- Julia Wicker: Catching up on the news?
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: My timeline was post apocalyptic, and it wasn't this fucked up.
- Margo Hanson: [about Humbledrum] I love that bear.
- Fray: So do I.
- Eliot Waugh: Yeah, horray for bears, but we were kind of having a moment...
- Margo Hanson: No, honey, she *loves* him.
- Eliot Waugh: So, uh, not bear boss? Bear... boyfriend? Is that a thing in Fillory?
- Margo Hanson: Apparently very taboo, but like I told Humbledrum, as long as it's consensual, if I got my way, I'd say go hog-wild or bear-wild or bull-wild. He's very concerned about getting your approval. I don't think he quite gets that you're not even Fray's real dad.
- Eliot Waugh: [Turns to Fray] Well, then I will say what I wish my father had said to me: I'm so happy you're dating a bear.
- Fray: [Slightly emotional] Thanks Dad.
- Humbledrum: Thanks, Fray's dad.
- Josh Hoberman: I come bearing gifts.
- Eliot Waugh: This is like, 80% taco supplies.
- Josh Hoberman: I'm sorry, do they not have Tuesdays in Fillory?
- Josh Hoberman: Previously... on "Us".
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: What?
- Josh Hoberman: Just imagine, an montage. A group of fine looking grad students were invited to a secret school for magic, where a bunch of stuff happened that doesn't really matter until they ran into a mysterious figure. An answer to a riddle they didn't even know to ask...
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: It's you.
- Josh Hoberman: Do you want this recap or not?
- [Continues]
- Josh Hoberman: So yeah, it was me. Things were awesome. For a minute. We became kings and queens. Well, everybody but you. Everyone hooked up, I had a threesome with two harpies.
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: Just get to the parts about me.
- Josh Hoberman: You had a lot of drama with your hands. You signed a billion-year contract with the Library to help out Kady.
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: Wait, who's that?
- Josh Hoberman: [Surprised] Kady Orloff-Diaz? Love of your life? Looks like she could crack open your balls, because she can?
- [Penny stares blankly]
- Josh Hoberman: Well, it was a love for the ages. Despite the fact that Kady got in way over her head with some hedge witches. Especially her best bitch, Julia Wicker - their term, not mine. I would never... Whatever went down definitely made them ex-best... Witches.
- Margo Hanson: We've been trying to negotiate with the Fairy Queen for the last Key, but this is what we got back.
- Bunny: Eat my ass!
- Margo Hanson: We're not sure if...
- Bunny: Eat my ass! Eat. My. Ass!
- Margo Hanson: [Covers the bunny] If this was the Fairy Queen's response or this is one very kinky rabbit.
- Josh Hoberman: Now, if you would please refer to the hookup/murder chart.
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: Penny got with the other Alice. Interesting.
- Josh Hoberman: Now that we know who porked whom, let's go over who murdered whom...
- Quentin Coldwater: The only way to track Bacchus down was his Instagram and it looks like it got deleted for terms of service violations. Nipples, apparently?
- Eliot Waugh: It has been a struggle to bring this place into the 20th century. Yes, 20th, because when we got here, it was straight up Dark Ages, and we have to start somewhere.