- Sherlock Holmes: [to his friend, Harlan, who deals with stress by solving problems in the nude] You're upset. Look, look, if, if, if you need to disrobe, feel free. You're in a safe place. Just, just mind the furniture.
- Sherlock Holmes: Well, that's just it, you see. I'm-I'm... not sure I can. You were right. I mean, every potential romantic partner I have pales in comparison to Moriarty. That might sound strange, given what we know about her, but... I'm a strange bloke, aren't I? She fit. And I fear that... what we had can't be replicated.
- Dr. Joan Watson: Probably can't. But that's okay. I mean, falling in love with someone is not supposed to be the same experience every time. Someone else will be someone else.
- Sherlock Holmes: Suppose you're going to suggest I try online dating next.
- Dr. Joan Watson: Would that be so bad? Try something else.
- Sherlock Holmes: Such as?
- Dr. Joan Watson: You're the one who loves experiments, so experiment.
- Parole Officer: I guess I was wrong about Jimmy. He *did* have brains. I can see them all over his shirt.
- Dr. Joan Watson: How long were you his parole officer?
- Parole Officer: A little over six months. I told him just like I tell all my guys. Keep your nose clean, you'll be fine. Obviously, Jimmy didn't listen, and now *his* nose is at the back of his skull.