The Disaster Artist (2017)
James Franco: Tommy, 'Johnny'
Photos
Quotes
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[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair : Action!
[Wiseau enters the scene]
Tommy Wiseau : I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit! I did not hit her. I did not.
[throws water bottle on the ground]
Tommy Wiseau : Oh, hi Mark.
[pause, then the crew applauds before Greg hugs Wiseau]
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Mrs. Sestero : How old are you?
Tommy Wiseau : Don't worry, I'm Greg age.
Mrs. Sestero : You're 19?
[Tommy shrugs]
Mrs. Sestero : [Sarcastic] Yeah. I just turned 14.
Tommy Wiseau : [Not knowing it's sarcastic] Wow, happy birthday!
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Tommy Wiseau : [Practicing his lines] 'Oh, hi Mark... ' 'Oh, hi Mark... ' 'Oh, hi Mark... '
Tommy Wiseau : Oh, hi Greg!
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Philip : Hey, Tommy, how old is Denny supposed to be?
Tommy Wiseau : He your age. 15-16 years old boy.
Philip : Uh... I'm 26
Tommy Wiseau : [pauses] Same thing.
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Sandy Schklair : Take 17, Action!
Tommy Wiseau : [Wiseau enters the scene] I hit her!
Sandy Schklair : No! Do you want to change the line?
Tommy Wiseau : Script is script. Script stay same.
Greg Sestero : You're doing great, man! We'll get there!
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Greg Sestero : Tommy, dude, this really isn't necessary.
Tommy Wiseau : No, no! Very necessary. I need to show my ass to sell this picture.
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[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair : Action!
[Wiseau enters the scene. He pauses, forgetting his lines again]
Tommy Wiseau : What is line?
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[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair : Ready, and, Action!
[Wiseau opens the rooftop door and steps into the scene. He pauses for several seconds]
Tommy Wiseau : What line? What is the line?
Sandy Schklair : I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit. I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark.
Tommy Wiseau : Okay.
[Wiseau returns to the rooftop exit]
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Justin Hammer : Come here, Tommy. Just because you want it doesn't mean it can happen. Okay? It's one in a million, even if you have Brando's talent. It's not going to happen for you, okay? But now you have to go.
Tommy Wiseau : [upset] But, maybe I... maybe.
Justin Hammer : I'm not saying "maybe", I'm saying "not in a million years"!
Tommy Wiseau : But after that?
Justin Hammer : And *not* after!
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Greg Sestero : I wish we could just make our own movie.
Tommy Wiseau : That great idea.
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Tommy Wiseau : Los Angeles, everybody want to be star. All the pretty boys. They're lining up for the big shot.
Greg Sestero : Just uh, just have to get lucky, I guess.
Tommy Wiseau : No. No. It's not luck, Greg. Greg, you have to be the best. You have to be the best you can be. And never give up.
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[Tommy orders Juliette off the set for make-up after seeing a pimple on her shoulder]
Greg Sestero : W-what are you doing? Why are you acting like this?
Tommy Wiseau : I make American movie. She needs to look sexy. Beautiful!
[Greg grabs Tommy off the set]
Greg Sestero : Come here. Fuck, man.
Tommy Wiseau : I know I'm hard on her.
Greg Sestero : Yeah, you're hard, but it's not just that. What's going on with you?
Tommy Wiseau : Stanley Kubrick, he nice to actors? Alfred Hitchcock? Let me tell you something, Greg. He do this movie, Birds.
Greg Sestero : Yeah, I'm aware of The Birds.
Tommy Wiseau : On this movie, he terrify actors. He locked them in room, he throw, he throw birds at them. Real birds! Nasty stuff. The actors, they crack every day. But this movie win every award. Is Mr. Hitchcock bad man? No. He great director!
Greg Sestero : Yeah, but he was an asshole, and I bet he didn't direct with his fucking dick out.
Tommy Wiseau : Oh, really? Well, maybe we check the record, okay? And you know, for your information, where director come from, dictator. Rest my case.
Greg Sestero : You can't treat them like this! it's not right!
Tommy Wiseau : I treat them how I treat them! If anyone needs to be upset here, it's me, quite frankly.
Greg Sestero : Wait - why?
Tommy Wiseau : I give them job, I give them salary. I already spent five million dollars on this movie, Greg.
Greg Sestero : My God, are you kidding me? Five million dollars...?
