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Reviews
Mission to Mars (2000)
They should have called it, "Mission to Uranus"...
I went to this pathetic film with visions of Kim Stanley Robison's books on my mind. Breathtaking vistas from the summit of Olympus Mons, intrepid explorers searching the far reaches of the poles for water, and tent cities built at the bottom of a crevas hundreds of times larger than the Grand Canyon would definitely have been possible. Instead I was treated to a bunch of retarded space truckers who did not even have enough sense to run *SPOILER* when a large alien wind worm leaped out of the top of a mountain and began gobbling them up. Don't get me started on the end. That had to be the lamest CGI alien I have ever seen.
Stir of Echoes (1999)
Kevin Bacon is a tease...
As soon as I hit the "Eject" button on the old DVD player, I thought to myself -- for the love of Christ in Heaven, why the heck did I subject my small town sensibilities to that festering bowl of Dog Snot? The best part of the film was the funky/trippy soundtrack to the interactive menus. I was totally hoping to see Kevin's massive bacon like in the stellar film, "Wild Things". I was waiting for the shower scene but alas, it never came.
The Bachelor (1999)
How much did this movie suck? A lot.
This movie sucked. Don't go see it. Don't go rent it. You might like it if you like horses, but if you don't like horses, don't watch this film. Bad characters, bad plot, bad acting, bad shots of horses. Bad.