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Reviews
Collateral (2004)
Good Movie, Typical Bad Hollywood Ending
If you haven't seen this movie, then STOP NOW....Spoilers ahead. Let me start off by saying the first half of the movie is taut and suspenseful and is pretty good adult escapism. Not a lot of BS and plenty of atmosphere. Tom Cruise is a very good actor and so is Jamie Foxx. I don't know that either will ever be Robert DeNiro or Denzell Washington, but they both make it look easy to act in a major film. Jada Picket Smith can act too, however she was helped by a limited role in the movie. My complaint about her is the same complaint I have about the movie. In the first half of the movie she plays a serious D.A. focused on her job. In the second half she becomes Olive Oyl. The second half of the movie starts to strain credibility and at the end, it's almost like Elmer Fudd and Bugs Bunny, shooting at each other but never hitting anything.....The ending of the movie is the worst of Hollywod babble...OK let's see...Tom Cruise is chasing Foxx and Smith at a subway stop, and he jumps on the back of a moving subway train, manages to grab on, and simply opens the back door of the last car to get in. Anyone who has ever been on a train knows that door is always locked...otherwise people would be falling out of the back of a train every day. Moving on - now we have two guys that get on a subway train at 5:00 AM (mostly empty - again not very likely) and they start blasting away at each other. No one appears to be racing off this train when it stops, and since the motorman is enclosed right next to Jamie Foxx, he may even earn himself a bullet or two from Tom Cruise during the shootout. If there is a conductor he doesn't notice or hear anything either. There are no cops around (even though they were hot on the trail 20 minutes earlier), no sirens, nothing...Does it make sense to ANYONE that after a 20 or 30-shot shootout, a dead body is left on the train, and the train just closes it's doors and goes on to the next stop? Who writes this crap??? How stupid are we supposed to be to believe this could really happen?? There are so many continuity and logic problems with this movie It would take an hour just to write it all up. If you're just interested in escapism, or if you're under the age of 18, you're more likely to just take the movie at face value and enjoy it. As for me, I'd just like to sit with the writers and the director and ask them if they are REALLY pleased with this thing...
The 4400 (2004)
WHO...WRITES....THIS...CRAP!
Oh please! What the hell was THAT!
What a shame I wasted 6 hours on this thing...The BEST Thing I did was tape it then watch it...I'll bet there was only 4.5 hours of actual footage. I believed the hype and boy did I pay for it!
I understand things need to be a bit contrived in order to ratchet up the drama...but there needs to be a LITTLE credibility! The main characters in the show all face painful times upon their return, but the situations they encounter with their loved ones for the most part WOULD NEVER HAPPEN! The writing and directing of this show wasted a very interesting premise. The story line was barely logical in it's best moments and completely illogical DOZENS of times. And the ending? Gee...do ya THINK the writers left the story threads wide open in case the network wants to order up more shows? In this case it's so blatant that they forgot to even PUT a logical ending to the show!
Joel Gretsch ("Tom Baldwin") and Jacqueline McKenzie ("Diana Skouris") should have watched a few hours of "The X-Files" to see how and investigative team interact. The both of them seemed to have been reading from Cue Cards...
Patrick Flueger ("Shawn Farrell"), Chad Faust ("Kyle Baldwin"), Kaj-Erik Eriksen ("Danny Farrell") and Brooke Nevin ("Nikki Hudson") were all pretty wooden, but at least they have an excuse - I have underwear older than they are....
Two new faces - Mahershala Karin-Ali (Try saying THAT three times with a mouth full of peanut butter) who played Richard Tyler, and Laura Allen, who played Lily Moore were very good together. I hope they get to work together again...but please guys not on THIS terrible project.
I recognized the writers (Behr, Wolfe, & Echevarria) from the "Deep Space Nine" TV series - the show which STUNK in seasons 1 - 3 and got really good after Season 4 began.... Guys - What happened here with 4400? How could you possibly be satisfied with such a sub-par product?
Overall - a 2 out of a possible 10, mostly because of the two new actors noted above. Otherwise it would be a 1 out of 10.
The Martian Chronicles (1980)
...And They Say "Showgirls" Was Campy!
There are a few movies out there that are so over-hyped that I've always hesitated viewing them for fear of being disappointed - "Raging Bull", "Blade Runner", "The Lord Of The Rings" films, and "Eight Heads In A Duffel Bag" all come to mind. Ray Bradbury's "Martian Chronicles" always had a special lure to me since I am very interested in planetary astronomy and have always enjoyed a writers interpretation of what our future in space may hold. I've never read the books, but I saw the videos available and bought them last week. And sure enough, these films are totally TERRIBLE! The Martian Chronicle series (the written series, anyway) is usually thought of as a "classic". But the films!! I can't honestly think of anything in the films that I thought were well-done, or even fairly well-done. The words that come to mind here are: Boring, Illogical, and Cheap. The special effects and models used in the films are cheap garbage and look almost as bad as those in "Plan 9 From Outer Space". The acting is not even acting - the actors appear as if they are reading off of cue cards. The writing is terrible and at times not even logical. The directing is non-existent, the many times the actors appear to be walking over to an "X" on the floor to deliver their lines to each other. The story is illogical and the sequence of events would never happen in ANY Universe. I am barely through the second tape of the series (there are three tapes in the set). The second looks like it will be even worse than the first. I doubt I will be willing to even sit through the third. What I find amazing is that these films were produced at the same time the original "Star Wars" Trilogy was filmed, and the difference between the two series is dumbfounding. Where the Star Wars films were exciting and dramatic, the Martian Chronicles are the exact opposite - each little story line is only marginally interesting, and each is filmed in almost a dreamlike sequence. I can go on and on and pick apart almost every scene in the Martian Chronicles films, but I think I've made my point. This has to rate as one of the bottom 5 films I've ever sat through. And if anyone can disagree with this I would appreciate hearing from them.
Five Easy Pieces (1970)
Two Hours For This???
This is a two-hour film that could have been made into a 30 minute film. Catherine's little speech could have summed it up:
"You're a strange person, Robert. I mean, what will you come to? If a person has no love for himself, no respect for himself, no love of his friends, family, work, something -- how can he ask for love in return? I mean, why should he ask for it?"
Even the ending leaves you thinking that this guy has learned nothing, has not grown at all, and is now drifting north, for no particular reason...
As Good as It Gets (1997)
This Movie Is As Good As It Gets...
I'm not into chick-flicks. Helen Hunt is the ultimate Chick in ANY chick-flick. I approach anything she's in with a certain amount of caution...And even though this movie rubs up dangerously close to chick-flick status, the saving grace in this entire movie is Jack Nicholson and his flawless timing and execution. The man is most definatly the ultimate acting machine. For me it's always been a toss-up between him and Deniro, but you know what? Lately Deniro is becoming too one-dimensional...how many different ways can you play "Jimmy Conway" anyway? By contrast, Nicholson is not afraid to take on different roles and regardless of the material, the man fills the screen with his presence. In THIS movie, virtually every line he has leaves you off-balance, appalled, and delighted all at the same time. This movie should be mandatory viewing for anyone after the age of 15...if for no other reason it shows how wildly off-the-road some lives can become...
Empire of the Ants (1977)
Raid!!!
Not for the ants...but for the writers of this crap. This thing is so bad it's...bad. I agree with the previous reviewer...it's not bad enough to become a cult favorite (Like "Earth Vs. The Flying Saucers or "Them!!"). It's just 70s-Style moralizing and bad science-fiction. It's not surprising that no one (other than Joanie C.) went on to anything more significant. You would not want to even list this thing on your resume if you were in it.
The writers and directors ought to be embarrassed.