Tommy Wiseau : And they are not grateful! Nobody respect my vision! I know what they say, Greg. I hear them. Nobody trust me. Not even you, Greg!
Greg Sestero : That's... what are you...
Tommy Wiseau : Oh, see? You don't even trust me!
[Tommy proceeds to walk back into the set]
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[Tommy walks out of the screening of The Room, disappointed that people are laughing at his movie. Greg follows him]
Greg Sestero : Hey, Tommy.
Tommy Wiseau : They hate it.
Greg Sestero : No, no, they're, they're just laughing.
Tommy Wiseau : They're laughing. Laughing at me. Maybe it's true, you know. Maybe everybody right. Maybe, maybe I just big joke, ha, ha.
Greg Sestero : No, Tommy...
Tommy Wiseau : I try to open my heart, show them my soul, and they just hate me. Even you hate me, Greg.
Greg Sestero : Hey, hey, hey. Listen to me, all right? All right, that thing out there, that's your movie. You made that. All right, like you said, you did that all by yourself. You know how special that is?
[Tommy groans]
Greg Sestero : Hey, it's fucking incredible. How many people can say they have done something like that?
Tommy Wiseau : I don't know, one thousand?
Greg Sestero : All right, and yeah. Maybe it didn't turn out exactly as you hoped, but just listen for a second.
Tommy Wiseau : Sound like they're laughing.
Greg Sestero : All right, come here.
[Tommy and Greg return to the theatre, to see the audience still laughing. We see the scene where Johnny kills himself on screen]
Greg Sestero : Look how much fun they're having. They fucking love it, man! How often do you think Hitchcock got a response like this?
Tommy Wiseau : Never.
Tommy Wiseau : [after Johnny throws the television on screen] Greg, why you help me?
Greg Sestero : 'Cause we're friends.
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Henry : [Post-Credits scene] Hey, how are you doing?
Tommy Wiseau : Fine. Yeah, I'm fine. Why you ask?
Henry : Why are you standing against a wall?
Tommy Wiseau : Look, I just a guy leaning on a wall! No big deal!
Henry : Why you so lonely? Tell me.
Tommy Wiseau : What? I'm just standing here alone. Don't mean I'm lonely.
Henry : You need help, I see it.
Tommy Wiseau : It's not pity party, it's just party.
Henry : You go with me?
Tommy Wiseau : Go where?
Henry : To my house.
Tommy Wiseau : [pause] I'm not going anywhere with you.
Henry : You think you have long hair, you own the world? Is that the idea, huh?
Tommy Wiseau : I stop you. I stop you right there. What is this accent? It sound familiar. You from New Orleans?
Henry : Yeah, so what?
Tommy Wiseau : What part?
Henry : Chalmette.
Tommy Wiseau : I love New Orleans.
Henry : You know where Chalmette?
Tommy Wiseau : Yeah.
Henry : Okay, cool. You want a drink or something?
Tommy Wiseau : No. I'm not thirsty either. I just want to stand here.
Henry : What's your name? Tommy, right?
Tommy Wiseau : Yeah. My name's Tommy, with a capital 'Go away'.
Henry : It's okay! Have a nice one. Okay?
Tommy Wiseau : Okay.
Henry : Okay, bye.
[leaves]
Tommy Wiseau : [confused] 'Kay...
Henry : [sighs] People are very strange these days! Oh, hi Betty.
Tommy Wiseau : My god... Who are these friends Greg has?
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Greg Sestero : You're really gonna make this thing?
Tommy Wiseau : No, Greg. We are going to do it. Together.
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Juliette : [as Tommy is dry-humping her navel while filming the sex scene] I think you're aiming a little bit high.
Tommy Wiseau : I aim where I aim, just do the scene.
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Greg Sestero : We are doing this.
Tommy Wiseau : Tomorrow, this will all be yours, Greg.
Greg Sestero : Ah! We will own you, L.A.!
Tommy Wiseau : Watch out, here we come!
Greg Sestero : You will know our names!
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Tommy Wiseau : [Throwing newspapers and a trash can in a fit of rage] Everybody betray me!
[Kicks the newspaper stand]
Tommy Wiseau : Ow, my foot.
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Greg Sestero : Tommy, that felt fucking amazing, man!
Tommy Wiseau : There you go, now you're acting, Greg.
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Tommy Wiseau : [after driving around aimlessly] Sorry I'm late, traffic was crazy!
