- Tommy Newsom: Doc is in Hawaii.
- Johnny Carson: In Hawaii?
- Johnny Carson: Yes, he is.
- Johnny Carson: Lucky guy. What's he doin' in Hawaii?
- Tommy Newsom: I have - I don't know; he's probably honking on a conch, or something.
- Suzanne Pleshette: [on the fitness craze] I don't approve of it; I don't think it works for me. Gravity has worked for me. Everything is in a better place - and I don't want to firm it up and have it perky again. You never noticed it when it was up there!
- Michael Davis: [juggling two balls with one hand] The important thing is style... As a youth, I didn't quite understand this philosophy. Consequently, I used to practice and practice with two balls in one hand... 'til I was almost blind.
- Ed Begley Jr.: [on being arrested as a stand-up comedian] I did some of my best comedy work, I think, in that cell. You have to be funny to keep their mind off many other things.