- Opposite Captain Man: You've gone soft, Kid Danger. I think you need a double dose of vitamin fist.
- Opposite Piper Hart: [as the fight resumes] Let's use our words.
- Opposite Mitch Bilsky: I switched sides, and I helped you.
- Henry Hart: Yeah. Yeah, I saw.
- Opposite Mitch Bilsky: Yeah, Jasper said he was gonna give me free junk, but... I figured you could give me free junk AND stuff.
- Henry Hart: Oh, yeah? Would you like that?
- Opposite Mitch Bilsky: Yes, sir.
- [Henry knocks Mitch unconscious]
- Henry Hart: Not on my porch.
- Opposite Ray Manchester: That is not the Henry we know.
- Opposite Schwoz: Vhat?
- Opposite Ray Manchester: That Henry and that Charlotte are from an opposite universe.
- Opposite Schwoz: Of course. Dhat's vhy she looks so veird.
- Charlotte Page: Uh, have YOU looked in a mirror?
- Henry Hart: We just wanna get back home to our universe.
- Opposite Ray Manchester: And we need to get OUR Henry and Charlotte back HERE, 'cause THESE ones are lame!
- Henry Hart: Hey, remember, Ray, in every revolution there's one man with a vision.
- Opposite Ray Manchester: I have no idea what that means. See ya.
- [throws the switch to send him away]
- Henry Hart: Dad. Piper won eight tickets to this concert we all really want to go to.
- Mr. Hart: Ooo, that sounds fun.
- Henry Hart: Yeah, so will you please tell her to give us four tickets?
- Mr. Hart: Sure. Piper...?
- Piper Hart: No!
- Mr. Hart: I did my best.
- Opposite Captain Man: [with hand positioned in the formation of a Vulcan mind meld] You tell me what's goin' on right now or I will push my fingers right into your face.
- Ray Manchester: Look, I don't know who you two are, but you're not the real Henry and Charlotte.
- Opposite Charlotte Page: I'll stab your face and bite your throat.
- Ray Manchester: See, that's just a weird thing to say.
- Kid Danger: Wow.
- Opposite Piper Hart: What?
- Kid Danger: You're... you're so nice.
- Opposite Piper Hart: Aw. You're so nice for saying I'm so nice. Would you like me to bake you a pie?
- Henry Hart: Wait. If I have two minute left, I'm gonna use that time to make a heartfelt speech.
- Opposite Ray Manchester: Oh, my God.
- Opposite Schwoz: Oh, geez.
- Henry Hart: Listen, in our universe, Captain Man is a hero, who would never hurt anyone unless they deserved it.
- Opposite Schwoz: Well, what about me?
- Henry Hart: You're a freak in both universes.
- Opposite Schwoz: Yes!
- Charlotte Page: Why don't you shave that hair-tuft off the top of your head?
- Henry Hart: [quietly] No. No, no, no...
- Opposite Schwoz: Hey, in my universe this tuft is cool.
- Opposite Schwoz: Would you like some...
- Opposite Schwoz: [strums chords] Moosic?
- Charlotte Page: You know, Ray doesn't like you playing that thing in the Man Cave.
- Opposite Schwoz: But when the Captain's avay, the Schwoz will play.
- Opposite Piper Hart: [sweetly, as Kid Danger fights Opposite Captain Man for piper's life] Can't we all just have some pie?
- Opposite Captain Man: Just push the button, Charlotte. You're in the seat.
- Opposite Schwoz: [affected by nature's call] Don't say "urine."