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Tommy Wiseau : Don't talk to robo-crab, he's shy.
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Tommy Wiseau : What is this? This makeup. You look like you're swimming in lake.
Carolyn Minnott : It's a hundred degrees in here.
Tommy Wiseau : Makeup!
Greg Sestero : Tommy, if you're not gonna pay for air conditioning, you at least have to pay for water.
Juliette : Could we maybe just have a little bit of water before the scene? I...
Tommy Wiseau : Okay, I stop you. I stop everybody right there, okay? Nobody in Hollywood will give you water either, okay?
Greg Sestero : That's not true. Dude, we can't work like this!
Tommy Wiseau : Well, I'm not Santa Claus, all right? Maybe you go buy water for everybody, *Greg,* okay? Maybe girlfriend bring you some water or something.
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Tommy Wiseau : [while auditioning] The rules to the class are simple.
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[Tommy prepares to film his sex scene, and he is walking in the set completely naked]
Tommy Wiseau : Okay, okay, we go.
Greg Sestero : Tommy, Tommy, this is not necessary.
Tommy Wiseau : No. It very necessary. I need to show my ass to sell this movie, okay?
Greg Sestero : That's not true.
Sandy Schklair : At least we have a closed set.
Tommy Wiseau : Not closed set. Open set. Life is not closed set! I want everyone to see!
[points at Greg]
Tommy Wiseau : You, especially.
Greg Sestero : W-what? Why? What?
Tommy Wiseau : Brad Pitt do this in the Legend of the Fall.
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Tommy Wiseau : [Re-enacting the 'You're tearing me apart' scene from Rebel Without a Cause] You're taking me apart!
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Raphael : We gotta get going, okay - we're already four hours behind.
Tommy Wiseau : Okay, well, whose fault that?
Raphael : [pauses, flabbergasted] *Yours.*
Tommy Wiseau : Uh, my fault?
Raphael : You're late *every* goddamn day.
Tommy Wiseau : Alright, that your five cents. I'm fucking director!
Raphael : Exactly!
Tommy Wiseau : Exactly!
Raphael : Exactly!
Tommy Wiseau : Exactly - turn these lights on, right now!
Raphael : If I turn on the lights, it's getting hotter.
Tommy Wiseau : Be professional! Do your job!
Raphael : You do *your* job!
Greg Sestero : Tommy, it's hot enough as is!
Tommy Wiseau : Greg, so you know about light too, huh? You know everything - you know water, light, girlfriend.
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Tommy Wiseau : [about to film the love scene] We go, okay? Rolling?
[Stops and notices a pimple on Juliette]
Tommy Wiseau : Wait wait wait! Cut cut! What is this? What is this, this disgusting...
Juliette : [offended] It's my body!
Tommy Wiseau : No, this, pimples on the... Makeup! Makeup, come fix this disgusting body!
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Sandy Schklair : [Wiseau is sitting back up after acting the suicide moment]
[Whispering]
Sandy Schklair : Why is he getting back up?
[Wiseau picks up the red dres]
Sandy Schklair : Cut!
Tommy Wiseau : No, don't cut! Don't cut! Why you cut, Sandy? This is great! This real acting!
Sandy Schklair : If you're gonna writhe around with the dress, maybe do it before you shoot yourself in the head and blow your brains out.
Tommy Wiseau : I disagree!
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Sandy Schklair : Take 67, Action!
Tommy Wiseau : [Wiseau enters the scene while looking directly into the camera] I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit. I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark.
Sandy Schklair : [Frustrated] What the f- where are you looking? It doesn't work when you're looking into the camera!
Tommy Wiseau : What?
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Tommy Wiseau : [after the end of the movie with a standing ovation] Okay! Wow! I'm glad you liked my comedic movie! Exactly how I intend it! You know, I have vision for this movie. But I never make this movie...
[points at Greg]
Tommy Wiseau : ... without my friend. We followed our dream.
[motions for Greg to come join him on stage]
Tommy Wiseau : Come down here, Baby Face!
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Sandy Schklair : Action!
[Wiseau doesn't walk into the scene]
Sandy Schklair : Action!
[Wiseau still doesn't enter]
Sandy Schklair : Action! Action! Action!
Tommy Wiseau : You have to say it loud, I can't hear! Say "action" so I can hear!
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Amber : I'm pretty sure Stanislavski's dead?
Tommy Wiseau : He not dead I just speak to him. What do you think I speak to ghost?
