Paddington 2 (2017)

Hugh Grant: Phoenix Buchanan

Photos 

Quotes 

• Phoenix Buchanan : Exit bear, pursued by an actor... ugh!

  [falls into train car] 

• Phoenix Buchanan : [laughs]  Oh very very funny. Anyway! They do say that at Madame Kozlova's all your dreams come true. So, if you had one wish tonight what would it be?

  Paddington : Oh that's easy. I'd like to get my Aunt Lucy a birthday present.

  [the crowd all say 'Aw'] 

  Mary Brown : [quietly]  Darling.

• Phoenix Buchanan : But! I do have a little bit of good news that might turn your frown, upside down.

  Mary Brown : Oh yes?

  Phoenix Buchanan : It looks...

  [crosses his fingers] 

  Phoenix Buchanan : ... fingers, fingers, fingers - as though the funding may be coming through for my one-man show.

  Mary Brown : Oh. Right.

  Phoenix Buchanan : It's an evening of monologue and song featuring some of my better-known characters. Would you like a little preview?

• Phoenix Buchanan : [brandishes a sword]  Stage combat. Level Four.

  Mrs. Bird : [grabs a nearby rifle]  Well, where I come from, *laddie*... they teach you never to bring a knife to a gunfight!

  [cocks the rifle] 

  Phoenix Buchanan : I think you'll find that fires plastic darts.

  Mrs. Bird : [fires a dart into the middle of his forehead]  So it does.

  Phoenix Buchanan : [pulls off the dart]  Whereas this sword - looks very sharp!

• Phoenix Buchanan : Oh, well that sounds entirely... plausible.

  Henry Brown : Does it? Great! Well, I'm delighted to say that everything seems tickety-boo.

  Phoenix Buchanan : Wonderful.

  Henry Brown : So! I'll nip back to the office and get the boys to type that up ASAP. And we'll hope to see you soon!

  Phoenix Buchanan : Indeed! Perhaps next time, *not* in your pyjamas. Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

  Mary Brown : [laughing]  He's such a silly one!

  Phoenix Buchanan : Now, now.

• [Judy and Jonathan Brown telephone Phoenix and play a recording of Felicity Fanshawe that they have secretly recorded. Phoenix doesn't realise it is a recording and thinks he is speaking to Felicity] 

  Felicity Fanshawe : [recording]  Nice buns, by the way.

  Phoenix Buchanan : I beg your pardon?

  Felicity Fanshawe : [recording]  Really nice buns.

  Phoenix Buchanan : Thank you, darling. I've never had any complaints about Mr and Mrs Botty-Cheek.

• Mary Brown : Mysterious things have been happening all over town.

  Phoenix Buchanan : Oh yes?

  Mary Brown : Strange characters turning up at every landmark in that book.

  Phoenix Buchanan : Are they!