- Zimmerfield: You're a person of interest. Permanently. Even though you're not necessarily an interesting person.
- Todd Brotzman: That feels unnecessarily rude.
- Bart Curlish: It was good you decided to come with me.
- Ken: I didn't decide anything. You said you'd kill me if I didn't go.
- Bart Curlish: Well you decided it would be better to come with me than die. That was nice.
- Estevez: You didn't see anything weird this morning, did you Mr. Brotzman?
- Todd Brotzman: Yes. No. Maybe. I don't know.
- Estevez: Are you aware you just gave every possible response to that question?
- [Looks at Zimmerfield]
- Estevez: Eyebrows.
- Zimmerfield: [Raises Eyebrows]
- Bart Curlish: Dirk Gently you are a dead man.
- Ken: Who's? Who's Dirk Gently?
- Bart Curlish: You're not Dirk Gently?
- Ken: No.
- Bart Curlish: What are you kidding me right now? Then why'd you run?
- Ken: You have a machete and you killed Red!
- Bart Curlish: Why didn't you just say I'm not Dirk Gently?
- Ken: [shouting] 'Cause I don't know who that is!
- Bart Curlish: I'm a holistic assassin... I kill whoever I like killing all day and if I killed them, they were my target.
- Hermano Palacios: Well it's a same day termination, I'd have to delay the cheque.
- Todd Brotzman: Same day? What do you mean same day? It just happened today.
- Hermano Palacios: Yes today is the day that it is the same. Today is the day that it happened.
- Todd Brotzman: Right, but any day that it would have happened would have been the day that it happened. Listen, I need the money.
- Hermano Palacios: Yes but it's a same day termination.
- Todd Brotzman: What? It's always a day right? Things happen when they happen. They happen immediately. That's what happening is, it means...
- Hermano Palacios: No time, sometimes when things happen they don't happen.
- Todd Brotzman: Who are these people?
- Dirk Gently: The Rowdy Three!
- Todd Brotzman: But there are four of them!
- Dirk Gently: I'm wildly aware!
- Hermano Palacios: When you were in there did you see any kind of paw prints? They said they found paw prints.
- Todd Brotzman: Paw prints? Like a dog?
- Hermano Palacios: No. Also you're fired.
- Todd Brotzman: What?
- Hermano Palacios: Your involvement in all of this is kind of...
- Todd Brotzman: You can't fire me, I just opened a door.
- Hermano Palacios: Well some doors shouldn't be opened.