- Damon Salvatore: [scoops up Lily's undergarment, letting it dangle from the tip of his rapier] And here I thought she slept standing up like a horse.
- Caroline Forbes: [Stefan complains about bad dream] That's because you're sleeping on the couch, silly. What are you doing down here?
- Valerie Tulle: That would be my fault.
- [only got a towel wrapped around her]
- Valerie Tulle: I... I just wanted to let you know that I used the last of the shampoo.
- Caroline Forbes: Valerie, I didn't know that you were staying here.
- Stefan Salvatore: Stayed. Past tense. Just one night.
- Valerie Tulle: I should go... put some clothes on.
- Caroline Forbes: Yeah. You do that.
- Valerie Tulle: All right.
- [turns to leave]
- Caroline Forbes: Okay.
- [to Stefan:]
- Caroline Forbes: Explain.
- Stefan Salvatore: Okay. Lily wants to raise Julian from the dead. Valerie tried to scorch his body before she can get her hands on him. And that did not work out so well.
- Caroline Forbes: Not following how that's... our problem.
- Stefan Salvatore: Okay. If and when Lily welcomes Julian back into his body, he will find out what Valerie did, and he'll come after her.
- Caroline Forbes: [shakes her head] Yeah, just not connecting those dots.
- [chuckles]
- Stefan Salvatore: Well, then maybe you can just trust me that I know what I'm doing.
- [chuckles]
- Caroline Forbes: [sighs] So, what you're saying is... Valerie needs to disappear.
- [brightens up]
- Caroline Forbes: New name, new job,
- [stammers]
- Caroline Forbes: a country in a separate hemisphere.
- Stefan Salvatore: No, no...
- Caroline Forbes: Well, you just said that she was in danger. I mean, if I need to drive her to the airport myself, I will do that.
- Stefan Salvatore: [smiles] Mm-hmm.
- Caroline Forbes: [moves in for kiss] Unless you have a problem with that.
- Stefan Salvatore: [as she kisses him] You know, I... I really like this form of manipulation.
- [Caroline chuckles]
- Valerie Tulle: [interrupting romance] Whatever we're doing, we should do it fast. The Phoenix Stone turns people mad, and Julian's soul's been in it for over a hundred years. So, anywhere he is, I need to be as far away as possible.
- Caroline Forbes: Seattle looks nice. They got the Space Needle, great coffee, Mount St. Helens...
- Valerie Tulle: Rain.
- Caroline Forbes: [mutters] Didn't take you for much of a sunshine person. Um... I mean, there's always Indonesia. Aw, you could rent a hut on the beach and drink out of coconuts.
- Valerie Tulle: Be nine thousand miles away from your boyfriend in either direction.
- Caroline Forbes: [closes laptop] Let's put a pin in locations for a moment and talk names... because Valerie Tulle is way too traceable. I'm thinking... Matilda!
- [sounding way deceitful]
- Caroline Forbes: Oh, you could totally pull off Matilda. Matilda Pettigrew. From Liverpool, England.
- [chuckles]
- Caroline Forbes: Wait, you wanna write it down?
- Valerie Tulle: You're handling me like I'm a wounded bird... like I'm some victim, but I'm not. When Stefan kills Julian, he can't hurt anyone else. And I can just put this whole mess behind me.
- Caroline Forbes: [uncertain] What mess?
- Valerie Tulle: You know, the whole reason I'm afraid of Julian. The big secret. The entire horror story.
- [which Caroline clearly knows nothing about]
- Valerie Tulle: Stefan must have told you.
- [no response]
- Valerie Tulle: He told me he wouldn't tell anyone, but... I didn't know that that included you. I mean, his loyalty certainly is attractive, isn't it?
- Caroline Forbes: [shamed] Look, I'm sorry. What didn't he tell me?
- Valerie Tulle: Never mind. As you were saying, Matilda Pettigrew from Liverpool. Hmm. It's good. I like it.
- Valerie Tulle: It seems a vampire soul inside a human body does not a perfect match make.
- Dr. Jo Laughlin: [weakly] What does that mean?
- Valerie Tulle: The Phoenix Stone traps vampire souls. Oscar had a vampire body, got some other vampire's soul, and then he lost the plot. Jo is a human. Clearly a basic human body is unable to contain the essence of a vampire soul. Add that together, carry the one, you're a decomposing mess.
- [shocked reactions from Caroline, Jo and Ric]
- Caroline Forbes: [led her away by the arm] Thank you, Valerie, your tact is *wildly* appreciated.
- Valerie Tulle: I'm just saying that she was a corpse who was meant to be a corpse.
- Caroline Forbes: We know. We heard you. But that corpse was supposed to be Ric's wife. Who died with two kids inside of her on their wedding day.
- Valerie Tulle: Sorry.
- [shakes her head]
- Valerie Tulle: I... I had no idea.
- Caroline Forbes: Yeah, well, now you do. So you can sit down, quietly, while he says goodbye.
- Julian: [to the wallflower at the party] Ah, what a pretty dress.
- Mary Louise: Do you think? Nora didn't even notice.
- Julian: Well, Nora needs her eyes examined.
- Mary Louise: She's talking to everyone at this party but me. I feel like a fool, running around trying to impress my own girlfriend.
- Nora Hildegard: [Mary Louise has had blood] Mare. Did you change? Looking very Scarlett Joha-
- [is grabbed and kissed and led off]