- Michael Landon: [on the National Enquirer] I mean, for 40 cents - put it in a cup, put it in a container. Help some crippled children - do something decent with your money, and don't spend it on crap!
- Ed McMahon: Don't you think the federal government should protect Florida's fruit?
- Mediterranean Fruit Fly: Not according to Anita Bryant, no - they shouldn't.