- Grace Hanson: I don't know why she has to blow everything out of proportion. Ya know, I might have said some terrible things to her but I was drunk. I didn't mean it.
- Babe: Oh. Really? Did you know in North Korea they use vodka as truth serum.
- Grace Hanson: No they don't.
- Babe: Then Dennis Rodman's a fucking liar.
- Babe: You're the kindest person I know. And in all my many travels, my most dearest treasured friend.
- Frankie Bergstein: Yeah, you say that to all the people you ask to kill you.
- Mallory Hanson: Madison, honey, when you were with Grandpa and Grandpa earlier, did you say the "F" word?
- Madison: What's the "F" word?
- Mallory Hanson: Uh, it's a bad word. It starts with "F " You know, "fu" F-Fu...
- Madison: Fallopian tube?
- Frankie Bergstein: [telling Babe her final joke] I'll never forget what my grandfather said to me just before he died.
- Frankie Bergstein: "Are you still holding the fucking ladder?"