- Keenan Feldspar: Hey, man. I don't know who you think you are, but you're not supposed to be at this table.
- Erlich Bachman: I don't know who you think you are, but men aren't supposed to grow tits, and yet there they are, atop your little paunch.
- Russ Hanneman: Fuck you, Richard Hendricks!
- Richard Hendricks: Fuck me regarding?
- Russ Hanneman: It's all over the blogs. You took our idea to Gavin Belson?
- Richard Hendricks: Whoa. I'm sorry. Our idea?
- Russ Hanneman: Yeah, the new Internet. We came up with that together, standing outside of my kid's school... former school.
- Richard Hendricks: Uh, no, um, you told me to name an idea, and so I named one. That was my idea, you were just standing there.
- Russ Hanneman: Yeah, pulling it out of you like a newborn baby.
- Richard Hendricks: Okay, but, well, if a doctor pulls a baby out of a pregnant woman, the doctor doesn't get to then keep the baby.
- Russ Hanneman: Okay, first of all, my ex-wife is fucking the doctor that delivered my son, and they're suing for full custody, so you're wrong. Second of all, this isn't a baby. Stop trying to change the subject, Richard!
- Donald 'Jared' Dunn: God, there's something beautiful about testing your first alpha. It's like watching a child take its first steps.