- Murray Weiner: On, Dumbo and Jumbo, on, Mason and Dixon, on, Cosmo and Kramer and Richard M. Nixon.
- Edison Elf: That wasn't even close.
- [Elves singing]: Oh, we work, work, work, work, work, work,work We really bust our heinies, They hire Elves for this work, work, work 'cause we're cheaper the Chinese.
- Murray Weiner: [about the Jack-in-the-Boxer] This would at least get an honorable mention, if there was a contest for world's worst invention.
- Edison Elf: What?
- Murray Weiner: It's stupid.
- Edison Elf: It's clever.
- Murray Weiner: It's nasty.
- Edison Elf: It's nice.
- Murray Weiner: Go show it to Santa and get his advice.
- Edison Elf: I will, I will!
- Murray Weiner: He forgot to pay his bill.