Unsolicited Material (2016)

Ed Surname: Self - comedian

Photos 

Quotes 

• Ed Surname - Comedian : In life, you never know what you're gonna get... unlike a box of chocolates that comes with a clearly written pamphlet.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : You only live once... unless you're a Buddhist.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : I've got people in normal jobs asking me 'how much do you get out of your job?' Oh, I don't know: there doesn't seem to be a creative satisfaction button on this calculator.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : It's easier to get forgiveness than it is to get permission.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : Oh but you're a rich man if you have your family's love? Hello, can I buy a house with my family's love please?

• Ed Surname - Comedian : Life's not about how many times you get knocked down; it's about how many times you get back up.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : My business studies teacher said I'd either be penniless or a millionaire, but never in between... he's right so far.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : If the grass seems greener on the other side, it's because it's been fertilised with bullshit.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : When they say money can't buy happiness, what they mean is material possessions don't fulfill your soul- but we're in a world where you do need money to care for your family.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : She says that after me, she could never marry again. I'm still trying to work out if it's an insult or a compliment.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : Luck is when preparation meets opportunity; you make your own luck.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : The only thing harder than not living your dream... is living it.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : Ruin your self-imposed reputation for a happier life.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : All overnight successes take about 10 years.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : A blank canvas... the same starting point as every artist, ever.

• Ed Surname - Comedian : You can please some of the people all of the time, and you can please all of the people some of the time. But I can displease all of the people all of the time.