It's seriously one of the worst documentaries I've ever seen.
10,000 BC
(2008)
Better than expected
1 October 2008
Mammoths and tigers and giant birds, oh my! Roland Emmerich demonstrates once again his ability to turn pulpy, b-movie schlock into a fairly high-quality and very engrossing movie experience.
I'm surprised to see so many user reviews on here complaining about the movie's historical inaccuracies. I thought it was very obvious even based on the previews that it is in no way intended to depict history as it actually happened. This is a movie firmly rooted in pulp traditions and really should be approached from a similar perspective to superhero movies. It's epic, but comic book style epic. I think if you keep that firmly in mind, you'll find that it's a very enjoyable movie. It may not be the greatest movie ever made but it's not a bad way to spend an hour and forty-five minutes.
I'm surprised to see so many user reviews on here complaining about the movie's historical inaccuracies. I thought it was very obvious even based on the previews that it is in no way intended to depict history as it actually happened. This is a movie firmly rooted in pulp traditions and really should be approached from a similar perspective to superhero movies. It's epic, but comic book style epic. I think if you keep that firmly in mind, you'll find that it's a very enjoyable movie. It may not be the greatest movie ever made but it's not a bad way to spend an hour and forty-five minutes.
Chariots of Fire
(1981)
Weak
3 August 2008
A movie that manages to somehow be both overwrought and dull at the same time, I guess that's some kind of accomplishment. The acting is mediocre, the direction is sub-par, and the script is terrible. Not once did I find myself caring what happened to the characters which is pretty sad for a drama. The best things about this movie are the score by Vangelis, which is terrific but completely at odds with the setting and tone of the movie, and the cinematography, which definitely falls into the good but not great category. I'm not sure why this movie ever won best picture. If you want to see a good sports movie from the 80s I'd recommend "The Natural", "Hoosiers", "Field of Dreams", or even "The Karate Kid" over this snoozefest.
Dial M for Murder
(1954)
Amazing!
3 August 2008
After years of wanting to see it, I just finally watched "Dial M for Murder" last night. What an amazing movie! It's so minimal that I wouldn't be surprised to find out it has been performed on stageafter all, almost the entire movie takes place in one room. The acting and direction are top notch and the script is amazing! With each passing minute comes another twist and another turn of the screw. It had me on the edge of my seat the whole time.
It's kind of different from other Hitchcock movies I've seen in that it's so simple and streamlined, but I'm sure any fan of his would love it (and has probably already seen it, I'm sure). But beyond that, I think the movie would appeal to basically anyone who loves a good thriller or tense drama.
It's kind of different from other Hitchcock movies I've seen in that it's so simple and streamlined, but I'm sure any fan of his would love it (and has probably already seen it, I'm sure). But beyond that, I think the movie would appeal to basically anyone who loves a good thriller or tense drama.
Gummo
(1997)
Lame movie, decent soundtrack
2 April 2005
Poor Harmony Korine, he tries so hard to make "Gummo" provocative and fails so miserably. One hackneyed caricature of middle-America after another is thrown at the audience, to very little effect. There's glue sniffing, cat killing, fistfights, child molestation, cross-dressing, and mullets, mullets everywhere. But who cares? The result is kind of like watching a remake of "Pink Flamingos" where all of the humor that made that film somewhat enjoyable has been removed.
On the up side, it does have a good, eclectic soundtrack. With music ranging from Black Metal bands like Burzum to Roy Orbison to more atmospheric stuff, I'd actually be pretty curious to pick up a copy of it up on CD (if there is one).
So in the end what are we left with? Unfortunately, just a bland, unoriginal movie with a pretty good soundtrack. Of course the same can be said of "Cool World".
On the up side, it does have a good, eclectic soundtrack. With music ranging from Black Metal bands like Burzum to Roy Orbison to more atmospheric stuff, I'd actually be pretty curious to pick up a copy of it up on CD (if there is one).
So in the end what are we left with? Unfortunately, just a bland, unoriginal movie with a pretty good soundtrack. Of course the same can be said of "Cool World".
The Exorcist
(1973)
Undeserved Reputation
11 June 2004
I wanted to like this movie. I really did. For years I had heard that it was one of the scariest horror movies of all time, and horror fan that I am, I knew I had to see it. So last year I finally did. And let me tell you, it's a bad sign when you find your biggest reaction to a horror movie to be laughter.
The first half of The Exorcist is loaded with long pointless scenes that don't serve to move along the plot or help to develop the characters in any way. The second half contains more of the same, punctuated with unintentionally funny scenes of Linda Blair acting "possessed". Basically the only thing I got out of The Exorcist was the realization that the whole concept of demonic possession is pretty goofy.
The first half of The Exorcist is loaded with long pointless scenes that don't serve to move along the plot or help to develop the characters in any way. The second half contains more of the same, punctuated with unintentionally funny scenes of Linda Blair acting "possessed". Basically the only thing I got out of The Exorcist was the realization that the whole concept of demonic possession is pretty goofy.
The Straight Story
(1999)
David Lynch Makes a Good Movie!
31 May 2001
First a confession, I've never been a fan of Mr. Lynch's work. Eraserhead was probably the most tedious movie I've ever seen. Dune was a jumbled mess. And the all the posturing and self conscious weirdness of Twin Peaks always seemed a bit too put on for my taste. But with The Straight Story, I've begun to think that maybe the man was worthy of all the praise heaped on him a decade ago. True the movie does contain some of his trademark drawn-out shots that bored me to tears in his other work, but here they fit the mood of the film.
One user has questioned the believability of Mr. Straight making the trip in two months on a lawn mower when he could have done it in a couple hours on a plane. I don't know what the real Mr. Straight's motivation was for making the trip in the way he did (maybe he was afraid of flying, who knows) but in the movie, it is a journey of atonement. Hopping on a plane or in a car wouldn't have absolved him of his sins in his brother's eyes, only the most difficult and demeaning journey could mend their relationship.
All and all this is an excellent movie. Both Richard Farnsworth and Sissy Spacek are one hundred percent believable in their roles, the story left a lump in my throat and the feel of the whole thing left me in awe.
One user has questioned the believability of Mr. Straight making the trip in two months on a lawn mower when he could have done it in a couple hours on a plane. I don't know what the real Mr. Straight's motivation was for making the trip in the way he did (maybe he was afraid of flying, who knows) but in the movie, it is a journey of atonement. Hopping on a plane or in a car wouldn't have absolved him of his sins in his brother's eyes, only the most difficult and demeaning journey could mend their relationship.
All and all this is an excellent movie. Both Richard Farnsworth and Sissy Spacek are one hundred percent believable in their roles, the story left a lump in my throat and the feel of the whole thing left me in awe.
Mystery Men
(1999)
One of the Best of 1999
24 January 2001
Here's a quick test: Do you love Buckaroo Banzai? Tank Girl? Big Trouble in Little China? Repo Man? Are you a Tom Waits fan? If you answered yes to these questions then you'd probably love Mystery Men. This is a totally wacky and unique movie, much maligned when it came out, but in ten years I guarantee it will be in the Cult Classics section of the video store. These are the movies that are too weird for audiences at the local multiplex and too commercial for people who want to watch "films" and drink latte. If you're an open minded person but not a film snob and you really like offbeat movies, check this out. And as with all these movies, watch it with someone else who will get the jokes.
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