Reviews
Die Another Day (2002)
Why do people like this movie?
I'm a Bond fan. A big Bond fan. I've got all the books, and all the movies. I've seen them all more times than I can count. This is quite possibly the worst Bond film ever made. It's hard to even call it a film. It's just a bunch of scenes, some good, some bad, that don't really make any sort of cohesive whole. The film is plagued by bad writing and just plain bad ideas.
Jinx's character was ridiculous. She has almost as much screen time as Bond, and gets to kill the person who betrayed Bond at the beginning. What is that about? Bond is out for revenge, and he never gets it. That goes against every rule in the Bond book. If a good guy wants revenge, they have to get it. Even Domino got to kill Largo in Thunderball.
This brings me to the films references to the older Bond movies. There are far too many of them. Yes, seeing the briefcase from From Russia With Love in the `Q' scene was cool, but with so many references to Diamonds Are Forever, Dr. No, Thunderball, The Living Daylights, and A View to a Kill (This is from just one viewing of it, they may have the whole Bond catalogue in there somewhere) it really feels like the film-makers are just throwing in all of the Bond ideas of the past with the hope that nostalgia can save this movie. It can't.
Further more, I'm not one to complain about special effects, but when they are so bad that, not only are they distracting, they are incomprehensible, something must be said. It's not that there's too much CGI; it's that there's too much bad CGI.
This movie has many other problems, too numerous to mention. If it wasn't a Bond movie; if it didn't have the whole franchise behind it, no one would go to see this movie.
If you must go to see this movie, enjoy the yacht club scene, the `Q' scene, and the Moneypenny scene as much as possible, because that's really all that's worthwhile. There was a lot of potential here, but it was all wasted. Let's just hope this doesn't become a trend.
J-Men Forever (1979)
Drugs are bad...but not in this film
Note: No spoilers included. There's not enough of a plot to be spoiled!
"Now, ah, Drugs are bad, m'kay?" That's what the J-Men think, and Rock and Roll is just as evil. That's pretty much the plot of the movie. Doesn't sound like much, but trust me, it's more than the movie needs.
In this movie, a group of geniuses have taken a bunch of different old movies and serials, (Mystery Science Theater 3000 material) and spliced them to form one gigantic laugh. You see the original footage, but you hear a completely re-dubbed (and much funnier) dialog.
There's Something About Mary (1998)
The Sickest, Most Perveted Movie Ever!
There's Something About Mary has got to be the down right most disgusting, perverted, vile, grossest, and sickest piece of crap I've ever seen! And I LOVED every minute of it! I really can't remember when I've seen a funnier movie. (Ok, ok, Animal House WAS better, but still!) This movie kicked so much unbelievable butt, I don't have words to describe it. From start to finish, it had me laughing my a** off. The movie was just about perfect, so I don't have any complaints to right. Good job Peter, and Bobby.
The Dig (1995)
A good game, but I expected more humor from LucasArts.
An astroid is hurling towards earth, and a team of astronauts is sent to blow it off course. Little do they know the astroid is actually an alien starship, which they activate, sending them to the world of Cocytus. The game that follows is all based around getting back home.
It's a very good game, with a classic LucasArts adventure game feel. The graphic are great; although as I'm writing this in 1998, they are a little dated. The scenery is still breathtaking and the voice acting is great. (Featuring Robert Patrick who played the T1000 on Terminator II.)
The only thing I didn't like about the game, was the lack of humor. Most LucasArts games (ie. Day Of The Tentacle, Sam & Max: Hit The Road.) have a lot of humor. I'm not sure why The Dig doesn't, I can only assume it's been done to make the serious situation seem serious. Still, I'd recommend this game to anyone who likes a good adventure game.
On last thing, after you play the game, read the book. It's really good.